Programming Jokes February - Obligatory Witty Remark

[DrTaxi]

[url=http://ask.fm/garryjnewman/answer/131589777595]Garry Newman on learning to program.[/url]

[quote][B]Hey Gary i'm interested in learning C# any tips?[/B]

Learning to code is like learning to masturbate. You could read books about it, watch videos, watch other people doing it, but that will only teach you so much. To really understand it you need to do it. Over and over. You need to do it because you enjoy it, and want to learn everything about it.[/quote]

[Gufu]

[IMG]https://40.media.tumblr.com/4d14e76c407ef2e53e41439f2ee0b8c6/tumblr_nsrfw2cbqU1qd1n99o1_540.png[/IMG]

Crossthreading, engaged.

[r0b0tsquid]

I always use out-dentation, it makes my code more readable.

			int main()
			{
		if (true)
		{
	if (some_condition)
do_something();
	else if (other_condition)
do_something_else();
		}
		goto next_statement;
			next_statement:
		printf("Suck it fags");
		return 0;
			}

[backwardspy]

[QUOTE=r0b0tsquid;48605670]I always use out-dentation, it makes my code more readable.

			int main()
			{
		if (true)
		{
	if (some_condition)
do_something();
	else if (other_condition)
do_something_else();
		}
		goto next_statement;
			next_statement:
		printf("Suck it fags");
		return 0;
			}

[/QUOTE]
In-out-dentation master race!

      int main()
      {
        if (true)
    {
          if (some_condition)
do_something();
          else if (other_condition)
do_something_else();
        }
    goto next_statement;
        next_statement:
    printf("Suck it fags");
        return 0;
      }

[tomba99]

I got an UDP joke for you. But u might not get it.

Why do java programmers wear glasses?
Because they can't C#

* kill me *

[Protocol7]

[QUOTE=tomba99;48606301]I got an UDP joke for you. But u might not get it.

Why do java programmers wear glasses?
Because they can't C#

* kill me *[/QUOTE]

this thread is 22 pages long did you really think neither of those have been posted at least 3 times

[tomba99]

[QUOTE=Protocol7;48606342]this thread is 22 pages long did you really think neither of those have been posted at least 3 times[/QUOTE]

I just mean that these are so bad :D

[helifreak]

[QUOTE=tomba99;48606301]I got an UDP joke for you. But u might not get it.

Why do java programmers wear glasses?
Because they can't C#

* kill me *[/QUOTE]

Three pages back:
[QUOTE=Dromlexer;47817263]You reminded me of this.

[t]http://pcp-comics.com/img/comics/18.jpg[/t][/QUOTE]
Later that page:
[QUOTE=Exploderguy;47882697]Do you know why Java programmers are bad at programming?

[sp] Because they can't see sharp V:V:V [/sp][/QUOTE]

15 pages back:
[QUOTE=Freezebug;47572939]Why do java programmers wear glasses?

[sp]because they can't C# (See sharp)[/sp][/QUOTE]

And also:
[QUOTE=Rocket;47573138][QUOTE=Matt-;39563363]Why do Java developers wear glasses?

Because they don't [B]C#[/B].[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=bobiniki;44498440]Why do Java developers wear glasses?

Because they don't C#[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=Handsome Matt;47081063]Why do Java developers wear glasses?

Because they don't [B]C#[/B].[/QUOTE]
[/QUOTE]
Etc.
EDIT: Fuck I missed one.
[QUOTE=joni1843;45528590]Why does a java developer develop in java?
Because he doesn't see sharp.[/QUOTE]

[Dromlexer]

[QUOTE=Fourier;48603147][IMG]http://www.strategicinformatics.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/06/e1023ed1-c600-41eb-8eb9-72d84eccbefe.jpg[/IMG]

Old but gold[/QUOTE]

Obligatory

[IMG]https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/pointers.png[/IMG]

[P1raten]

[QUOTE=Rocket;48625976]Well if we're posting XKCD, here's my all time favorite strip:
[img]https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/tar.png[/img][/QUOTE]

tar -zxvf file.tar.gz

Is it bad that I have that memorized?

[Fourier]

[QUOTE=P1raten;48626027]

tar -zxvf file.tar.gz

Is it bad that I have that memorized?[/QUOTE]

Yes, hell has special place for you : Hell's system admin.

[helifreak]

[QUOTE=Fourier;48626421]Yes, hell has special place for you : Hell's system admin.[/QUOTE]

Would it even be that much worse?

[Fourier]

Yes, everytime you write unknown command a special knife slices skin off you.

[DaCool]

[QUOTE=Fourier;48626421]Yes, hell has special place for you : Hell's system admin.[/QUOTE]

Once I realized the meanings (z, zipped; x, extract; v, verbose; f, file) it was pretty logical to me.

[Fourier]

Math joke but still:

A : [Insert some shitty argument]

B: Your argument has no basis.

A: Looks like I it got transformed into null space.

[Goz3rr]

[QUOTE=Coolboy;48629784]Once I realized the meanings (z, zipped; x, extract; v, verbose; f, file) it was pretty logical to me.[/QUOTE]

you just imagine Arnold Schwarzenegger going eXtract Zhe File! (xzf)

[cartman300]

[url]http://ozone.codeplex.com/SourceControl/latest#OZone/AtariGame/Game.xml[/url]

Dear god, it's a program written [I]in [B]xml.[/B][/I]

[Phantoml994]

I encountered this in an allegedly serious pathfinding Java library yesterday. Apparently, they've never heard of boxes, despite the function name.

[IMG]http://i.imgur.com/cKHOpGd.png[/IMG]

[quote]
[URL="http://www.smbc-comics.com/?id=1957"]http://www.smbc-comics.com/?id=1957[/URL]

[IMG]http://smbc-comics.com/comics/20100802after.gif[/IMG][/quote]

[Phantoml994]

[QUOTE=Rocket;48647184][url=https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyperrectangle]That's the actual term for it.[/url][/QUOTE]

Well, I know there's technically nothing wrong with it, but to me it just sounds silly, like calling a cube hypersquare, especially if they don't stick with the terminology throughout the code.

[Darwin226]

[QUOTE=Rocket;48647184][url=https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyperrectangle]That's the actual term for it.[/url][/QUOTE]

It's the actual term for a much more general thing of which they appear to be using a specific case.

[Darwin226]

I guess I could see a pathfinding library working with n-dimensional spaces.

[Gmod4ever]

[QUOTE=Darwin226;48654946]I guess I could see a pathfinding library working with n-dimensional spaces.[/QUOTE]

"Oh god! Where did the alien go!"

"It's not a question of 'where did he go', my friend."

"What do you mean? What is the right question?"

"[b]When[/b] did he go?"

[Tamschi]

[QUOTE=Darwin226;48654946]I guess I could see a pathfinding library working with n-dimensional spaces.[/QUOTE]

It actually makes a lot of sense. The algorithms barely change as you increase dimensions.

[Darwin226]

[QUOTE=Tamschi;48656915]It actually makes a lot of sense. The algorithms barely change as you increase dimensions.[/QUOTE]

I wasn't sarcastic. Though is does sound funny.
There's no reason why the extra dimensions had to be spatial in a usual sense.
X, Y, Z for the coordinates in the relative space, then W for the room id, Q for the building id...
I can see that being the case.

[Tamschi]

[QUOTE=Darwin226;48658591]I wasn't sarcastic. Though is does sound funny.
There's no reason why the extra dimensions had to be spatial in a usual sense.
X, Y, Z for the coordinates in the relative space, then W for the room id, Q for the building id...
I can see that being the case.[/QUOTE]

I actually have the core interfaces and one algorithm for n-dimensional pathfinding sitting somewhere on my drive, because I wanted to implement navigation foam.
I'm really pretty bad at anything discontinuous with more than two dimensions though, so I didn't get further than that.

[Darwin226]

[QUOTE=Tamschi;48659058]
I'm really pretty bad at anything discontinuous with more than two dimensions though, so I didn't get further than that.[/QUOTE]

I think that might be a general human thing

[DrTaxi]

[QUOTE=Amiga OS;48673637][url]http://alexjs.com/[/url][/QUOTE]

They're serious, you know.

[inaba]

[QUOTE=Amiga OS;48673637][url]http://alexjs.com/[/url][/QUOTE]

Tested that out a while ago

[vid]http://catpanic.eu/upl/2015-09-03_15-37-07.webm[/vid]

ALso, Stallman's speach is 100% clean :v:

[Clavus]

Spied this one on [url=https://twitter.com/KostasAAA/status/643855633230471168/photo/1]Twitter[/url], the AAA text adventure:

[img]https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CO9vSPIWcAAn7Cd.png[/img]

[DrTaxi]

>send WM_KEYDOWN(0x47) to pay respects