Programming Jokes February - Obligatory Witty Remark - Developers

[QUOTE=TeamEnternode;49032245]Why do Java programmers wear glasses Because this joke is old[/QUOTE] Atleast -127 years old

[url=https://twitter.com/BobRossGameDev]The Joy of Game Development, with Bob Ross.[/url] [img]http://i.imgur.com/yJgRylP.png[/img]

I've just readed some tweets and now i feel better with myself :*)

I don't know about others but this seemed funny to me [code]char equals = '=';[/code]

full: [code]throw new NullPointerException();[/code] shortened: [code]throw null;[/code] Double humor bonus: You throw an exception while in the process of throwing an exception by not throwing a valid exception thereby causing one. [i]Yo dawg, inception.[/i] This meme potential is [i]exceptional[/i].

Not sure what you were expecting from PHP to be honest.

[QUOTE=Coolboy;49096157]Was poking around old shell scripts, found an install script which downloads the latest TS3 64x linux client, ohh god... [code]wget -O TeamSpeak3.run http://dl.4players.de/ts/releases/$(wget -qO - http://dl.4players.de/ts/releases/ | grep DIR | grep -o 'href=".*/">' | grep "\." | tail -n 1 | cut -d\" -f2)""$(wget -qO - http://dl.4players.de/ts/releases/$(wget -qO - http://dl.4players.de/ts/releases/ | grep DIR | grep -o 'href=".*/">' | grep "\." | tail -n 1 | cut -d\" -f2)| grep amd64 | grep -o 'href=".*run">' | cut -d\" -f2)[/code] And it still works! I bet no-one can make a shorter one. v:v:v[/QUOTE] Makes me happy I've lost all my old older code

[QUOTE=Coolboy;49096157]Was poking around old shell scripts, found an install script which downloads the latest TS3 64x linux client, ohh god... [code]wget -O TeamSpeak3.run http://dl.4players.de/ts/releases/$(wget -qO - http://dl.4players.de/ts/releases/ | grep DIR | grep -o 'href=".*/">' | grep "\." | tail -n 1 | cut -d\" -f2)""$(wget -qO - http://dl.4players.de/ts/releases/$(wget -qO - http://dl.4players.de/ts/releases/ | grep DIR | grep -o 'href=".*/">' | grep "\." | tail -n 1 | cut -d\" -f2)| grep amd64 | grep -o 'href=".*run">' | cut -d\" -f2)[/code] And it still works! I bet no-one can make a shorter one. v:v:v[/QUOTE] Heh, i've made one that downloaded port off a website. I deleted it because i decided to not keep porn on my computer anymore. The worst part? It was actually an abomination (if batch and bash had a mutant ugly smelling child together) that runs on windows with cygwin bin directory in your path. Was about the same size.

[url]https://twitter.com/CommitIssues[/url] Someone from Reddit made a Twitter Bot that monitors GitHub and tweets commit messages that have profanity. It's some funny shit.

I know why God never answers. He is constantly DDOSed by prayers. [sp]This joke is mine, Fourier copyright reserved[/sp]

[QUOTE=benbb;49108254][url]https://twitter.com/CommitIssues[/url] Someone from Reddit made a Twitter Bot that monitors GitHub and tweets commit messages that have profanity. It's some funny shit.[/QUOTE] Shame it doesn't give out the sources to the commits

[QUOTE=Fourier;49108481]I know why God never answers. He is constantly DDOSed by prayers. [sp]This joke is mine, Fourier copyright reserved[/sp][/QUOTE] More like we never pass the authorization.

[QUOTE=benbb;49108254][url]https://twitter.com/CommitIssues[/url] Someone from Reddit made a Twitter Bot that monitors GitHub and tweets commit messages that have profanity. It's some funny shit.[/QUOTE] Related: [url=https://github.com/Dobiasd/programming-language-subreddits-and-their-choice-of-words]Programming language subreddits and their choice of words[/url] [img]https://github.com/Dobiasd/programming-language-subreddits-and-their-choice-of-words/raw/master/img/cursing.png[/img]

[QUOTE=Coolboy;49096157]Was poking around old shell scripts, found an install script which downloads the latest TS3 64x linux client, ohh god... [code]wget -O TeamSpeak3.run http://dl.4players.de/ts/releases/$(wget -qO - http://dl.4players.de/ts/releases/ | grep DIR | grep -o 'href=".*/">' | grep "\." | tail -n 1 | cut -d\" -f2)""$(wget -qO - http://dl.4players.de/ts/releases/$(wget -qO - http://dl.4players.de/ts/releases/ | grep DIR | grep -o 'href=".*/">' | grep "\." | tail -n 1 | cut -d\" -f2)| grep amd64 | grep -o 'href=".*run">' | cut -d\" -f2)[/code] And it still works! I bet no-one can make a shorter one. v:v:v[/QUOTE] That reminds me of when I tried to code shit at 3am [code]db[ id ] = [ db[ id ][ 0 ], db[ id ][ 1 ], db[ id ][ 2 ], db[ id ][ 3 ], db[ id ][ 4 ] + val ]; [/code]

how rude [img]http://i.imgur.com/GCTKyYe.png[/img] [editline]14th November 2015[/editline] ohgod what is this [img]http://i.imgur.com/mtDR4yJ.png[/img]

[QUOTE=meharryp;49110902]That reminds me of when I tried to code shit at 3am [code]db[ id ] = [ db[ id ][ 0 ], db[ id ][ 1 ], db[ id ][ 2 ], db[ id ][ 3 ], db[ id ][ 4 ] + val ]; [/code][/QUOTE] I am glad I am slowly getting the hang of bash, makes programming C look tame in comparison.

[url]http://www.clickhole.com/article/8-things-only-computer-programmers-will-understand-3513[/url] [quote]When you’re telling your non-programmer friends about JavaScript, they assume you’re talking about the actor.[/quote]

I don't understand none of these items

[QUOTE=gonzalolog;49123768]I don't understand none of these items[/QUOTE] That's because Clickhole's an Onion, Inc. site. They're spoofing Buzzfeed with this one I think.

[img]http://i.imgur.com/ubdrtlF.png[/img] this is why I drink

[QUOTE=DrTaxi;49175086][img]http://i.imgur.com/ubdrtlF.png[/img] this is why I drink[/QUOTE] So, how many times they had people drop all their tables because of this image?

That's practically gore

[QUOTE=Amiga OS;49185968][IMG]https://i.imgur.com/WdRPqye.png[/IMG][/QUOTE] Jesus christ nsfw tag that man.

Does the OS really let that go through without confirmation?

[QUOTE=Darwin226;49190430]Does the OS really let that go through without confirmation?[/QUOTE] Yes. If you have root on linux it assumes you know what you're doing.

[QUOTE=itisjuly;49190437]Yes. If you have root on linux it assumes you know what you're doing.[/QUOTE] The only exception is "rm -rf /" which causes under certain distributions an error if the "--no-preserve-root" flag is not set. Anything else however like for example "rm -rf /*" goes through regardless. I made that mistake once while cleaning up temporary folders. I cried myself to sleep while letting mint reinstall.

[QUOTE=itisjuly;49190437]Yes. If you have root on linux it assumes you know what you're doing.[/QUOTE] A foolish assumption

[QUOTE=Coolboy;49190473]The only exception is "rm -rf /" which causes under certain distributions an error if the "--no-preserve-root" flag is not set. Anything else however like for example "rm -rf /*" goes through regardless. I made that mistake once while cleaning up temporary folders. I cried myself to sleep while letting mint reinstall.[/QUOTE] [I]Steam[/I] made that mistake for a while.

[QUOTE=Coolboy;49190473]The only exception is "rm -rf /" which causes under certain distributions an error if the "--no-preserve-root" flag is not set. Anything else however like for example "rm -rf /*" goes through regardless. I made that mistake once while cleaning up temporary folders. I cried myself to sleep while letting mint reinstall.[/QUOTE] Debian warns you :ok:. I figured I would try to see how it looks when you do delete everything. Burst out laughing when my wallpaper was replaced with solid blue. Turns out this VM had my shared folder mounted, RIP whatever was in there. Fuck. Time for Recuva and praying. Can't stop laughing either way so it's fine.