• The Super Friendly Social and Love Advice Thread v3 - February
    10,002 replies, posted
So, now that the college is back, I am also back to the feeling that I am wasting a huge opportunity to get to know more people and make more friends. Problem is, now I have even less time in college (8 hours) and all of it is back to back classes. Since my transportation is currently very time-strict, I can't add much to that. What should I do?
[QUOTE=NuclearAnnhilation;37448772] i know i should just stick this through but its so hard i dont know what to do. im honestly miserable right now[/QUOTE] you're just adjusting, take solace in the fact you won't feel like this forever. [quote]my parents dont want me having a job etc[/quote] why is that
[QUOTE=Mobon1;37446427]Actually Option #3 looks like the best one. Why'd you break up? [editline]28th August 2012[/editline] shitfuck wrong page [editline]28th August 2012[/editline] oh it was on the last one whatevs[/quote] Uhh, long distance relationship. Chances of getting together-together any time soon are slim. (I feel like Commander Shepard saying that.) She felt like it'd probably be best to end it. We're back together now and I thought I was okay with everything but I guess maybe I'm not.
[QUOTE=thisispain;37452343]you're just adjusting, take solace in the fact you won't feel like this forever. why is that[/QUOTE] they said they want me to focus on studies for at least my first semester but ive had a job since freshman year of high school, its weird not having spending money. im going home this weekend for labor day since its 3 day and im going to see some of my best friends who went off to another school since they'll be back in town too. this should make me feel better also a part of me is considering going to orlando for school instead. its far enough away from home so i can be off on my own (2 hours) but also close enough that i can visit home really whenever
[QUOTE=NuclearAnnhilation;37457402]they said they want me to focus on studies for at least my first semester but ive had a job since freshman year of high school, its weird not having spending money.[/QUOTE] They might be right. I don't know about where you are, but here everyone tends to do poorly their first year. Best to try to mitigate that.
yeah they have a point so i dont wanna fuck this up [editline]29th August 2012[/editline] i think every american college kid does shitty their first year
[QUOTE=JohnnyMo1;37457474]They might be right. I don't know about where you are, but here everyone tends to do poorly their first year. Best to try to mitigate that.[/QUOTE] People party too much their first year, rather than focus on studies. Not getting a job once your in college/uni seems a little extreme. It wouldn't interfere as much I would think. I guess it depends on the person.
[B]Well, fuck.[/B] Let me explain. Months ago, I talked about australia girl. Got over it when she went away. She came back in the country, I start falling for her. We'd sent each other letters while she was away, it seemed like something was going to happen. As we continue talking it seems like a sure thing. I really like this girl at this point, when I was trying to get over her I'd tried to find others, nothing else really felt the same, I couldn't be the way I could be with this girl. It seemed a sure thing, she obviously liked me too. Then we start talking tonight and she mentions how she's telling one of her friends about the changes she's making in her life, 'figuring herself out' and shit. I ask what she means - one of the points is sexuality. I remember she was bi so I think, oh I hope she hasn't gone full lesbian now, so I ask quite bluntly what it is. I remember thinking "I could just not ask, will probably be nothing", but I did anyway. Turns out she's asexual. Doesn't like sex. I'd spent some nights, some mornings, the odd free moments daydreaming about what we could have. Wouldn't it be nice I thought, if we were making dinner and I gave her a little tickle while she was stirring something - what a great girl. And obviously I'd thought about having sex with her. We went on talking about it, I thought fuck it, honesty is the best policy, there really is no hope here. I thought, well was I deluding myself, did she even like me at all or was I seeing signs that weren't there? I just asked. She said basically yes, we matched, but I liked sex, it couldn't work. Which is true. She said she wanted a companion, not a boyfriend. You know I'm sure she's probably thinking she's a bit weird for being asexual, but I'm too busy being hurt to be bothered about that right now. People say ambition, and dreams, and hopes are free - well, they don't fucking feel free when you realise that they're never going to happen, it feels like you're absolutely reeling actually. They're not free, they just don't cost anything. Where do I put my hopes and dreams now? Academia? Do I just think, oh I'll really concentrate on uni work? That's not enough or anywhere near the same. When you've spent some time telling someone all about yourself and you get to know each other, and in fact, nearly everything they do seems perfectly complimentary to you, how do you find the sheer [I]energy[/I] to chat up someone new? When you want something how will something else do? How does she expect me to keep on talking to her? I can't do that, because I'll just take every opportunity to convince myself that maybe she's wrong. But I can't exactly not talk her just after she's told me this now can I. How am I going to get to sleep tonight? I'm not being melodramatic when say could someone please give me some advice I have no idea what to do with myself generally. I'm sure some of that will be shock, but I am really quite sad.
I'm in a hilariously awkward social scene right now. I just moved to a new city (san antonio) from new mexico, I'm in highschool (9th grade) and I know absolutely nobody. Lunches are terribly awkward, I just sit by myself among the also hilariously crowded lunches. I know it's only the third day, but that doesn't make me feel any less weird. I feel like a round piece in a jigsaw puzzle. I talk to people in my periods but nothing really happens other than that.
You know whats awkward? Seeing your previous crush at the club. What makes it more awkward is that she tries to down-play you and pretend that she doesnt know you
[QUOTE=Repulsion;37462974]I'm in a hilariously awkward social scene right now. I just moved to a new city (san antonio) from new mexico, I'm in highschool (9th grade) and I know absolutely nobody. Lunches are terribly awkward, I just sit by myself among the also hilariously crowded lunches. I know it's only the third day, but that doesn't make me feel any less weird. I feel like a round piece in a jigsaw puzzle. I talk to people in my periods but nothing really happens other than that.[/QUOTE] San Antonio? ouch. Sorry to hear that bro.
[QUOTE=Repulsion;37462974]I'm in a hilariously awkward social scene right now. I just moved to a new city (san antonio) from new mexico, I'm in highschool (9th grade) and I know absolutely nobody. Lunches are terribly awkward, I just sit by myself among the also hilariously crowded lunches. I know it's only the third day, but that doesn't make me feel any less weird. I feel like a round piece in a jigsaw puzzle. I talk to people in my periods but nothing really happens other than that.[/QUOTE] I moved from a rural area to the city for my high school career, so I was in the same boat. You'll make friends if you go to orientation stuff they have the first month and talk to people in your classes, but you have to make it happen yourself. Opportunities won't last forever. Be [i]really[/i] forward - ask for phone numbers when you can and text said phone numbers to hang out. That's the only way stuff will happen; nobody in your class that you small-talk with will say "Hey, repulsion, want to go to a crazy party tonight?" By the way, have standards for friends. In high school for the first two and a half years, I had a group of friends that were far greasier than anyone I've ever seen otherwise. This one kid admitted to not washing his hair in the last year, and another often printed off hentai or kept it on his phone and flashed random people that came in the room we ate lunch in or in the halls. Another shouted memes [b]really[/b] loudly every five seconds and looked like he was 12, and another was quite overweight and never closed his mouth, resulting in bad breath stank whenever he was around. You get the picture. At first it was fine; I know you're thinking "I'll never be that guy", but we were just kids that watched Futurama on dvd during lunches in the art room. I didn't know anyone was that messed up, so I chilled with them. They seemed average. I wasn't exactly high on confidence, so it worked. Over time, they became more and more disgusting (I say that lightly), what with doing things like discovering really weird porn and 4chan and what have you at the age of 14-15. I was pretty much the most popular guy there, and that's really not saying much. I just chilled on the computers in the art room, playing on miniclip, in a little bubble of unhealthy and absolutely disgusting friends, for 2.5 years. Never asked anyone out, never went to any school events, I don't think I ever held a coherent conversation with a girl (which continued through high school). One point, halfway through grade 11, I just got up and left because I had an epiphany of how absolutely shit it was, and how if I didn't get out, I'd never have any other friends. Blocked them from facebook, deleted phone numbers, never spoke again. A week later, a bunch of them got suspended for a week for looking up necrophilia hentai on one of the computers in there. Figures. I mean sure, in my last 1.5 years of high school, I made 4-5 friends, but still - what a waste of time. Pick your friends wisely. I still have one guy on facebook that hung out there occasionally (read: he was just there maybe a quarter of all lunches). Here's some recent quality posts. [t]http://puu.sh/10dB6[/t][t]http://puu.sh/10dCw[/t][t]http://puu.sh/10dEa[/t][t]http://puu.sh/10dGy[/t][t]http://puu.sh/10dKc[/t]
[QUOTE=areolop;37463063]What makes it more awkward is that she tries to down-play you and pretend that she doesnt know you[/QUOTE] what would you have preferred? "hey remember me? we dated for a while and then i broke your heart! how it's going?"
[QUOTE=Rhenae;37459578]People party too much their first year, rather than focus on studies. Not getting a job once your in college/uni seems a little extreme. It wouldn't interfere as much I would think. I guess it depends on the person.[/QUOTE] I mean just for the first year. Here people get fucked the first year because it's a big step up from high school and because the freshman classes are designed to make people leave so that only the serious students stick around in that major.
[QUOTE=Rhenae;37459578]People party too much their first year, rather than focus on studies. Not getting a job once your in college/uni seems a little extreme. It wouldn't interfere as much I would think. I guess it depends on the person.[/QUOTE] i don't think that's the issue. in the first year of college you're still getting used to how different it is from high school and forming good study habits. in my first semester i ended up getting a c in chem because i didn't understand that "extra credit" means "fucking do it" and i dropped two letter grades to a 79.5% because i got a d on my final.
You know what this is unrelated to all these other posts, but in relation to my post on the last page. I just sort of wrote down my feelings and now I feel better about it. Everyone should keep a diary. When you have to write stuff down, because it's not for an audience you consider whether you're deceiving yourself, and wonder what you really think, i.e. are you going to be self loathing or realistic? I think that helps. It doesn't make the situation any better but you feel better about yourself. I think when something bad has happened people might spend too long considering how many fucks to give (0, to spite them?) and then try and adhere to that before deciding what they even think about it. Re: partying at the first year of college. Chances are if you don't plan on doing it it'll just happen organically. As long as you don't go over the top there's nothing wrong with that, a little foresight goes a long way. I spent most of last year (2nd year) smoking weed, and that did not pan out well, because that's pretty much all I did, and that was a consequence of not setting myself a little boundary beforehand.
[QUOTE=JenkinsJ;37463733]You know what this is unrelated to all these other posts, but in relation to my post on the last page. I just sort of wrote down my feelings and now I feel better about it. Everyone should keep a diary. When you have to write stuff down, because it's not for an audience you consider whether you're deceiving yourself, and wonder what you really think, i.e. are you going to be self loathing or realistic? I think that helps. It doesn't make the situation any better but you feel better about yourself. I think when something bad has happened people might spend too long considering how many fucks to give (0, to spite them?) and then try and adhere to that before deciding what they even think about it. [/QUOTE] This is why I keep an un-published blog on my computer. Filled with thoughts, logs, and otherwise feelings about what the fuck happened.
there should be a rating for "i have no idea what you're saying"
So there's this girl I met last year, we became friends and all, but now this year it seems like we don't know each other. Whenever I see her, she doesn't really give much of a reaction, She only glances and acts like she doesn't know me. I try to talk to her but I never have the opportunity. Am I bothering her?
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;37463773]there should be a rating for "i have no idea what you're saying"[/QUOTE] "Informative"
[QUOTE=Repulsion;37462974]I'm in a hilariously awkward social scene right now. I just moved to a new city (san antonio) from new mexico, I'm in highschool (9th grade) and I know absolutely nobody. Lunches are terribly awkward, I just sit by myself among the also hilariously crowded lunches. I know it's only the third day, but that doesn't make me feel any less weird. I feel like a round piece in a jigsaw puzzle. I talk to people in my periods but nothing really happens other than that.[/QUOTE] whoa whoa whoa whoa san antonio, texas, yes?
To the guy on the last page talking about a girl he liked who says she is asexual. I'm not saying I can at all judge her, nor the situation fully, but It sounds a little to me like she is going through a phase, going from calling yourself bi to asexual is a bit of a flip flop. Seems a bit more to me like she is experimenting with her sexuality. She sounds to me a bit like she just is uncomfortable with sex, and so has decided she doesn't like it and is asexual. Also maybe a little like she is toying with her sexuality to be special. It isnt a unique behaviour with girls, i've seen it a lot during highschool. But again, I dunno how old you or this girl is or anything else about it for that matter. Just the impression I get.
[QUOTE=Rhenae;37464240]To the guy on the last page talking about a girl he liked who says she is asexual. I'm not saying I can at all judge her, nor the situation fully, but It sounds a little to me like she is going through a phase, going from calling yourself bi to asexual is a bit of a flip flop. Seems a bit more to me like she is experimenting with her sexuality. She sounds to me a bit like she just is uncomfortable with sex, and so has decided she doesn't like it and is asexual. Also maybe a little like she is toying with her sexuality to be special. It isnt a unique behaviour with girls, i've seen it a lot during highschool. But again, I dunno how old you or this girl is or anything else about it for that matter. Just the impression I get.[/QUOTE] If only, eh? Naw she's 21, and I asked her about it, why now etc, and what about past boyfriends and things. She explained and pretty much everything was present and accounted for. I'd considered everything you'd said and more when I was asking about it because I didn't want it to be true. But it is, which is shit but there's no point getting too upset about things that didn't happen. Sure I wasted some of my time, but tomorrow is a new day that isn't based on me thinking things are going to happen with this girl and I'm looking forward to it. Maybe (probably) I'll spend it sulking and eating cereals but maybe Mrs Right will be right around the corner!
[QUOTE=Rhenae;37464240]To the guy on the last page talking about a girl he liked who says she is asexual. I'm not saying I can at all judge her, nor the situation fully, but It sounds a little to me like she is going through a phase, going from calling yourself bi to asexual is a bit of a flip flop. Seems a bit more to me like she is experimenting with her sexuality. She sounds to me a bit like she just is uncomfortable with sex, and so has decided she doesn't like it and is asexual. Also maybe a little like she is toying with her sexuality to be special. It isnt a unique behaviour with girls, i've seen it a lot during highschool. But again, I dunno how old you or this girl is or anything else about it for that matter. Just the impression I get.[/QUOTE] The girl I am looking to date says she Bisexual... and im ok with this. I'm not one to judge her but all is well with that shit. (and her 'girlfriend' is pretty cool. and hot)
'girlfriend' or girlfriend?
[QUOTE=Disseminate;37464534]'girlfriend' or girlfriend?[/QUOTE] 'girlfriend' since its not FB official. :v: and the other girl has a bf too [editline]30th August 2012[/editline] that means shes still game, right?
My girlfriend is pansexual, only thing that seems notable about her not being straight is that we both talk about hot girls when we go out. Like yesterday we talked about the boobs of the girl who sold us our tickets during the movie ads.
liking boobs isn't exlusive to gay/bi chicks everybody loves boobs
i don't i'm more of an ankle man
[QUOTE=thisispain;37464739]i don't i'm more of an ankle man[/QUOTE] I wonder if they used to call ankles "A pair" and had nicknames for them like we do for boobs today. Like "She's got a nice pair ain't she" about a girls ankles.
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