Situation: Work "Christmas" party.
Co-Worker: *Talking about alcoholism and how he is no longer addicted*
me: Speaking of.... *Grabs shot*
Everyone: What the fuck lmao
Co-worker: Damn son
me: Im sorry that was actually really fucked up
him: take the shot
me: Nah Im actually good
him: Take it.
Me: okay... *reaches for drink*
him: Take it and youre gonna be like rudolph the red nosed reindeer
Me: ....Second thought and Im going to pass then
everyone around us: *Too stoned or drunk to understand* Wait what?
him: No one gets that other than him? Ffs guys here at least this guy gets it... *Splits shot in half* that looks about right, are you driving?
me: No I don't drive
him: Oh in that case Idgaf bottoms up
Sometimes I get a little racist and tell racist or sexist jokes depending on who I'm drunk with. Either way once I'm shitfaced I'm usually a happy drunk and I talk like 50x more than I normally do. :v:
sometimes when i drink i get a headache haha i'm so crazy
I usually do something horrid like eat dangerous chemicals or stab myself twice in the face
one time I ate an ounce of hop pellets and I couldn't taste anything for the rest of the night
Nothing
I never drink
Make a moan signifying my refreshment, then put the glass of water back onto the counter.
Apparently I talk nonstop, but last time I got drunk was 1st year college and to stop me from talking, my girlfriend kept shoving cookies in my mouth.
Drank a lot of OJ before sleep and avoided a hangover perfectly fresh in the morning.
Once I was intoxicated and a party and starting explaining to a girl how private torrent trackers work and why I'm not morally opposed to them.
i donated my neighbor's organs
I stream dumb games to my friends.
I drunk text, like really badly. I also spammed a Discord I was in with my drunk shit. I'm too embarrassed to even look at my message history when this happens.
[editline]20th December 2016[/editline]
I also smoke. The only times I've smoked was when I was really fucking drunk so I still have no idea what cigarettes are really like.
When drunk I lose all desire to speak English. This leads to great confusion when my friend only understands English and has to go off vague hand movements and intonation.
[QUOTE=helifreak;51554265]When drunk I lose all desire to speak English. This leads to great confusion when my friend only understands English and has to go off vague hand movements and intonation.[/QUOTE]
what do you speak then
[editline]20th December 2016[/editline]
oh wait I just got it, you speak drunk
[QUOTE=Headhumpy;51554269]what do you speak then
[editline]20th December 2016[/editline]
oh wait I just got it, you speak drunk[/QUOTE]
No I speak Japanese, my friend is a faggot so he knows a couple of words. I'm sure if I just spurted out a tits mid sentence he'd understand.
once i woke up on my porch wearing pants i wasn't wearing when i started drinking. they had mud on the legs so i don't know where i went. also couldn't find my glasses for like 2 hours
[QUOTE=helifreak;51554424]No I speak Japanese, my friend is a faggot so he knows a couple of words. I'm sure if I just spurted out a tits mid sentence he'd understand.[/QUOTE]
wow what a weeb
when I'm drunk my mind decides it's time to do dumbass stunts like cannonball into a pool in 20 degree weather kind of dumb.
[QUOTE=Rocko's;51554718]when I'm drunk my mind decides it's time to do dumbass stunts like cannonball into a pool in 20 degree weather kind of dumb.[/QUOTE]
20 degrees is pretty warm though
[editline]20th December 2016[/editline]
oh you mean 20 burger degrees, my bad
[QUOTE=JasonChang55;51553567]Situation: Work "Christmas" party.
Co-Worker: *Talking about alcoholism and how he is no longer addicted*
me: Speaking of.... *Grabs shot*
Everyone: What the fuck lmao
Co-worker: Damn son
me: Im sorry that was actually really fucked up
him: take the shot
me: Nah Im actually good
him: Take it.
Me: okay... *reaches for drink*
him: Take it and youre gonna be like rudolph the red nosed reindeer
Me: ....Second thought and Im going to pass then
everyone around us: *Too stoned or drunk to understand* Wait what?
him: No one gets that other than him? Ffs guys here at least this guy gets it... *Splits shot in half* that looks about right, are you driving?
me: No I don't drive
him: Oh in that case Idgaf bottoms up[/QUOTE]
I bought a ticket to the carribean isles when drunk and became marooned ona island
I tend to fuck my friends, but I think everyone does that at one time or another.
I dance
"Oh but limey that's not fucked up" [I]have you seen me dance[/I]
Knocked back ~20 shots of either Aristocrat or Bowman's over the course of an hour, did the whip and nae nae on my neighbor's coffee table, and threw up one time
I've since gained the ability to knock back shots without throwing up or waking up hung over, but I still can't dance and all I ever drink anymore is beer which makes me a fuckin bitch
Knew a guy whose party trick was eating lit cigarettes
Used to have the bizarre tendency to sing the Soviet national anthem when really drunk. Can't remember when I ever learned the words to it, and it baffled a Russian friend of mine to no end that I knew them when he didn't.
called the police for no reason.
I get adventurous, last time, about a month or two ago me and my mates ended up climbing in a windmill at 4 in the morning. I don't think we stayed in it for long but it was good fun.
[QUOTE=Sgt Doom;51555643]Used to have the bizarre tendency to sing the Soviet national anthem when really drunk. Can't remember when I ever learned the words to it, and it baffled a Russian friend of mine to no end that I knew them when he didn't.[/QUOTE]
Do you still know it when you're sober?
[QUOTE=Lolkork;51555971]i get tired and go to bed.[/QUOTE]
You gotta drink it faster
[QUOTE=Ldesu;51555968]Do you still know it when you're sober?[/QUOTE]Little bits here and there.
I fell into a gorilla enclosure once, they had to kill the gorilla
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