I shit in the cat's litterbox and blame them for 12" turds
Fap.
I flail around the room trying to reenact what I see on TV whenever I see a martial arts movie and nobody else is around. I also sit back in my chair and narrate people's posts like they have some sort of speech impediment and have debates with myself.
I live alone so I've made it in the Guiness book of world records for fapping the most times in a day
I pace back and forth over and over and over and fascinate myself just by doing that.
While doing so I go over things that have happened in the past. If it was funny, even if it happened many months ago, I'll laugh about it, then repeat it in my head once more, and laugh again.
Or, I might think about a beneficial social interaction I had: something I said or did in public that generated a very positive reaction. I'll re-enact my role in that situation over and over, isolating the moment of action and repeating it. "Sebum. Sebaceous gland. Skin. Sebum. Sebaceous gland. Skin. Sebum. Sebaceous gland. Skin. Sebum. Sebaceous gland. Skin."
Fap in ~freaky~ ways
Mix a shitload of food together until I get an abomination which should have never been created, then eat it
...Sometimes I piss in a cup and drink it.
I stare at my foot and think
Fap with my door open.
I relax, at least for a little while.
Stare at a wall and imagine some of the most awesome ideas ever.... that I will never get to do :(
Playing with my cat.
I dress up in my sister's clothes.
Talk to my dog.
Think out loud.
Walk around and imagine stuff.
Play loud music or games.
Watch what little TV that still interests me.
I think of various scenarios and enact them. (Like what would happen if I were a cage fighter, or if I was approached by those "walkin' wit mah tits" dudes)
If I'm working out with my kickbag and nobody's around I often insult it's mother
SWEARING RATHER LOUDLY AT MY VIDEO GAMES
Turn the volume up and dance hilariously bad.
I remember I used to record myself fapping.
Nowadays I don't. The recording, anyway.
[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HhSjwU8gEsI[/media]
I put this on and move my hips in a circular, erotic fashion
Sing really loudly in a really high falsetto.
Find a bottle and pour things in it.
Like baking soda, vinegar, tooth paste, syrup and shit like that.
Then furiously shake it, and throw it out the window.
When I'm alone in the car I have exaggerated road rage
"OH MY GOOOD MOVE MOTHAFUCKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
Yell at people angrily over a game/skype
spend the entire day naked
speak to myself in russian, yell random things as loud as i can, turn my guitar amp to 11
Sometimes, I blind all my curtains and go into night mode. Other times, I just open all of them and keep the house as bright as possible.
Practice my repertoire as loud as possible. Oh, and play coop games while using mic, saying obscene things to my friends.
Dress up in airsoft gear sometimes :suicide:
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