Close calls you had - General

Post whatever you avoided at unexpected events. Being from evading from getting trouble to that combine that almost turned you into canned goods. Mine was recently ago. Being the boy who can't get enough internets, I grabed my dads iPad and went downstairs to my room. On the way to my room, my dads girlfriend (?) was in my room and when I noticed before she turned around, I chucked the iPad to the couch and she, lucky, didn't notice the movement and noted to me about my Mt. Tissue (bad runny nose) and went back upstairs. I grabed the iPad and here I am.

I'm so confuse. Anyways, I was about to get Gaddafi'd by my constantly high 420 erryday friend. He was going to use scissors, and right as we was about to do my dur, I kicked my foot up subconciously, smashing his nose. Thankfully, it prevented my Gaddafi.

At a bonfire with some friends some idiot decided to throw some boxes of fireworks into the fire (assuming they were all used and trash). Well, no, you fucking idiot. The next thing I know there's a bottle rocket exploding on my chest and fountains are going off everywhere. Chances are not much people here have been shot at, but having bottle rockets and [i]weeping fucking willows[/i] flying by your head - yeah, it's like getting shot at. I almsot died. People almost died. We were all circled around the fire and it just turned into absolute chaos.

[QUOTE=zacht_180;35974000]At a bonfire with some friends some idiot decided to throw some boxes of fireworks into the fire (assuming they were all used and trash). Well, no, you fucking idiot. The next thing I know there's a bottle rocket exploding on my chest and fountains are going off everywhere. Chances are not much people here have been shot at, but having bottle rockets and [i]weeping fucking willows[/i] flying by your head - yeah, it's like getting shot at. I almsot died. People almost died. We were all circled around the fire and it just turned into absolute chaos.[/QUOTE] Wow, you just saw death man.

[QUOTE=zacht_180;35974000]At a bonfire with some friends some idiot decided to throw some boxes of fireworks into the fire (assuming they were all used and trash). Well, no, you fucking idiot. The next thing I know there's a bottle rocket exploding on my chest and fountains are going off everywhere. Chances are not much people here have been shot at, but having bottle rockets and [i]weeping fucking willows[/i] flying by your head - yeah, it's like getting shot at. I almsot died. People almost died. We were all circled around the fire and it just turned into absolute chaos.[/QUOTE] Did you guys beat that idiot up?

[QUOTE=John Egbert;35974129]Did you guys beat that idiot up?[/QUOTE] Fuck a beating, hit him with a truck. [I]Or is it overkill?[/I]

It's never overkill with an idiot like that. Close call: I went karting with some friends and the circuit was horrible (Lot's of holes and the curbs were tires half in the ground. Anyway, I went to overtake my mate and I hit a hole, Causing me to kind of go in a slip. I just had it but went for the tires. The kart rolled over, I flew out (no seatbelts, Just what the fuck) and the kart was still going, But it turned to me at full speed. The fucker almost hit my head if it wasn't for me jumping on my feet and running like fuck. Holy hell, I was scared shitless.

Still remember it to this day. I was 5, and was playing in the park with some friends. We decided to play hide and seek, and I was picked to seek. After doing my best to count to 30, I ran towards the road, not knowing that 11-12 people on bicycles were riding towards me. They didn't see me until it was too late. Got hit by a bike and sent to the ground, before I got run over my leg. So I hunched myself to cover that leg, weeping and shit. Guess what, one second later, one of the bikes passed right at the spot where my head was when I first got hit. If my grandmother saw that spectacle she would call it a divine intervention.

I got stabbed in the head by a stick. I was around 4, I had some little plastic pushbike and I rode it down some passageway in South Africa. BLAM, a twig got into my head when I fell into the side of the vegetation. I have the scar and a tiny bald spot so I can't forget that.

I almost stepped on a ladybug today :(

pubic hair caught in zipper... Shit buzz!

I almost drowned when I was 4...I think

Last year i decided to chuck a wank in my garage and then my brother and his friend decided to come back to my house and my brother had the garage door remote so i quickly closed the browser, out my dick back in my pants and ran through the back door of the garage just as my brother opened the garage door, luckily i wasn't caught spanking the monkey by my brother and his friend

Jumped into the 6 foot end of a pool when I was a kid. Almost fucking died until I doggy paddled and grabbed onto my uncle's back. More recently, I was almost shot in San Francisco. Was on the same street as the shooters and victim, but luckily I didn't get in their way and they all just ran past me.

I was walking home from school and number two was on its way. had to hurry. as i sat on the toilet it came out!

I was on a pretty old bike, so the rubber on the handlebars was worn out and the side was just a sharp metal circle. anyway, I was at a place with a whole bunch of bike jumps, built up a lot of speed and went up the steepest one. I flipped mid air and landed hard on the ground. The bike landed right on top of me, the handlebar about 2 inches from my head, and the petal landed about 5 inches from my side. The bike wasn't even touching me, it was sitting right above me. I don't want to know what would have happened if the handlebar smashed me right in the head.

Stepped on a hornets nest... When I was allergic to bees. But I survived amd somehow the allergy vanished a few years afterwards.

[QUOTE=Xieneus;35976665]Stepped on a hornets nest... When I was allergic to bees. But I survived amd somehow the allergy vanished a few years afterwards.[/QUOTE] You're now a super hero. I was biking home from school one day and the train barriers in my town are a bit dodgy, always getting stuck and shit, but as i was biking up to them they were down and they rose just as I approached so i didn't stop and just kept on biking like any normal person would do. Turns out the train they were down for hadn't actually gone past yet and the barriers had malfunctioned and risen without my knowledge. I had headphones in so the outside world was pretty muffled but as i finish crossing the tracks I hear a friend call my name so i take my headphones out and i can hear the train going past and my friend tells me of how close i was. Got called up about it in school after the train networks got into contact with the school to identify me from the CCTV, they showed me the tape and holy fucking jesus I was only about 10ft passed the tracks when the train came flying by at 85mph... The train network said they wouldn't press charges (its illegal to go on crossings when the barriers are down) due to the malfunction.

My friend called me and I was right behind him, what an idiot.

Went to the movies with my family to watch Ice Age. I ran towards my friend who was some feet infront of me and right after I stopped running and started walking normally a huge fucking ice block went straight behind my head leaving my hair a little wet. The ice block was made of snow which stayed on the roof getting more and more compromised and dense for everyday.

[QUOTE=tom1029;35977647]My friend called me and I was right behind him, what an idiot.[/QUOTE] That happened to me today, pretty much. Me and two friends were waiting at this pizza place for a fourth guy to arrive. We had all ordered just a minute ago. One of my friends decides to call the absent friend to make sure he was coming and just as he calls him, he steps in through the door :v:

Had a "ice Fight" which consisted of throwing large lumps of ice at each other just outside a pub last winter in England. Long start short one of these massive lumps of frozen water missed my friends but cut his eat clean open. we we're lucky..

I ran over a baby.

i had a couple times where I almost shit myself. Made it to the toilet just in time, though. Had one where it exploded out right as I sat down. If that's not a close call, I don't know what is.

I remember this kid who was in baseball threw a fucking baseball at my face from like 5 or 6 feet away. Luckily, I dodged it. It was weird, i felt time go fast and slow at the same time. He had to get his wall replaced. [editline]16th May 2012[/editline] [QUOTE=flame.james;35976269]Last year i decided to chuck a wank in my garage and then my brother and his friend decided to come back to my house and my brother had the garage door remote so i quickly closed the browser, out my dick back in my pants and ran through the back door of the garage just as my brother opened the garage door, luckily i wasn't caught spanking the monkey by my brother and his friend[/QUOTE] Yo dick is just TOO FAST!!

I survived a car crash when i was 14. It like, tipped over and rolled off the road. You know, cliff highway sort of things? The car slid off the road and landed in a heap at the bottom. My Mum died a week later from her injuries. Other than that, i've almost drowned a few times.

I have many stories of close calls, One time when I was like 4, I think, I almost got bitten by a rattlesnake. When I was 7 I was almost hit by a drunk driver. When I was 13 I was almost killed in a car accident. I'm pretty damned lucky

At the age of 11, I was taken by my mom to the stables to get my sister. She went to where my sister was and I saw a snowman beside a house. I went to take a closer look at it and when I arrived to it, I heard some rumbling noise. The next thing I know I got buried in snow that fell down from the ceiling with icicles sharp as a damn kitchen knife almost piercing my brain. I got a scar from it. And at the age of 12, I almost got chocked to death by some local drunk.

When I was 4 I was playing with a rope connected to my window, and somehow it ended up tangled around my throat. i was on my bed, and I slipped and it jerked against my neck, and I could hardly make a sound. my brother happened to walk in there after about 20 seconds, I blacked out for a bit, would've died if no one came in there.

Almost gut hit by an 18 Wheeler about a year ago, came tearing around a bend as I was crossing, missed by about a foot or so. Those things obliterate Kangaroos on the highway when they hit, I wouldn't have fared much better. When I was 15, my cables weren't connected and I faced sterility, luckily got an operation and replaced my relays. That's enough alliteration I think. Almost got mauled by a blue heeler dog when I was 7, thing was massive and rabid, could easily have killed me. And when I was 1, my Mum, 3 year old sister and 9 year old brother were attacked by 3 pit bulls. According to the story, they circled like sharks and took half a dozen people to drive them off.