Knock Knock,
Who's there?
9/11
9/11 who?
Dude. You said you would never forget.
Why does waldo wear a stripped shirt, because he doesn't want to be spotted.
What do you call a fly without wings
[sp]A walk[/sp]
Why is Jake afraid of opening the fridge?
[sp]Because he saw the salad dressing[/sp]
Why did the chicken cross the road?
[sp]No clue[/sp]
A jewish man with an erection bumps into a wall
[sp]He hurts his nose[/sp]
You have so many posts on your Facebook, you could make a fence!
An scot, a welshman and an englishman walk into a bar, the bartender asks
"what is this somekind of joke?"
everytime I've told this joke, fucking nothing
one time there were genuinely crickets
why is 6 afraid of 7?
because 7, 8, 9.
[QUOTE=KlaseR;40662839]why is 6 afraid of 7?
because 7, 8, 9.[/QUOTE]
that is not even funny anymore
Any "That's what she said joke". They're never bad.
[QUOTE=cyclocius;40663209]Any "That's what she said joke". They're never bad.[/QUOTE]
Not always, there's bad ones, but i still lost my shit when Moxxi did it in Bl2, didn't expect it at all.
[QUOTE=kaze4159;40662642]What do you call a fly without wings
[sp]A walk[/sp][/QUOTE]
What do you call a fly without wings or legs?
[sp]A raisin.[/sp]
So a hobo walks into a bar. He asks the bartender for a toothpick
The bartender doesn't ask questions and lend him a toothpick. The hobo leaves
Moments later, 2 other hobos enter and ask for toothpicks
Again, the bartender lends them a toothpick each, but this time he's getting puzzled
Later again, a 4th hobo gets in, but this time he asks for a straw
The bartender then asks "There are 3 other hobos that asked for toothpicks, you ask for a straw. Why?"
The hobo replies "One of your customers puked outside and the other 3 got the best"
[QUOTE=cyclocius;40663209]Any "That's what she said joke". They're never bad.[/QUOTE]
Thats what she said
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
[sp]No idea[/sp]
What do you call a deer with no eyes or legs?
[sp]Still no idea[/sp]
[QUOTE=LittleBabyman;40663121]that is not even funny anymore[/QUOTE]
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
[sp]because seven was a registered six offender[/sp]
So I was thinking of a joke, but I couldn't think of a punchline.
What did the ocean say to the other ocean?
Nothing, they just waved.
Why are pirates pirates?
[sp]Because they arrrrr.[/sp]
Why are pirates so fit?
[sp]Arrrr, Gym lad.[/sp]
[editline]16th May 2013[/editline]
How does Bob Marley like his doughnuts?
[sp]With Jam in.[/sp]
How does Bob Marley's back up band like their dougnuts?
[sp]I don't know but I hope they like Jam in too.[/sp]
Why spy did cross the road?
[sp] He never really was on this side[/sp]
It's old joke though.
What's long, brown and sticky?
[sp]A stick.[/sp]
Why don't cannibals like to eat clowns?
[sp]Because they taste funny.[/sp]
What's black, white, and red all over?
[sp]A newspaper[/sp]
Alternative punchline:
[sp]A sun burned penguin[/sp]
A man walks into a bar in Ireland and asks the bartender, "What's the quickest way to get to Dublin?" The bartender replies, "Well, are ye walkin' or drivin'?" The man says, "I'm driving," to which the bartender replies [sp]"Well that's the quickest way."[/sp]
What did batman say to robin before he got in the car
[sp]Robin, get in the car[/sp]
[QUOTE=matt.ant;40667611]What's black, white, and red all over?
[sp]A newspaper[/sp]
Alternative punchline:
[sp]A sun burned penguin[/sp][/QUOTE]
I always preferred "A nun falling down the stairs."
[QUOTE=Metashotzo;40667756]I always preferred "A nun falling down the stairs."[/QUOTE]
"Zebras on the Discovery Channel"
How do you fit an elephant in a match box?
[sp] Take the matches out[/sp]
How do you fit a lion in a match box?
[sp]Take the elephant out[/sp]
snip
A nun was kicked out of her church for always looking scruffy
[sp]Moral of the story is don't get into bad habits[/sp]
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