• Most Embarrassing Moments
    36 replies, posted
Alright, let's hear about those times when all that was going through your mind was "oh dear god, please kill me," those moments where you are so embarrassed, you wish you were all alone. Mine goes back to third grade. I was in math class. For the past week or so, I had the shits (some sort of stomach bug, can't remember what it's called.) Anyways, I didn't really want to get up and go to the bathroom, because the teacher was mean about letting kids use the classroom when he was teaching. Anyways, I really felt like I had to shit, but I put it off so I wouldn't get yelled at. All of a sudden I had an urge to sneeze, and then I sneezed. With that sneeze came a loosening of my bowels and a really loud, wet fart. I shit my pants, and it wasn't solid either. Everything went quiet and everyone was staring at me, I get all red, start crying, and run to the bathroom, shit dribbling down my pants legs. I ended up getting sent home that day. Surprisingly enough, I was lucky and people forgot about it after about a month, but yeah, it was seriously humiliating and I never wait to use the bathroom again.
I spent my high school year in the southwest of Arkansas, right in the bottom corner. The reason I pointed that out is because the southwest corner of Arkansas is boring as shit. Being boring as shit, we would ride backgrounds and drink. I know there's little excuse for this, but we all lived on the relatively same backroad, which was conveniently placed next to a bootleg liquor store that didn't check IDs. Anyways, one of the main areas to alleviate boredom was a part of a river called "Stallion Ford", a rocky beach by the side of the river. Around 2am, me and 7 other senior friends, an even number of boys and girls, went down there drunk as shit in my truck. Everyone wondered what we could do, and I suggested skinny dipping jokingly. Everyone agreed on it. So, we leave all our clothes in my truck, and walk out into the water. We're having a great time fucking about, swinging from ropes into the water and whatnot, when suddenly we see some lights approaching the river. We quickly retreat to neck-high waters, to find it was a shitload of 6th-7th grade kids. One of them was my best friend's little brother, who was an asshole. They swarm around us in the river, engaging in conversation, unknowing that we were completely naked. My best friend's little brother, who is an asshole dickbag, tries to play a joke and punch me in the nuts. He actually full-grasped my penis. In shock, I stood up, revealing my nudies to 6th-7th grade kid around the river. Upon seeing this, my entire group of friends got up with me, ran to my truck, and we sped to my house immediately to change. Considering our school is startingly small, we all had to put up with shit about that night until we moved to college.
[QUOTE=Water-Marine;43528490]I spent my high school year in the southwest of Arkansas, right in the bottom corner. The reason I pointed that out is because the southwest corner of Arkansas is boring as shit. Being boring as shit, we would ride backgrounds and drink. I know there's little excuse for this, but we all lived on the relatively same backroad, which was conveniently placed next to a bootleg liquor store that didn't check IDs. Anyways, one of the main areas to alleviate boredom was a part of a river called "Stallion Ford", a rocky beach by the side of the river. Around 2am, me and 7 other senior friends, an even number of boys and girls, went down there drunk as shit in my truck. Everyone wondered what we could do, and I suggested skinny dipping jokingly. Everyone agreed on it. So, we leave all our clothes in my truck, and walk out into the water. We're having a great time fucking about, swinging from ropes into the water and whatnot, when suddenly we see some lights approaching the river. We quickly retreat to neck-high waters, to find it was a shitload of 6th-7th grade kids. One of them was my best friend's little brother, who was an asshole. They swarm around us in the river, engaging in conversation, unknowing that we were completely naked. My best friend's little brother, who is an asshole dickbag, tries to play a joke and punch me in the nuts. He actually full-grasped my penis. In shock, I stood up, revealing my nudies to 6th-7th grade kid around the river. Upon seeing this, my entire group of friends got up with me, ran to my truck, and we sped to my house immediately to change. Considering our school is startingly small, we all had to put up with shit about that night until we moved to college.[/QUOTE] But how did you stand up in neck high water? Also what are a group of 6th-7th graders doing out on an old dark backroad at 2 am by themselves? Answer my questions, I am an internet detective pls.
In my Junior year of high school some friends and I were joking at lunch and I accidentally yelled something loud which included the word "nigger" for some reason (I can't even remember what it was or why) right as our vice-principal was walking by the table.
When I was in the third grade, our class went on an overnight field trip to walk around in the tropical rain forests of Costa Rica. We stayed at this awesome hotel with a swimming pool. Me and my friends were messing around near the pool, when this kid, Tyler, tries tripping me as a joke. In response, I immediately turned around and shoved him into the direction of the pool. He hit the very edge of the pool and started struggling to regain his balance, but it was too late. He began to fall backwards, but in one last effort to prevent himself from falling into the pool, he tried reaching out to one of our classmates, Christina, to have something to grab onto. Unfortunately for him, he didn't grab her shoulder or her arm, but her bikini. It ripped off instantly as he fell backwards into the pool. I quickly turned around and started fast-walking away from the scene with my friends as Christina's screams filled the night air. I was scared/embarrassed as hell. Me and my friends his behind a corner. They were all like, "Brad, you're in so much trouble, dude.", as they attempted to keep their laughter's volume down. I decided to just face the music and confront the problem, so I walked back to the scene, where Tyler was being scolded by the teacher as Christina stood behind her with her arms across her chest. Tyler looked at me, looked back at the teacher, but said nothing. He took the entirety of the blame. [I]Sucker.[/I]
Reposting. [QUOTE=MazerRackham;42868995]I'd been dating my girlfriend of 8 years for less than a month when she invited me to a friends 21st birthday party. Her friend was a massive MASH fan so the party was themed after that. Being a fearless red-blooded male I immediately resolved to dress as Corporal Klinger, and borrowed a gold cocktail dress and feather boa combo from my girlfriends sister (tall girl), my girlfriend threw on a straw hat and a dressing gown and we waltzed into that place arm in arm like the most mismatched prostitute/john combo in history. Unfortunately, the birthday girl was clearly the only person there who had ever seen an episode of MASH. There wasn't a single thing in that party that was related to MASH, everything was camoflauge netting and war-paint and machine guns. So I spent the night in my sparkly figure hugging dress being stared down by a group of rough-as-guts rednecks all dressed as Rambo, who just didn't get the reference.[/QUOTE]
My secondary (high) school used to have a summer play scheme that kids from around the island would attend for all sorts of activities. On the first day we all had to be registered and sorted into our respective activity groups, and I was paired with my ex-girlfriend and a bunch of other girls because I was the only male to choose pottery lessons. Now I was tiny as a kid (around 13 years old here, they were older than me) and I loved my massive back-pack, it was the size of my entire back, neck to butt. Now grouped with these girls and being a shy kid they were just teasing me and asking me silly question but I lapped it all up. They were all laughing (even I was because some of the shit they were saying was quite funny) and it started getting out of hand, poking me, slapping my ass, pushing me over. They then told me to crawl on all fours across the floor and pretend to be a turtoise (hence the back-pack), and so I did. But what I didn't realize at the time is that everyone had noticed how noisy we were being and in my excitement I had crawled across half the gym hall with everyone staring at me. I was pretty embarrassed.
"heyy" she goes offline gg lol
I tripped and fell into a pool while I went to a fancy party.
[QUOTE=a dumb bear;43537831]"heyy" she goes offline gg lol[/QUOTE] take it back she replied he he
Basically, I've swore accidentally at least five times when the teacher was around. And right behind me as well, how unfortunate... So this how it goes: Me: Oh for fucks sake! Vice principle: I BEG YOUR PARDON! *runs*
Have you ever accidentally cupped a woman's breast in public?
[QUOTE=Secrios;43544130]Have you ever accidentally cupped a woman's breast in public?[/QUOTE] I accidentally cupped a teacher back in middle school. like in her 60's. was walking into the classroom and as I was going to close it (didnt look behind me, just reached for the handle) I managed to grab this womans tits in front of the entire class. man I was so confused when the "door handle" was so soft so I turned around just to see her gaping at me. ohgodd
Accidentally called a guy named Amos "anus"
Two years ago i finally got the courage to knock on my crush's door. [SP]Turns out it was the wrong door, short angry-looking man stepped out and looked as if he was going to punch me or something.[/SP]
Highschool
Me being drunk. I think the best one is when I was out drinking with my co-workers. Everyone was drinking like there was no tomorrow. I lost my memory pretty soon but this is what they tell me happened: I had some minor fights with the largest possible man in our group (naturally) and it climaxed at him ACTUALLY dragging me through a table, knocking all the shit off it. Others thought it was only possible in movies, well now they know. Needless to say, we got thrown out pretty hastily. My friend says he wants to kill himself everytime we take the same taxi home from bar. That's all I know about that. :v:
Using public bathroom stalls when you're with 1 other person So much awkward silence.
[QUOTE=Hat-Wearing Man;43548601]Using public bathroom stalls when you're with 1 other person So much awkward silence.[/QUOTE] When ever that shit happens, I usually take the stall :v: I don't want to stand next to a guy with his wang out and then to pull mine out next to him, that's just weird.
[QUOTE=Hat-Wearing Man;43548601]Using public bathroom stalls when you're with 1 other person So much awkward silence.[/QUOTE] Or when you go up or down a few floors using an elevator Even longer awkward silence
I was sat on the bus and decided to listen to some music, so I pull out my phone and listen to whatever came on first, which happened to be this: [MEDIA]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FjYZ6S0sDdA[/MEDIA] I thought my headphones were broken because everything sounded muffled; I didn't realize that as I pulled my phone out, my headphones detached and blasted the music down the bus on full volume. I didn't notice until about 30 seconds in when everyone was staring at me.
shit myself in kindergarten meh
In 4th grade, my friend (who didn't give a shit about anything to do with school, pretty much) and I were in class. There was a paper cutter at the back of the room and I thought those were the coolest things ever. I saw his quiz lying on top of it, so I thought it was meant to be ... shredded. Just to make sure, I asked him if I could chop it up and he said yes, so of course I shredded it into tiny strips. Stupid me decided to leave the strips there. Next day, teacher's walking about the classroom and sees these strips. She pieces them together and sees the guy's name, "Justin", and says "Justin, why'd you chop this up?" Whole class goes silent, his scared face turns into an angry face and shouts my name, going "Why dude?!" I was so angry, I even asked him if I could and he said [I]yes[/I] but nevertheless I was the one who chopped it up. Teacher asked me why I did it, and I said "well, he let me". Teacher (of course) replies, "Well, if he told you to jump off a bridge would you do it?" I considered a zingy response like "Well, sure, because he'd get [U]sued[/U]" but I just kept my mouth shut. Everyone looked at me like I was the bad guy and I was so sad.
so on new year, i was reminded about one incident at neighbors house so i somehow agree'd to go to their place many years ago, then back then we took few pictures of me and some enormous teddy bear (and i was like 7 or 8) i'm trying to avoid remembering that day and seeing that picture ~uhhh~
[QUOTE=Chinook249;43563198] "Well, if he told you to jump off a bridge would you do it?"[/QUOTE] I hate this qeustion/example so fucking much.
[QUOTE=Kirbyfactor;43572762]I hate this qeustion/example so fucking much.[/QUOTE] Not to mention that it doesn't even make sense in that context, his friend didn't tell him to cut up the quiz, he just said he could.
[QUOTE=Kirbyfactor;43572762]I hate this qeustion/example so fucking much.[/QUOTE] Just say yes
Back in elementary school I intentionally lost the school spelling bee. Now let me assure you that there was no competition. None of those kids had shit on me. I had won my class' preliminary with "[I]appendicitis[/I]," which basically made me invincible, but I was shy as hell. When I learned that the winner would have to participate in an inter-school spelling bee, with [I]people that I didn't know[/I], all I could think was "god forbid." I had to lose. So the day of the spelling bee came around and all of the other kids had invited their parents to come and watch them. I was all alone, because I didn't want my parents to watch me humiliate myself. The spelling bee started. I was called up to spell my first word. My homeroom teacher gave me "wealth." I just stood there for a moment thinking about how to spell it wrong. After a few seconds under pressure, I cracked and spelled the word correctly, but once I heard a clap I tacked on an "e" for "wealthe" and the crowd went silent. My teacher gave me this look and mouthed the word "what?" I went back to my chair. You could miss two words. I don't even remember the second word because by then I was just trying to hold back tears. I think I spelled it with an unnecessary 'z' or an 'x.' idk. I just know I lost. Some other kids had actually managed to lose legitimately, so when the round ended, I left the stage with them. Except, while they all went to sit with their parents, I went to sit in the corner. The winner went on to rub it in my face. My homeroom teacher went on to give me a speech about how "what I did wasn't funny" and that she was "deeply disappointed in me." All of the parents thought I was stupid. I went home and cried.
I threw a paper ball in the air and it hit my band teacher's poinsettia flower. I mixed up the words. [I]"Hey Ms. B I just smashed your Placenta."[/I]
Fell into the recycling bin that was in the class room, everyone laughed at me..
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