no funny stuff, just antihumor jokes
lets begin
-why the town buried the fireman?
because he was dead-
go!
The Holocaust
Once upon a time, there was a child.
He was beaten.
What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants at the hill?
"there are some elephants at the hill"
A man walks into a bar with an orange for a head. The bartender looks confused and asks him "Hey, why do you have an orange for a head?" The man responds, "Well, you're not gonna believe this, but there was a genie who granted me three wishes."
The bartender seems intrigued. "Well, what did you wish for?"
"Sigh, all right. First, I wished for a brand new Ferrari."
"Ok. What was the second wish?"
"Next, I wished for a beautiful wife that would love me until the day I died."
"Well, for the third wish, you obviously had to have wished you had an orange for a head, or else you wouldn't have an orange for a head."
"Well, I didn't, but it's...you know what, nevermind, it was a stupid wish."
"No, go ahead, tell me. What was the third wish?"
"...all right. For the third wish, I wish I had an orange for a head."
so, Bush gets some millions at the bank
then Barack Obama gets some millions from the bank
then Clinton gets some millions from the bank
whats the name of the movie?
"Bush,Obama and Clinton getting some millions at the bank"
There once was a thread on Facepunch.
Inside was no grammar.
how to be unfunny...
oo i know, majority of people wear clothes, drive cars and eat
Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?
[sp]To get to the other side[/sp]
OK, so a father, mother, son, daughter and a big fluffy dog go into a talent agency.
The talent agent goes "so um...what do you guys do?"
The father starts unzipping his pants, the mother takes her clothes off along with the children; soon all of them are completely naked, including the dog who takes his leash off.
The son goes down on the dog as the mother shoots oranges from her vagina. The daughter does a hand-stand, she shits all over her back and makes the dog lick it off. The wife is singing, the father opens the son's mouth and shits in it. Mostly liquid here. The father says "now we will make the fountain of youth". They all get into a circle, squat down and piss into the middle. They all take turns shitting in the middle of this circle while the kids are singing "Make em' laugh". The father takes the daughter, straps her to a chair and burns her cunt shut with lit cigarettes. "THIS IS WHAT YOU GET FOR...BEING A SLUT" he says as he cums on her flat 7 year old tits.
The son pisses in the mother's ass, they dive into the piss and shit and they all start fucking each other. The father jacks off the dog and gets his hands all covered in the grossest fucking cum you could imagine, rubs it in his son's asshole and fists it until he bleeds.
The daughter, after a long crying fit from pain, passes out. The mother gives her smelling salts to wake her up. The father says "BRING IT IN!" in which 4 men dressed as Adolf Hitler in assless panties bring in a kiddie pool filled with goat intestines and aborted fetuses. The family dine on piss and shit tacos sandwiches (on wheat bread; it's healthy for the children.). Afterward, the children are told to reenact the Titanic disaster, so they bring the dog next to them and fart "Nearer My God To Thee" in unison.
The father goes out on the handicap entrance railing and shoots himself in the head, in his last words he tells the wife to make the children watch.
Then the rest of the family goes "TADA!"
The talent agent goes "hmm...that's an interesting act; what do you call it?"
"The Aristocrats."
Unoriginal Chuck Norris joke
What is worse than finding a worm in your apple
[sp] getting raped[/sp]
[QUOTE=shatteredwindow;26211019]What is worse than finding a worm in your apple[/QUOTE]
Finding a razor in your [sp]penis.[/sp] :v:
What do you call people who are small?
Midget
[QUOTE=D0C H.;26207344]The Holocaust[/QUOTE]
The Halocaust
knock knock.
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orangeyou glad i didn't tell a joke?
Knock Knock
Whos There?
Jeremy
Ron Jeremy?
Yep.
Well come on it!
Knock Knock!
whos there?
banana.
Banana who?
Knock Knock!
whos there?
banana.
Banana who?
Knock Knock!
whos there?
banana.
Banana who?
Knock Knock!
whos there?
orange.
orange who?
[sp]to get to the other side[/sp]
An englishmen a irishmen and a scotsman walk into a bar.
They all die of liver disease.
Some day you are going to die.
why did the gay shoot a cop in the ass
[sp]to get to the other side[/sp]
*joke insulting /b/*
[editline]21st November 2010[/editline]
why did i post in this thread
[sp]Because i thought it would be fun[/sp]
There once was a thread on facepunch.
Inside was shitty anti-humor jokes.
[QUOTE=DarkOps;26214187]There once was a thread on facepunch.
Inside was shitty anti-humor jokes.[/QUOTE]
That was more of a statement than an anti-joke.
Pretty much like what this reply is.
once apoun a cuple of hours ago...... i downloaded punembra and got scared and stoped playing
a man walks into a bar
he is an alcohol and it is ruining his family
Women not getting rights
A blond walked into a bar.
No one gave a shit.
What's the best part of having alzheimer's?
[sp] To get to the other side! [/sp]
An Asian, black man, and a Mexican walk into a bar. The bartender says "Get the fuck out."
Sorry, you need to Log In to post a reply to this thread.