• Post Useless Superpowers.
    437 replies, posted
The ability to be irresistebly attractive to women while they're not looking at me. The power to read the minds of plants. The skill to remember the last anagram I read forever. The ability to shit out pennies.
Common Sense
The ability to instantly know the entire plot of any game book or movie by looking at the cover art. On the bright side, that book report won't take long.
The power to read people's minds but completely lacking an inner monologue while doing so.
After my dad's brain surgery he found himself with a pretty useless superpower. The ability to eat as much cold snacks as he can and not get a brain freeze.
the ability to give the man closest to the exact opposite side of the planet a boner on business days
The ability to ressurect dead wasps.
Super speed, but only in one leg.
invisible fingernails
The ability for your reality to become your dreams.
Smelling weather changes
The ability to turn yourself into a tree.
the ability to not get that thing where water hits your butt even when you put tissue in the toilet
The ability to shoot air from your hands. And not powerful bursts, like little breezes.
The ability to grow armpit hair.
The ability to hear the thoughts of ants but not being able to turn it off ever
[QUOTE=Magmacow358;40390897]The ability to instantly know the entire plot of any game book or movie by looking at the cover art. On the bright side, that book report won't take long.[/QUOTE] 1. Walk through library 2. Become an expert in every field of science in a matter of minutes Sounds pretty fucking useful to me
The power to absorb nutrients from food and then expel waste left over from the process out of the body
The ability to levitate, but only whilst shitting. The ability to turn 360 degrees instantly. The ability to become irresistibly attractive to plants.
The ability to lactate acid, but your nipples aren't acid proof.
The power to secrete stagnant mayonaise out of every orifice in your body
The ability to grow my hair really fast.
The ability to have the most delicious pee and poop in the world.
HINDSIGHT. [video=youtube;cqkI691dxNg]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cqkI691dxNg[/video]
ability to go super saiyan
The ability to grow hair on your nails.
Ability to follow simple directions
The ability to eat pasta. Really, really quickly. Like, you won't believe how quick. One second it's there and you'll blink and it's all gone. Poof. Magical.
The ability to, once a day, permanently lock a random door anywhere in the world.
[QUOTE=Derp Y. Mail;40391994]The ability to eat pasta. Really, really quickly. Like, you won't believe how quick. One second it's there and you'll blink and it's all gone. Poof. Magical.[/QUOTE] This, but with it comes the power of being allergic to Pasta
Sorry, you need to Log In to post a reply to this thread.