• I might meet my Father soon, Haven't seen him since I was two
    45 replies, posted
So here's the story. When I was about 2 Mama and Dada broke up, Mama got custody and moved to another country (Englang to New Zealand). The rest is history I grew up without out a Dad in New Zealand for the last 14 or so years, I turned out ok not too mentally damaged and I never really felt a need for my Dad. Then yesterday out of the blue my step dad ask's me "would you like to make contact or w=meet your real Dad?" I said yes but now I'm confused slightly. I grew up without him, I have no hard feelings against him but I also have not feelings of love towards him.Is that normal? Should I meet him? Doe's he deserve to meet me? I don't know. Has anybody here had a situation similar to this? if so please post how you handled it.
Well the feeling of no love is normal, you haven't lived/grown up around your true father for 12-13 years(?). When you meet him just act normal. I'm sure he's just as nervous to meet you as you are to meet him
lol 'Dada' :razz:
"Not too mentally damaged."
It's totally normal, you've pretty much never met him before.
Pull a George Lopez and punch him
I would, do it, you may find common intrests
[QUOTE=Hatelove;22972187]not too mentally damaged[/QUOTE] Don't worry, that'll come as you browse the Internet.
I can't think of anything funny to say, but I guess good luck.
I lost my dad at 5, and really have almost no recollection of him either, and really feel the same. I don't know about you, but I wouldn't be too reliant on what my step-dad said if he said that I could see him again. (I'm saying in context of your situation, not mine.)
Go with the flow, you might like him.
ok what i originally put was fucked up i think. so just like. go bowling with the dude
While you might not feel much for him keep in mind you're part of his flesh and blood. Even though he might not really be a father to you that doesn't change the fact that you're his son. Basically what I'm saying is even though you might feel too much, be respectful and let him bond if he wants to. If you look at it from his perspective he might feel he got his son taken away from him at the age of two.
[QUOTE=st ef you;22972455]I lost my dad at 5, and really have almost no recollection of him either, and really feel the same. I don't know about you, but I wouldn't be too reliant on what my step-dad said if he said that I could see him again. (I'm saying in context of your situation, not mine.)[/QUOTE] Yeah Mum didn't say much when he brought it up. She seemed hesitant
Though you might not like him, try to meet him. He's the one who gave you life, you wouldn't be here if it wasn't for him. If he's a jerk forget about him, if he's cool, well you now have a cool dad.
that's nice :3
Did they divorce or was one of your parents a douchebag? My friend had a real nutcase mother that won custody over him and had his dad pay his mom for years. Then when he turned 18 she moved away without even giving him a chance to find a place to live or anything. Now he lives with his dad who is such a cool guy, feel sorry for him. What a bitch, 18 is right between high school and what you decide to do with the rest of your life. Happy ending at least.
Good ending
He's part of the reason you exist, I'd say just go for it.
I'm pretty sure he would like to see you, just be yourself and get to know him but don't get your hopes up too much just incase shit hits the fan. Btw what part of New Zealand are you from?
[QUOTE=64fanatic;22972950]Did they divorce or was one of your parents a douchebag? My friend had a real nutcase mother that won custody over him and had his dad pay his mom for years. Then when he turned 18 she moved away without even giving him a chance to find a place to live or anything. Now he lives with his dad who is such a cool guy, feel sorry for him. What a bitch, 18 is right between high school and what you decide to do with the rest of your life. Happy ending at least.[/QUOTE] If she was such a crazy bitch, and his dad so awesome, how come she won custody?
This reminds me of something that happened to a friend of mine when he was a baby, after his dad had a brain injury. It turned out his dad was fine after he came out of his coma (after she already left) and basically he didn't get to see his kids for 16+ years because his mom was a gold digging bitch and figured she wasn't going to be getting a free ride anymore so she ran away with the kids to another country. I really hope your mom isn't like that.
[QUOTE=teeheeV2;22973256]If she was such a crazy bitch, and his dad so awesome, how come she won custody?[/QUOTE] Women have fucking cheat mode when it comes to custody battles. Unless she stood up in court and said [i]"I'm going to burn this little shit with cigarettes"[/i] she would have won.
[QUOTE=Hatelove;22972187]So here's the story. When I was about 2 Mama and Dada broke up, Mama got custody and moved to another country (Englang to New Zealand). The rest is history I grew up without out a Dad in New Zealand for the last 14 or so years, I turned out ok not too mentally damaged and I never really felt a need for my Dad. Then yesterday out of the blue my step dad ask's me "would you like to make contact or w=meet your real Dad?" I said yes but now I'm confused slightly. I grew up without him, I have no hard feelings against him but I also have not feelings of love towards him.Is that normal? Should I meet him? Doe's he deserve to meet me? I don't know. Has anybody here had a situation similar to this? if so please post how you handled it.[/QUOTE] It doesn't really matter the scenario. That man is your father, your own flesh and blood. No matter what anyone teaches you, he loves you. It is completely worth it to go and spend a day to meet this man. My father died before I can even remember him, and I'll never have a chance like this to take. So if you don't take this opportunity to meet this man for yourself, take it for all the people out there that won't have a chance to meet their own dads.
Just hang out, I'm sure it'll be fine.
Removing a child from it's birth father, (I'm not talking about divorcing him, I'm talking about going to the opposite side of the world to him) just feels wrong. It is apparent that the father in this incident [i]wants[/i] to see the OP so it's safe to see he's wanted to see the OP for a while. Possibly for 14 years. This leads me to draw the following conclusions. Your mother moved to New Zealand because: [b]1.[/b] She put herself above her kid [b]2.[/b]She wanted to hurt the father in a spectacular manner. Now I'm not saying that the birth father is blameless in this story. But you need to start asking your mother some questions.
He's probably going to try to touch your wiener.
[QUOTE=Cluckyx;22973568]Removing a child from it's birth father, (I'm not talking about divorcing him, I'm talking about going to the opposite side of the world to him) just feels wrong. It is apparent that the father in this incident [i]wants[/i] to see the OP so it's safe to see he's wanted to see the OP for a while. Possibly for 14 years. This leads me to draw the following conclusions. Your mother moved to New Zealand because: [b]1.[/b] She put herself above her kid [b]2.[/b]She wanted to hurt the father in a spectacular manner. Now I'm not saying that the birth father is blameless in this story. But you need to start asking your mother some questions.[/QUOTE] I don't really know if that was her intention, But I dont think my mother would do that to someone. Maybe she was a different person before she raised me
Congratulations, I hope he's not a complete asshole :smile:
Same story except he stole from my aunts and uncles, slashed their tires, and ran away.
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