Iran says enemies used atomic lizards to spy on its nuclear program
9 replies, posted
[URL="http://www.newsweek.com/iran-says-enemies-using-lizards-spy-nuclear-program-805195"]http://www.newsweek.com/iran-says-enemies-using-lizards-spy-nuclear-program-805195[/URL]
[QUOTE]Iran’s Western enemies used lizards that “attract atomic waves” to spy on the country’s nuclear program, the former chief-of-staff of Iran’s military announced Tuesday.
Speaking to local reporters, Hassan Firuzabadi, a senior adviser to Iran’s Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, said that the West frequently spies on Iran using tourists and environmentalists.
“Several years ago, some individuals came to Iran to collect aid for Palestine.... We were suspicious of the route they chose,” Firuzabadi told local media, AFP reports.
“In their possessions were a variety of reptile desert species like lizards, chameleons.... We found out that their skin attracts atomic waves and that they were nuclear spies who wanted to find out where inside the Islamic Republic of Iran we have uranium mines and where we are engaged in atomic activities,” Firuzabadi said.
The accusations come in the wake of reports that a Canadian-Iranian environmentalist and academic, Kavous Seyed Emami, allegedly committed suicide in an Iranian prison after being accused of spying on the country.
Human rights groups have called for an independent investigation into Emami’s death.
“If they had any evidence that he did something wrong or he exchanged any information, they would have made it public,” Omid Memarian, a New York–based Iran expert, told Newsweek.
Meanwhile, scientists cast doubt on whether lizards can be used to spy on nuclear facilities.
“The claim that lizards ‘attract atomic waves’ is nothing that I have ever heard of, and it sounds totally bogus to me,” James Andrews, a scientist at the Vermont Amphibion Atlas, told Newsweek. [/QUOTE]
Of course.
as a physicist, I'm really intrigued to find out what "atomic waves" are cause I've certainly never heard of them. These guys are nutjobs
Photographic proof:
[t]https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/fallout/images/a/a1/FO4_Mythic_Deathclaw.jpg[/t]
Edit:
Now I'm kicking myself for not going with a FONV gecko.
I have to say that the concept of using lizards as divining rods for nuclear test sites is just wacky enough to be a cool element of a Fallout-style nuclear era piece.
As someone who is trying to get a PhD in herpetology, I can tell you I have heard literally nothing on lizard's scales ability to absorb radiation.
Either Iran is a scientific leader in radiating lizards or they're full of shit, and I'm betting on the latter :v:
[editline]14th February 2018[/editline]
However I have read many reports on evolutionary radiation on Iguania taxa if that counts...
Atomic lizards in question :
[t]https://i.imgur.com/VOxUiGq.jpg[/t]
No wonder they got spotted by the military.
If their nuclear program is giving off "atomic waves" then they have a much bigger problem than some lizards.
the fools.
they think they caught the lizard people that easily? they wanted them to find those lizards as a diversion.
[video=youtube;sO2WIFTm7n4]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sO2WIFTm7n4[/video]
I think the fruitfly skit made more sense than this shit
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