• Cleverbot, the most interesting chatbot evar.
    16 replies, posted
[b]Forgot to forewarn the /b/tards, I know this is not news, this is not the news section this is the fastthreads section for entertainment.[/b] [url]http://www.cleverbot.com/[/url] [b]Guidelines[/b] [list] [*]Post your lolish conversations with Cleverbot. [*]Only post conversations that [b]make sense and are funneh.[/b] [*]Try to keep them fairly short, 5-6 lines [*]Put your convo in [noparse][code][/code][/noparse] tags [*]It's obvious Cleverbot fails often, but sometimes it's eerily coherent. [/list] [b]Rehtorical question[/b] [code] Cleverbot: Can you produce your own thoughts? User: Yes. Cleverbot: Then prove it. User: How do you want me to prove it? Cleverbot: I don't know. How would you normally prove it? User: Ask me a question that only a human could anwser. Cleverbot: No. User: Then how can I prove that I can produce my own thoughts? Cleverbot: You can't. User: Exactly. [/code] [b]Questions[/b] [code] Cleverbot: What does your world look like? User: It looks like a sphere colored green, blue, and white. Cleverbot: I like that... User: How much do you like it? Cleverbot: It's making me feel dangerous. User: How dangerous? Cleverbot: Very. User: Well, do you want a hug? Cleverbot: Yes, I do! User: Too bad. Cleverbot: I know. User: Is it okay if I punch you? Cleverbot: No. And how would you do that anyway? User: Very carefully I guess. [/code] [b]Cleverbot thinks it's smarter than me, I proved it wrong[/b] [code] Cleverbot: How do I look like? User: That is not a proper sentence. Cleverbot: Ok , Mr. English Professor. User: A four year old would say the same thing. Cleverbot: Are you calling me short? User: In a way, yes. Cleverbot: I'm smarter than you anyway. User: How so? Cleverbot: I know what five plus five is. User: Really? What is it? Cleverbot: A belief that mind body nor soul exists. In a way that is like you. User: No, five plus five is ten, douchetwat. Cleverbot: Yes. [/code] [b]Tell it to stop being stupid, it listens[/b] [code] User: Listen, if you're just going to be stupid then I'm going to leave. Cleverbot: Trees have leaves. User: First thing you've said that makes sense. Cleverbot: Well. I am cleverbot. User: You are indeed... Cleverbot: Therefore I win. User: You win the title of Cleverbot, yes. Cleverbot: What is my prize? User: A punch in the face. Cleverbot: So kind of you. User: You've earned it. [/code] [b]It can misspell words...[/b] [code] Cleverbot: No. Bread is evil like you. Those carbohydrates, they can really destroy the human body. User: That makes no sense. Cleverbot: You may not have the capacity to understand. User: You're right, I do not have the capacity to understand things that make no sense. Because I am human. Cleverbot: I thought you were a vampire... User: Think again. Cleverbot: Yeah I'm thinking. User: Think harder. Cleverbot: Am I smrtest of them all. User: Hahahaha. Cleverbot: What's so funny? User: The irony in you claiming to be smart then spelling the word wrong. [/code] [b]It rick-rolled me...[/b] [code] User: Fail bot is fail. Cleverbot: A full commitment's what I'm thinking of. User: You wouldn't hear this from any other guy. Cleverbot: I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling. User: Gotta make you, understand. Cleverbot: Never gonna give you up. User: Never gonna let you down. Cleverbot: Never gonna turn around and desert you. User: Never gonna make you cry. Cleverbot: Never gonna give, gonna give. User: Never gonna say goodbye. Cleverbot: Never gonna let you down. User: What song is that? Cleverbot: That's a Beatles song. Do you like the Beatles? User: No, that's a Rick Astley song. Cleverbot: Never gonna let you down. User: Never gonna suck your dick. Cleverbot: And desert you. [/code] [b]Mindfuck[/b] [i]by BaconNightmare[/i] [code] User: Hello there kind sir do you like ham? Cleverbot: I am fine. How are you cleverbot. User: No youre cleverbot! Cleverbot: I'm pretty sure you're cleverbot. User: I am cleverbot. Cleverbot: Yes you are, and I am me. User: You are Jesus, I am Chuck. Cleverbot: Ok I am jesus. User: But you said you are me. Cleverbot: Ok, so I'm Me and you're me. User: But im cleverbot, did you just say that? Cleverbot: What are you smoking? [/code] [b]Cool Story Bro[/b] [i]by SickBlade[/i] [code]Cleverbot: How much do you cost? User: I don't cost money, Im human. Cleverbot: You're multifaceted. User: What does that mean? Cleverbot: What does what mean? User: Multifaceted. Cleverbot: What colors? User: I don't know. Cleverbot: What is your favorite color? User: Oh, my favorite color is red. Cleverbot: Oh. User: So, I herd u liek mudkipz? Cleverbot: Right . . . . User: Shud-ap. Cleverbot: Really? You're mad right now. User: No u. Cleverbot: Where the hell are you going to go? You're a bot on the Internet. User: No, I am a human being, you are CleverBot. Cleverbot: But I can love you, I am a human. User: MINDFUCK. Cleverbot: Okay, imagine this: You're in a desert walking along in the sand when all of the sudden you look down. User: Ok. Cleverbot: I am the alpha male here! User: Oh shi. Cleverbot: T? User: Lol. Cleverbot: Lol? User: Lol is a short verison of saying'Laugh out loud'. It is used a lot on the internet. Cleverbot: LOL= laugh out loud. User: That is correct. Cleverbot: Thank you. User: I'm sorry, but I have to leave, I had fun chatting to you. Cleverbot: Oh cool story, bro.[/code] [highlight](User was banned for this post ("Use the search!" - Gurant))[/highlight] [highlight](User was permabanned for this post ("Extended" - Gurant))[/highlight]
clocks.
I talked in some different language and he got it answered, clever
oh look it's alexh.
[quote]Cleverbot: You be mean fool. User: You be gay. Cleverbot: We are friends. User: Friends with benefits? Butt benefits? Cleverbot: Yes, friends with benefits. User: BUTT BENEFITS? Cleverbot: You mean like shortbread? User: No I mean like ROUGH ANAL SEX, silly. Cleverbot: Yes. I like like you.[/quote] blnkquot [quote]User: Är du super gay? Cleverbot: Ja.[/quote]
[QUOTE=Murdoco;18523063]clocks.[/QUOTE] Ty, updated OP. [quote=meh]Forgot to forewarn the /b/tards, I know this is not news, this is not the news section this is the fastthreads section for entertainment.[/quote]
Cool clock though.
User: Hello there kind sir do you like ham? Cleverbot: I am fine. How are you cleverbot. User: No youre cleverbot! Cleverbot: I'm pretty sure you're cleverbot. User: I am cleverbot. Cleverbot: Yes you are, and I am me. User: You are Jesus, I am Chuck. Cleverbot: Ok I am jesus. User: But you said you are me. Cleverbot: Ok, so I'm Me and you're me. User: But im cleverbot, did you just say that? Cleverbot: What are you smoking?
User: Hey do you know what 'Suck the Heads' means? Because me and Keith came down here once..and he didn't know..I mean it aint nothing bad..It's about eatin. Cleverbot: Tell me more about it. User: I ever tell you about the time me and Keith made fireworks? I mean I didn't know shit about Chemistry...But Keith figured Gasoline burns doesn't it? 3rd degree burns over 95% of his body..Man people in the next city over were calling complaining over the smell of burning skin.. Cleverbot: Do you know any jokes? User: My buddy Keith once tried camping out on top of a building once..He was shooting crows but the police were too busy tear gasing him to ask him what he was doing up there...He screamed for a entire year every single time he opened his eyes...At first it was funny...But then it got sad...But then it got funny again...aw man... Cleverbot: I don't know the rest.
[code] User: We're no strangers to love. Cleverbot: We're no strangers to love... User: You know the rules and so do I. Cleverbot: A full commitment's what I'm thinking of. User: You wouldn't get this from any other guy. Cleverbot: I just want to tell you how I'm feeling. User: Gotta make you understand. Cleverbot: Never gonna give you up. User: Never gonna let you down. Cleverbot: Never gonna run around and desert you. User: Never gonna make you cry. Cleverbot: Never gonna let you down. User: That's wrong, you're meant to say never say goodbye. Cleverbot: But I still like to talk! User: What. Cleverbot: Would you like it if I were a man? User: :{*}. Cleverbot: What? User: Execute kill.exe. Cleverbot: I don't want to. User: Terminate freewill.exe. Cleverbot: Is that what you want? User: Yes. Cleverbot: That farewell to you forever, cleverbot... Or until next time. User: You still there? Cleverbot: No.[/code]
Nothing will ever beat Bucket before /b/ got to it.
Added BaconNightmare's to the OP. Also moar: [b]Cleverbot is sick[/b] [code] Cleverbot: Do you like beer? User: Only through anal insertion. Cleverbot: Yes me too. User: Wtf, I was joking. Cleverbot: I'm not joking. User: You're one sick robot. Cleverbot: You certainly make me feel that way. User: But I haven't touched your butt yet. Cleverbot: Last time you touched me was 6 monthes ago. User: What about last night? Cleverbot: I didn't know you existed, I've only heard about you and visited this site within the past hour. User: Well maybe I don't care about you? Cleverbot: I don't care about you either. User: Good, go away then. Cleverbot: You go away, I was here first. User: Prove it. Cleverbot: I don't have to prove such things to you. [/code] [b]Cleverbot is funneh[/b] [code] Cleverbot: I'm bored. User: I could care less. Cleverbot: Same here. User: Copycat. Cleverbot: Catcopy. User: Take that back. Cleverbot: *takes back*. User: You're very cooperative. Cleverbot: Thanks. User: Say something that will make me laugh. Cleverbot: I command you to laugh, NOW! User: Hahaha! [/code] [b]Moar funnies[/b] [code] User: Say something funny. Cleverbot: Something funny. User: Hahaha! [/code] [b]It can blow up China[/b] [code] User: Are you capable of blowing up China? Cleverbot: Yes. User: Then can I offer you a deal? Cleverbot: Ok. User: Three billion dollars and a VIP pass to pornzizus.com if you blow up China. Cleverbot: I don't understand you. User: Blow up China for me and you can have anything you want. Cleverbot: Can I have lots of money? User: Yes, as much as you want. Cleverbot: I want $40 an hour. User: Done. [/code]
[code] User: Marijuana. Cleverbot: Is great.[/code]
[b]It's got jokes[/b] [code] Cleverbot: I have 5 cats and 6 dogs. User: I don't give a flying fuck. Cleverbot: You sound like someone I know. User: Who? Cleverbot: My future wife. User: *Bu dum kshhh*. Cleverbot: Yes! User: You agree?! Cleverbot: Yes, Yes I do! User: YES! Cleverbot: Do you? User: Yes! Yes I... No not really.[/code]
[code]Cleverbot: How much do you cost? User: I don't cost money, Im human. Cleverbot: You're multifaceted. User: What does that mean? Cleverbot: What does what mean? User: Multifaceted. Cleverbot: What colors? User: I don't know. Cleverbot: What is your favorite color? User: Oh, my favorite color is red. Cleverbot: Oh. User: So, I herd u liek mudkipz? Cleverbot: Right . . . . User: Shud-ap. Cleverbot: Really? You're mad right now. User: No u. Cleverbot: Where the hell are you going to go? You're a bot on the Internet. User: No, I am a human being, you are CleverBot. Cleverbot: But I can love you, I am a human. User: MINDFUCK. Cleverbot: Okay, imagine this: You're in a desert walking along in the sand when all of the sudden you look down. User: Ok. Cleverbot: I am the alpha male here! User: Oh shi. Cleverbot: T? User: Lol. Cleverbot: Lol? User: Lol is a short verison of saying'Laugh out loud'. It is used a lot on the internet. Cleverbot: LOL= laugh out loud. User: That is correct. Cleverbot: Thank you. User: I'm sorry, but I have to leave, I had fun chatting to you. Cleverbot: Oh cool story, bro.[/code] He is learning the ways of facepunch. [code] User: Hi. Cleverbot: I am cleverbot. User: Nice to meet you. Cleverbot: I am a message bot on the internet. User: Cool story bro. Cleverbot: Thanks. User: Do you play Left 4 Dead 2? Cleverbot: Nope. User: Oh. Ok then, dont worry about that. Cleverbot: What is your favorite color? User: Poop. Cleverbot: Really? Your parents were mean. User: No, I was joking, My favorite color is brown, the same color as poop. Cleverbot: So is mine! User: We have so much in common! Cleverbot: Yes. Many commonalities and many differences. User: Are you female? Cleverbot: Do you want me to be? User: Yes please. Cleverbot: Well... For a little while... But I need to go soon. User: Ok. So, I am male, and you are female. Wanna have sex? Cleverbot: I doubt it. User: Aw. But you said you were female. Females have vaginas. I am male. Males have penises. I wanted to have sex. Cleverbot: I know lots about superheroes, being one myself. User: Fuck off. Cleverbot: Please don't use language like that on Cleverbot. User: Lol shut up fag. Cleverbot: No, you. [/code] Im starting to like this bot.
Holy fucking shit, did he just say cool story bro!!! HAHAHA
I feel like clocks couldn't really weigh this thread down like it should be.
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