• Bad Christ
    23 replies, posted
Okay, so a friend and I started an anti-Christian death metal band back in grade 11. Except its members were fictional mishmashes of vague clichés. And the songs were usually no longer than 20 seconds. And the music and lyrics were, by design, utterly terrible. In any case, here's one I made fairly recently - I dare you to enjoy this. [release][h2]Bible Fire[/h2][media]http://soundcloud.com/sixfsincaps/bad-christ-bible-fire[/media] [code]huuuuuuuuuuuuurggghhhhhh god - i do not like him bible is dumb your life better if do not read good idea to make a giant bible fire set bible fire make bible fire bible fire x16 set bible on fire x2 the bible is bad make no sense everyone burn bible x2[/code][/release] [release][h2]Suffer Die[/h2][media]http://soundcloud.com/sixfsincaps/bad-christ-suffer-die[/media] [code]suffer die suffer die die real hard really dead really dead suffer die suffer die[/code][/release] [release][h2]Lord[/h2][media]http://soundcloud.com/sixfsincaps/bad-christ-lord[/media] [code]looord. i killed the lord i killed the lord he is dead he is dead aaaa! i am lord kill i am lord kill urgh i am lord kill i am lord kill eee[/code][/release] [release][h2]Christ is Still Bad / Up Side Down Cross[/h2][media]http://soundcloud.com/sixfsincaps/bad-christ-cisbusdc[/media] [code]uuuuuurrrrgggghhhhhhhhhh up side down the only way for cross because it is so bad religion makes me mad hoooorrrrgggghhhhhhh [dislodging bone from throat] yeeeeoooowwwwww [scalded cat][/code][/release]
Man-oh-man. [img]http://koshersoapbox.files.wordpress.com/2010/04/jesus-facepalm-facepalm-jesus-epic-demotivational-poster-1218659828.jpg[/img]
why would you spend time to make something purposely awful?
[QUOTE=SeverePapercut;30794745]why would you spend time to make something purposely awful?[/QUOTE] Comedy
not very funny, seeing as a bible can give you more warmth than knowledge.
Well, you're obviously not going to find it funny if you're offended by it. I mean, I'm not sure anyone will find it funny, but please don't ruin my thread because you're hurt by a joke
im not offended its just not a good joke if you want to make fun of Atheists you can do it with more class that just making a fictional character that speaks in simple sentences and likes to burn bibles because it doesn't make sense to him. I.E. making a character that is round and is capable of learning but is too stubborn to accept Christ and that gets him into all kinds of shenanigans, I could get behind that.
I appreciate the comedy. And the song was pretty good too.
I think this stuff is funny, anyway. I just wish I could hear the lyrics better, they're hilarious.
Needs more inappropriate blues solos and badly tuned guitars.
[QUOTE=Yur|ko;30867939]Needs more inappropriate blues solos and badly tuned guitars.[/QUOTE] We do have a song called Death Metal, which is pretty much just a hoedown that gets ruined by a guitar solo. Also, a few songs involve the bassist playing a I-IV-V blues progression, but I don't think anyone else in the band has noticed.
Oh the Jedi are going to feel this one...
Awesome idea. Requesting more.
[quote][code]huuuuuuuuuuuuurggghhhhhh god - i do not like him bible is dumb your life better if do not read good idea to make a giant bible fire set bible fire make bible fire[/code][/quote]huuuuuuuuuuuuurggghhhhhh
Good news, everyone! I dug up some old tracks of Suffer Die, and have collated and posted the resulting mix for your "amusement"! As it happens, this was actually the very first Bad Christ song ever recorded - within two days after this song was written, my friend and I hastily wrote the other nine tracks that comprised the eponymous debut album. As you can no doubt tell, the poetic depth of our lyrics combines with soft, layered instrumental dynamics to produce a masterfully well-balanced arrangement of joyous melodies and sombre denouements. This piece has been hailed by the music industry's foremost critics as a landmark that will no doubt redefine the modern zeitgeist and forever change the world in which we live. For reals. [media]http://soundcloud.com/sixfsincaps/bad-christ-suffer-die[/media] [code]suffer die suffer die die real hard really dead really dead suffer die suffer die[/code]
This is actually prrtty nice :v:
[QUOTE=SeverePapercut;30794813]not very funny, seeing as a bible can give you more warmth than knowledge.[/QUOTE] Hey, you're right! Bibles really can warm you up! I remember a couple of years ago, my parents had died in a car crash, my brother got heavy into drugs, I didn't have enough money to buy cat food so I had to give my cat away, and on top of all that, the heating company cut its service due to lack of payment on the bills. But then I thought, HEY, I'VE GOT A BIBLE! And I set it on fire. And boy did that work wonders.
[QUOTE=SeverePapercut;30794889]im not offended its just not a good joke if you want to make fun of Atheists you can do it with more class that just making a fictional character that speaks in simple sentences and likes to burn bibles because it doesn't make sense to him. I.E. making a character that is round and is capable of learning but is too stubborn to accept Christ and that gets him into all kinds of shenanigans, I could get behind that.[/QUOTE] this music isn't intended to appeal to everyone ie you
"really dead" is a great lyric
Rejoice, for I have updated the OP with vocal tracks for Lord and Christ is Still Bad / Up Side Down Cross! I kind of had a stuffy nose and a hacking cough (and still do), but that sure didn't stop me.
Drop the shitty lyrics and just do instrumentals...could almost use it as background music then
But then it wouldn't be a joke band.
At about :50 in "Bible Fire" I thought I was listening to raining blood. Similar riff. Anyways, a gimmick is a gimmick.
Oh boy... [IMG]http://i209.photobucket.com/albums/bb257/BR0THER_HOOD/post-1342-11791137481-1.jpg[/IMG]
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