My rap lyrics - General - Facepunch Forum

just workin on some pieces if you dont like rap and want to voice that opinion which you are totally entitled to, then fuck off this thread isn't for you. if you post saying rap is crap (lol!!) then it automatically means you're gay called it heres a few (when they are double spaced, its two completely different verses so dont put them together) by sundown today you better be quittin before i sweep the legs from this chair you be sittin look as i be spittin and hittin flippin like lickity splittin its pretty wittin yo face in pictures i be omittin like a plumber omittin pipe fittin these radios be transmittin the truth and then youll be admittin that my glory n fame is unremittin you can run wit scissors, as long as you dont trip cant get me off your shoulder, so just call me chip by the time you think about it i'll be finished my clip ill grind your organs to a sauce and use it as dip fe fi fo fum, bitch you in my grip do what i want with ya, twirl ya around, make ya flip bust ya nose chin eyes, ears and lips attract so much blood you'd think i'm a crip

beats coming at ya! [media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4ULgJ9NiQo&feature=related[/media]

in this song we gettin fried got my homies on my side got our bitches in the back and you know we showin pride niggas walkin' while we stride affect you like the moon to tide you think we goin to collide until access is denied and we hot like july bustin faggots on the fly and we will tell you why and i hope this dont imply that we even goin to try cuz we just gonna lie and dont bother to reply cuz we'll just say goodbye yuh

cool bro

ty thanks for constructive criticism

[QUOTE=HybridThizle;20016340]ty thanks for constructive criticism[/QUOTE] Cool stuff man. You got the potential.

I really like the "yuh" at the end of the rap. It really pulls it all together.

thank you. so really is there anything to work on? i really want to try recording some songs but i'd like to see if my lyrical skills are good enough first

You know this is good but you do know this bud. this isn't really well, doesn't sound quite swell. The Spelling is horrible, we don't think its adorable. Just kidding, its good.

the spelling represent my soul also blackspeak

[QUOTE=HybridThizle;20021070]the spelling represent my soul also blackspeak[/QUOTE] Blackspeak!

I actually liked it even tho I don't listen to rap. You should record some songs.

Terrible dude! You just picked a rhyme, and wrote 15 lines that end with it! Honestly, it needs A LOT more work. Read more lyrics, notice how they usually don't stay with a rhyme for more than a few lines? You sorta let the beat "play you off" a rhyme, and start the next one. Course, it'll be a rather mediocre rap, but it'll get you on track. Sorry if this came off harsh, just made me rage a little.

[QUOTE=fskman;20034688]Terrible dude! You just picked a rhyme, and wrote 15 lines that end with it! Honestly, it needs A LOT more work. Read more lyrics, notice how they usually don't stay with a rhyme for more than a few lines? You sorta let the beat "play you off" a rhyme, and start the next one. Course, it'll be a rather mediocre rap, but it'll get you on track. Sorry if this came off harsh, just made me rage a little.[/QUOTE] hahah very nice hybrid, keep on rapping!