I recorded a beautiful heavy metal song. Tell me what you think, if you want.
[url]http://soundcloud.com/alex-of-steel/clog-the-sky[/url]
It's really dull and generic.
I'm sorry but that was pretty awful.
that was the most amazing thing i have ever allowed my ears to feast upon
I dig those Midi drums.
Nah but seriously it's really good - catchy riff and nice vocals - you just really need to step up the production.
At 4:00 it becomes great because the guitars get fatter. Keep that style thoughout the whole song man!!
The singing was fucking atrocious, but the rest was probably ok for someone that likes metal.
Actually thought it was a joke.
[QUOTE=Drsalvador;33857982]It's really dull and generic.[/QUOTE]
If that were true, I'd never have written or recorded it.
[editline]23rd December 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=Rad McCool;33858620]I dig those Midi drums.
Nah but seriously it's really good - catchy riff and nice vocals - you just really need to step up the production.
At 4:00 it becomes great because the guitars get fatter. Keep that style thoughout the whole song man!![/QUOTE]
Thanks, seriously.
[editline]23rd December 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=Larry_G;33858348]I'm sorry but that was pretty awful.[/QUOTE]
Coming from someone who obviously has an eye for quality, based on your avatar.
[editline]23rd December 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=Dead Madman;33859063]The singing was fucking atrocious, but the rest was probably ok for someone that likes metal.
Actually thought it was a joke.[/QUOTE]
It's supposed to be serious, but the lyrics aren't.
And, I obviously did all this with it in mind that "someone that likes metal" would be the particular demographic that might enjoy it.
Insulting the people who criticise you won't get you anywhere.
Really, everybody who said negative things has been rated dumb by you.
The MIDI drums are the weak point. I really like the riffs, and the guitar tone actually works really good - and I'm not normally a fan of that fuzzy tone in metal. Also, [b]change the solo guitar tone[/b]. It's horrible, scratchy, and painful. Whenever a solo comes in, I cringe a bit.
I absolutely love the vocals. They remind me cannily of a band I listened to a few times and liked, but I can not for life of me think of their name. They have a definite power metal vibe to me, while at the same time having the gruffness that groove metal is known for. I love it.
The lyrics also make me think of Between the Buried and Me. Very well done mate. I like it a lot.
If you want, I can run those drums through GuitarPro 6, give them a bit of a beefier sound than those MIDI drums. Then you can mix them back into the song and see if you like it better.
Also, [b]don't change the lyrics[/b]. I actually think they're perfect as they are. Very abstract and non-sensical (again, like Between the Buried and Me), but they work so beautifully with your voice.
Honestly, if I knew more power metal bands that used vocals like yours, I would listen to power metal a lot more. I love those rough vocals (with the emphasis on syllables and such as you do) contrasting with the power metal-ish riffs. :v:
[QUOTE=Alex of Steel;33865885]If that were true, I'd never have written or recorded it.
[editline]23rd December 2011[/editline]
Thanks, seriously.
[editline]23rd December 2011[/editline]
Coming from someone who obviously has an eye for quality, based on your avatar.
[editline]23rd December 2011[/editline]
It's supposed to be serious, but the lyrics aren't.
And, I obviously did all this with it in mind that "someone that likes metal" would be the particular demographic that might enjoy it.[/QUOTE]
Why do you ask people to tell what they think of your work, if you're gonna be a dick and are not even capable of handling critique. The fuck is wrong with you.
[QUOTE=Eric95;33867431]Insulting the people who criticise you won't get you anywhere.
Really, everybody who said negative things has been rated dumb by you.[/QUOTE]
I rated them based on how they said it, not so much what they actually said.
[editline]24th December 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=Gmod4ever;33867530]The MIDI drums are the weak point. I really like the riffs, and the guitar tone actually works really good - and I'm not normally a fan of that fuzzy tone in metal. Also, [b]change the solo guitar tone[/b]. It's horrible, scratchy, and painful. Whenever a solo comes in, I cringe a bit.
I absolutely love the vocals. They remind me cannily of a band I listened to a few times and liked, but I can not for life of me think of their name. They have a definite power metal vibe to me, while at the same time having the gruffness that groove metal is known for. I love it.
The lyrics also make me think of Between the Buried and Me. Very well done mate. I like it a lot.
If you want, I can run those drums through GuitarPro 6, give them a bit of a beefier sound than those MIDI drums. Then you can mix them back into the song and see if you like it better.
Also, [b]don't change the lyrics[/b]. I actually think they're perfect as they are. Very abstract and non-sensical (again, like Between the Buried and Me), but they work so beautifully with your voice.
Honestly, if I knew more power metal bands that used vocals like yours, I would listen to power metal a lot more. I love those rough vocals (with the emphasis on syllables and such as you do) contrasting with the power metal-ish riffs. :v:[/QUOTE]
Thanks for actually giving some coherent feedback.
I tried a new thing with the guitar solo tone, specifically, and I don't think I'll do it that way again.
I ran the drums through Guitar Pro 5, so I don't know how different they'd sound with Guitar Pro 6.
Power metal bands tend to write songs in keys that are too high for me, with very clean tones, but I can't really do it that way, sounding somewhere beetween Lemmy/Joe Cocker.
Thanks again, for the comment.
[editline]24th December 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=healthpoint;33867790]Why do you ask people to tell what they think of your work, if you're gonna be a dick and are not even capable of handling critique. The fuck is wrong with you.[/QUOTE]
It's not really "critique" if the person doesn't say what it was they didn't like, and didn't offer any kind of means of improvement.
[QUOTE=Alex of Steel;33869627]I ran the drums through Guitar Pro 5, so I don't know how different they'd sound with Guitar Pro 6.[/QUOTE]
Well, here's a song I did some days back in GP6. It's written intentionally to be fairly generic (the idea was background music for zombie killing), but the drums are mixed into it better than others of mine, so you can hear them fairly clearly.
Lemme know if you think you want to try with a drum tone similar to this.
[url]http://dl.dropbox.com/u/8416055/Music/ZKM/Dead%20March.mp3[/url]
[QUOTE=Gmod4ever;33872315]Well, here's a song I did some days back in GP6. It's written intentionally to be fairly generic (the idea was background music for zombie killing), but the drums are mixed into it better than others of mine, so you can hear them fairly clearly.
Lemme know if you think you want to try with a drum tone similar to this.
[url]http://dl.dropbox.com/u/8416055/Music/ZKM/Dead%20March.mp3[/url][/QUOTE]
Those drums sound great, much better than mine. Is there a way I could get some kind of access to that stuff?
[QUOTE=Alex of Steel;33872427]Those drums sound great, much better than mine. Is there a way I could get some kind of access to that stuff?[/QUOTE]
They are part of the Realistic Sound Engine for GuitarPro 6.
If you don't want to spend the dosh to get it yourself, I'd be willing to run your drum MIDI file through and give you the resulting .WAV to play with. I may have to rewrite or otherwise modify some drum parts though, because some of GP6's drum sounds are frankly really shitty (for example, toms are horrid sounding, and sound more like conga drums than any real toms I have ever heard in my life).
[QUOTE=Gmod4ever;33872461]They are part of the Realistic Sound Engine for GuitarPro 6.
If you don't want to spend the dosh to get it yourself, I'd be willing to run your drum MIDI file through and give you the resulting .WAV to play with. I may have to rewrite or otherwise modify some drum parts though, because some of GP6's drum sounds are frankly really shitty (for example, toms are horrid sounding, and sound more like conga drums than any real toms I have ever heard in my life).[/QUOTE]
That sounds pretty complicated. Exactly how expensive would it be to buy a copy of Guitar Pro 6? Would it be better to get something that is specifically built for writing drum tracks?
It's not the worst thing I've ever heard, but it could use some work. Your guitar riffs are pretty solid. Get a new solo tone.
Your vocals and chords constantly remind me of Through the Fire and Flames by Dragonforce.
Get a real dummer and a bassist, and work on your song structure. It's 9 minutes long and doesn't really go anywhere. Your opening riff and your vocals are solid, but you really shouldn't transition into a long widdly-widdly-widdly guitar solo so early. And you really should have some parts that let the listener rest for a little while, it's pretty hectic.
"Thanks for giving at least some coherant feedback"
What the fuck I said you need to improve on the song in the way that you need to make it listenable
[QUOTE=Alex of Steel;33869627]I rated them based on how they said it, not so much what they actually said.
It's not really "critique" if the person doesn't say what it was they didn't like, and didn't offer any kind of means of improvement.[/QUOTE]
If someone says it's dull, generic, has bad singing or is just awful you should take that criticism and listen to it. The "awful" part might sound like it's just insulting but combine that with the other criticism instead and it adds extra force to it.
Honestly the mixing is really bad and it's really boring. I couldn't stand more than 20 seconds. And before you rate me dumb for not listening to the whole thing that's not an excuse. It's not a good song if you can't hold your audience.
[QUOTE=fenwick;33873941]
Your vocals and chords constantly remind me of Through the Fire and Flames by Dragonforce.
[/QUOTE]
Haha this is so true. The vocal melody along with those chords is just shamelessly ripped from TTFAF. I mean, that chord sequence is like the most commonly used minor sequence ever and there's no problem using it, you can't just steal the melody like that. :P
[QUOTE=fenwick;33873941]And you really should have some parts that let the listener rest for a little while, it's pretty hectic.[/QUOTE]
This is heavy metal, man. You rest between the songs.
I posted about 15 comments. The gist is: Vocals are pretty mediocre, but there is hope; you have a basic grasp of a basic power metal voice BUT their melody is the same as Through The Fire and Flames (and I see others mentioned it too). The guitar tone is awful. The riffs are nice and the solos are awesome. The midi drums make it very weird. All in all, production was very very bad. There were some nice up-tempo spots.
Work on: Guitar tone, vocals, originality of melodies, mixing, production in general
You're good on: Drum ideas, guitar playing, and lyrics I guess
Also the song is MASSIVE. Take your time, make something small first. Once you perfect small songs, go onto something bigger.
also I can pass your drums through superior drummer if you want. It's a program with about 50GB of uncompressed samples from Drum Kits. Sample from a song: [url]http://soundcloud.com/sanctuaryforthedead/thrashy-solo-c-with-bass[/url] (yeah that's a shameless plug)
[QUOTE=fenwick;33873941]It's not the worst thing I've ever heard, but it could use some work. Your guitar riffs are pretty solid. Get a new solo tone.
Your vocals and chords constantly remind me of Through the Fire and Flames by Dragonforce.
Get a real dummer and a bassist, and work on your song structure. It's 9 minutes long and doesn't really go anywhere. Your opening riff and your vocals are solid, but you really shouldn't transition into a long widdly-widdly-widdly guitar solo so early. And you really should have some parts that let the listener rest for a little while, it's pretty hectic.[/QUOTE]
I had an actual bassist.
If it sounds like Dragonforce, it's probably because I've got influences similar to theirs.
What do you mean, "parts that let the listener rest"? Like, what?
[editline]24th December 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=Dead Madman;33874469]"Thanks for giving at least some coherant feedback"
What the fuck I said you need to improve on the song in the way that you need to make it listenable[/QUOTE]
Guess what? I was talking about something else. Don't worry about it.
I think he means instead of being so in your face all the time have a period where it moves into something a little calmer, if that makes any sense.
[QUOTE=Eric95;33874472]If someone says it's dull, generic, has bad singing or is just awful you should take that criticism and listen to it. The "awful" part might sound like it's just insulting but combine that with the other criticism instead and it adds extra force to it.
Honestly the mixing is really bad and it's really boring. I couldn't stand more than 20 seconds. And before you rate me dumb for not listening to the whole thing that's not an excuse. It's not a good song if you can't hold your audience.[/QUOTE]
The website it's on says it's been played over 200 times in the last two days, so I've held several people's interest over the course of a pretty long song.
If someone says it's dull, generic, has bad singing, or is "just awful", how exactly would I take something like that into account? Most of those things are too relative for me to be able to change them.
[QUOTE=Dead Madman;33874469]"Thanks for giving at least some coherant feedback"
What the fuck I said you need to improve on the song in the way that you need to make it listenable[/QUOTE]
That's not good feedback, that's being unhelpful and unfriendly. If you explained in a nice way [i]how[/i] he could make it more listenable, then you'd be getting somewhere.
I'm honestly not sure who's worse, the people calling it awful or the guy who wrote it that can't take criticism and ignore the idiots (although I'm siding with the OP).
Either way it's not good in it's current state but as a draft of sorts it has a lot of potential. The production is really bad (the guitar has no body, the solo tone is bad, the mix is not great (drums are too loud -and are awful samples/midi), the vocals need work, etc), but there are very nice riffs in there and if you take more time to play the solos without mistakes and the sloppiness they would be fantastic.
The overall composition isn't that great either, it doesn't really lead anywhere any the solos feel randomly placed, you could probably do with rejigging it so there's some kind of build up, main section, downtempo midsection, crescendo ending. That kind of thing.
[QUOTE=Rad McCool;33874485]Haha this is so true. The vocal melody along with those chords is just shamelessly ripped from TTFAF. I mean, that chord sequence is like the most commonly used minor sequence ever and there's no problem using it, you can't just steal the melody like that. :P
This is heavy metal, man. You rest between the songs.[/QUOTE]
The part at about 4.00 sounds kind of similar to the vocal melody in the Dragonforce song, but that's really the only one. The other 3, I'd say, sound different.
[editline]24th December 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=i_speel_good;33875430]I posted about 15 comments. The gist is: Vocals are pretty mediocre, but there is hope; you have a basic grasp of a basic power metal voice BUT their melody is the same as Through The Fire and Flames (and I see others mentioned it too). The guitar tone is awful. The riffs are nice and the solos are awesome. The midi drums make it very weird. All in all, production was very very bad. There were some nice up-tempo spots.
Work on: Guitar tone, vocals, originality of melodies, mixing, production in general
You're good on: Drum ideas, guitar playing, and lyrics I guess
Also the song is MASSIVE. Take your time, make something small first. Once you perfect small songs, go onto something bigger.
also I can pass your drums through superior drummer if you want. It's a program with about 50GB of uncompressed samples from Drum Kits. Sample from a song: [url]http://soundcloud.com/sanctuaryforthedead/thrashy-solo-c-with-bass[/url] (yeah that's a shameless plug)[/QUOTE]
The production was bad, because I did all of it at home, by myself. The sound quality of the track really isn't that bad, "for heavy metal".
This is the fifth non-instrumental song I've recorded, I've done some smaller songs.
[editline]24th December 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=chaz13;33878659]That's not good feedback, that's being unhelpful and unfriendly. If you explained in a nice way [i]how[/i] he could make it more listenable, then you'd be getting somewhere.
I'm honestly not sure who's worse, the people calling it awful or the guy who wrote it that can't take criticism and ignore the idiots (although I'm siding with the OP).
Either way it's not good in it's current state but as a draft of sorts it has a lot of potential. The production is really bad (the guitar has no body, the solo tone is bad, the mix is not great (drums are too loud -and are awful samples/midi), the vocals need work, etc), but there are very nice riffs in there and if you take more time to play the solos without mistakes and the sloppiness they would be fantastic.
The overall composition isn't that great either, it doesn't really lead anywhere any the solos feel randomly placed, you could probably do with rejigging it so there's some kind of build up, main section, downtempo midsection, crescendo ending. That kind of thing.[/QUOTE]
That's kind of the idea, that it'd work as a "draft, of sorts". I have no access to any musicians who can actually play this sort of stuff, so I figure, if I eventually do, I'll have something I can use to teach them some songs.
[QUOTE=Alex of Steel;33878738]The part at about 4.00 sounds kind of similar to the vocal melody in the Dragonforce song, but that's really the only one. The other 3, I'd say, sound different.[/QUOTE]
0:26
1:16
4:00
4:46
6:16
6:47
They all sounds alike. And they all sound like TFAFF. No matter what your excuse for this is you will not get away with it since the resemblance is too great. It also doesn't help that everybody has heard Fire.
jesus christ this is nigh identical to TFAFF only with astoundingly terrible guitars that just wail off out of tune into nowhere
and the drums are playing a totally different song
[QUOTE=Alex of Steel;33878652]The website it's on says it's been played over 200 times in the last two days, so I've held several people's interest over the course of a pretty long song.
If someone says it's dull, generic, has bad singing, or is "just awful", how exactly would I take something like that into account? Most of those things are too relative for me to be able to change them.[/QUOTE]
Soundcloud is like YouTube. You can watch ten seconds of a video and it still counts as a view.
If someone says it's dull, try to make it more exciting. If someone says it's generic, consider making it more unique. If someone says it has bad singing, try to improve your singing. See what I'm talking about?
[QUOTE=Alex of Steel;33878738]The production was bad, because I did all of it at home, by myself. The sound quality of the track really isn't that bad, "for heavy metal".[/QUOTE]
I record at home by myself too. That's not an excuse.
[QUOTE=Alex of Steel;33878738]The production was bad, because I did all of it at home, by myself. The sound quality of the track really isn't that bad, "for heavy metal".[/QUOTE]
That's a really shitty excuse, look up Bulb, he did everything at home with DFH, and his songs have an amazing quality productionwise.
Sorry, you need to Log In to post a reply to this thread.