My instrumental orchestral metal Song called Burning Scars - General

Hello dear other musicians, today I made a song I called Burning Scars. It's about 3 minutes long, it's an instrumental song and I would say the genre is kinda orchestra metal-ish. [media]http://soundcloud.com/devouringstorm/burning-scars[/media] I play the bass, the guitar, had two years drumming lessons and compose songs since May 2011 for my two bands: a folk metal band and a death metal band. I write songs for fun, too, of course. I would be delighted to hear some criticism from some other composers.

No one care to comment? Even rate?

I like the 0:38 - 0:42 riff. I dislike the lack of any lead melodies.

I suppose my Amon Amarth style when playing the guitar was a bit (too?) much of an influence to my piano compositions. Although I must say I don't understand your point that there are ANY lead melodies. In my opinion most of the riffs are a lead melody, but that may also be explained by my fandom for the AA-style. I'll try to get rid of that style when composing piano melodies. Thanks for your criticism.

Well it's just that riffs are usually accompanied by either vocals or leads. They get dull pretty quickly when they are alone. But that's just me.

I am used to writing vocals for my songs. That may have influenced me in this song which is, of course, a bit unfitting for an instrumental song.

I have a few ideas about how I'd approach this piece. To me, it sounds like you wrote the piano riff on the guitar. If that's the case, it should probably stay on guitar. Currently, your piano line doesn't sound at all like a piano line, a pianist would be very confused if you asked him to play this. If you want to write a piano part, write it at the piano. It'll make you write more instinctively for that instrument. It's a pretty cool riff, though, I like it, so I'd keep it but put it on distorted guitar, where it seems to belong. I'm not a huge fan of the melodic line at 1:42. To me it's too [i]perpetuum mobile[/i], but that could be just taste. I would personally put in a few rests in there, make it come back in on off-beats to give it a bit more kick. I don't hear enough of the orchestra. I hear 1, sometimes 2 lines of synth strings, which isn't really the same. (It could just be low in the mix, or whatever) An orchestra has four sections - strings, woodwind, brass, and percussion. You could make much more use of brass, woodwind, and orchestral percussion. Heavy brass is usually really powerful, and woodwind is often used for lighter passages or lines. You have enough metal percussion, so I wouldn't use much orchestral percussion besides timpani. Try coming up with some imaginitive orchestrations to flesh out some chords with different instruments, double some lines with brass, or add some large stabbing chords on strong or weak beats to give a sense of grandeur. At the moment, I'm just not hearing the "orchestral" part of your orchestral metal song. I guess orchestral music is more my thing so I've commented more on that than the metal aspect, but I do think your riff is cool. If you could pull off the orchestral sound a bit more, you might get a decent neoclassical/prog metal sound going, or perhaps some kind of symphonic power metal. Anyway I thought the piece was cool, keep at it.

First of all, thank you for your reply. Your post is pretty long so let me split it up a bit. [QUOTE=Neon-Knight;34297071]To me, it sounds like you wrote the piano riff on the guitar. If that's the case, it should probably stay on guitar. Currently, your piano line doesn't sound at all like a piano line, a pianist would be very confused if you asked him to play this. If you want to write a piano part, write it at the piano. It'll make you write more instinctively for that instrument. It's a pretty cool riff, though, I like it, so I'd keep it but put it on distorted guitar, where it seems to belong. [/QUOTE] That is, as said in earlier posts, probably the case because I sometimes confuse piano composing with guitar composing. [QUOTE=Neon-Knight;34297071]I'm not a huge fan of the melodic line at 1:42. To me it's too [i]perpetuum mobile[/i], but that could be just taste. I would personally put in a few rests in there, make it come back in on off-beats to give it a bit more kick. [/QUOTE] I thought of that too and you're probably right with the idea, but when I wrote the melody I thought of a fast-paced "battle" between drums and the two piano lines which is why I decided to keep the rests out of the melody. [QUOTE=Neon-Knight;34297071]I don't hear enough of the orchestra. I hear 1, sometimes 2 lines of synth strings, which isn't really the same. (It could just be low in the mix, or whatever) An orchestra has four sections - strings, woodwind, brass, and percussion. You could make much more use of brass, woodwind, and orchestral percussion. Heavy brass is usually really powerful, and woodwind is often used for lighter passages or lines. You have enough metal percussion, so I wouldn't use much orchestral percussion besides timpani. Try coming up with some imaginitive orchestrations to flesh out some chords with different instruments, double some lines with brass, or add some large stabbing chords on strong or weak beats to give a sense of grandeur. At the moment, I'm just not hearing the "orchestral" part of your orchestral metal song. [/QUOTE] As you may have noticed, the instruments I used are all MIDI (except for the drums: I used a drum computer for those). I had a brass-line in it when I wrote it but it just sounded awful. I kept the piano though because that's one of the few MIDI-sounds that sound okay. [QUOTE=Neon-Knight;34297071]I guess orchestral music is more my thing so I've commented more on that than the metal aspect, but I do think your riff is cool. If you could pull off the orchestral sound a bit more, you might get a decent neoclassical/prog metal sound going, or perhaps some kind of symphonic power metal. Anyway I thought the piece was cool, keep at it.[/QUOTE] Thanks a lot and thank you for your constructive criticism.

just kinda sounds like a generic battle song from a JRPG. the bad midi piano didn't help anything.

Very third rate sounding instruments! Use a better program !