The Terminators: Army of Legend (Feat: Spyro & Rainbow Dash) or: How I learned to stop worrying and - General

[IMG]http://i.imgur.com/5lkax1N.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i.imgur.com/pv8B3Up.jpg[/IMG] So it has come to my attention that there is a fanfiction titled: "The Terminators: Army of Legend" and I believe it is the most catastrophically and beautifully crafted tale of this generation. Of course, by that I mean it's the scariest shit I've ever laid my eyes on. First - let's take a look at some highlights from the summarized version: [quote][B]DISCLAIMER: NOT ABOUT THE ROBOTIC TERMINATORS![/B] It started off with the Terminators' first enemy, the LKA...or Little Kid Army, which was me protesting against my siblings love of the 'stupid' shows on Nick Jr: Dora the Explorer, Bob the Builder, etc. All these 'kiddie' characters came under one banner as well, an opposing force known as the LKA. Because of sibling rivalry, I also usually pit my bro as the leader of this 'evil' army. ... From the start, I had a bad feeling about the 2008 United States election, disliking everyone who was running, and thus developed another antagonistic force, the Maxia, with "radical 44th President Barry Mabao" leading the charge as he attacked United States citizens and framed the Terminators for it, building up to the Second Civil War, a war that occurred between 2010 and 2013. ... A collective known as the "High Command", which currently consists of Alex (me), Spyro (my wing-second and second-in-command), Piermont (my dragon, since I'm a Rider), Cynder (Spyro's...and my...mate, also my wing-fourth), Terrias (a servine in a trench coat wielding a shotgun), Rainbow Dash (another mate, the 'main' one, of mine, and my wing-third), and Ruby, a bottlenose dolphin that I rescued and befriended in my wonderland. ... Where Zack Dawson has been killed, his dream city of "Eden" and the superweapon "ADAM", which A: he was using to control the Mass Effect Reapers (earlier storyline), and B: he was using to initiate WWIII in an attempt to bring about world peace by eliminating the need for religion has been destroyed.[/quote] As we can see here, it has NOTHING to do with the robotic terminators. And he appears to draw heavy inspiration from legendary authors such as [I]parkourdude91[/I] and [I]Christian Weston Chandler[/I]. He has combined their literary styles of religious conservatism into one angst-filled saga. The entire series of stories has about 1-2 views per glorious tale and yet contain a surprisingly large amount of reviews. Let's look further into this, shall we? [t]http://a.pomf.se/bokzhg.png[/t] Oh... Oh no. From the literary, tortured genius of this 16 y/o who claims to have been inspired from a lifetime of stress and tension and whom only wants to captivate us through his personal trials; we have this epic and uncensored novel, akin to a modern Anne Frank's Diary: [URL="https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9066332/1/The-Terminators-Army-of-Legend-Volume-I-Inception"]The Terminators: Army of Legend - Volume I: Inception[/URL] [URL="https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7559896/1/The-Terminators-Army-of-Legend-Volume-II-Rise-of-the-Terminators"]The Terminators: Army of Legend - Volume II: Rise of the Terminators[/URL] [URL="https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8501120/1/The-Terminators-Army-of-Legend-Origin-of-Terrias"]The Terminators: Army of Legend: Origin of Terrias (Volume 3 is missing, so take this instead.)[/URL] [URL="https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8568387/1/The-Terminators-Army-of-Legend-Volume-IV-The-Second-Civil-War"]The Terminators: Army of Legend - Volume IV: The Second Civil War[/URL] [URL="https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9876282/1/The-Terminators-Army-of-Legend-Volume-V-Lazarus-Rising"]The Terminators: Army of Legend - Volume V: Lazarus Rising[/URL] If this is the wrong section then please move it to the appropriate area. Please and thank you!

[quote]The bright white shirt he wore reflected the sunlight into his eyes, and even though it was really bright, he just squinted his eyes.[/quote] John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met. Beautiful writing/10.

still not as 'good' as fallout equestria, by simple virtue that I don't think anybody has paid real money to purchase this shit

I can just feel my face drifting apart as I read this.

[QUOTE=Smashing Good;46732674]still not as 'good' as fallout equestria, by simple virtue that I don't think anybody has paid real money to purchase this shit[/QUOTE] Never mind paying for it, that shit got printed. [img]http://img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20131204174247/falloutequestria/ru/images/3/37/Fallout_equestria_book_set_by_skillfulist-d5fzobk-1-.jpg[/img]

Oh boy, here's another one to the pile. Reminds me that I never went deeper into the whole STALKER: Call of Pony crap I dug up years ago. [editline]17th December 2014[/editline] I no fuck this it's a 90s kid obsessions fic I can tell it already.

You can already see the autism leaking just by looking at the cover.

Beautiful. Oscar Wilde is a witless twat in comparison to the raw poetic elegance of Sir Areis Lionheart.

literally longer than the holy bible itself

[QUOTE=RedStar;46736104]literally longer than the holy bible itself[/QUOTE] praise he, sir areis lionheart, our lord and savior

A sixteen year old sperg into bestiality and obsessed with the numerous first world problems of a white middle-class American teenager writes a 854,008 semi-erotic fan fiction starring his pony and dragon lovers and himself as a class one self-insert Mary Sue dragon rider jesus up pitted against a strawman liberal stand-in for president Obama. Some might call this a nightmare. I call it good readin'

This tops "My Immortal" in cringiness just due to the sheer length of the fanfiction (If you transfer words to page amount that's well over 1700 pages total. But that's assuming you base your calculations on the dimensions of an average formal book page in a published novel) and that it got printed :v: .

For a religious nut, that sure is s nontraditional relationship he's in.

Someone needs to narrate this. There's no fucking way I'm reading all of this, as brilliant as it is. [url]https://www.fictionpress.com/u/813111/Sir-Areis-Lionheart[/url] He also seems to have a FictionPress account which provides background on Cherub and Piermont, two characters featured in this masterpiece.

I looked it up quickly on youtube to see if I could find any references and [URL="https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=army+of+legend"]oh god it's there too[/URL] long-ass videos of call of duty and halo OSTs strung together for a "theoretical videogame" based on this successful franchise

[QUOTE=DiscoMelon;46737923]A sixteen year old sperg into bestiality and obsessed with the numerous first world problems of a white middle-class American teenager writes a 854,008 semi-erotic fan fiction starring his pony and dragon lovers and himself as a class one self-insert Mary Sue dragon rider jesus up pitted against a strawman liberal stand-in for president Obama. Some might call this a nightmare. I call it good readin'[/QUOTE] I see awkward kids and know they'll probably grow out of it, but there's no growing out of this

jesus, I remember this, some of the cringiest shit I've read in a while :v: [quote]long-ass videos of call of duty and halo OSTs strung together for a "theoretical videogame" based on this successful franchise[/quote] You can't be serious. The only thing any more cringy than this that I've read was that one Doom fic where 'and then John was a zombie' became a thing.

I am up to chapter 7 of the first volume and dear god what the hell is happening.

I'm going to try and read this. Wish me luck, gentlemen.

Just made a horrifying discovery. In the description for his custom soundtrack, he links to a wikia for his story. [url]http://terminatormilitia.wikia.com/[/url] I checked the "recent wikia activity" for the last few months. [b]There's nobody else editing this but him.[/b] He's doing nothing but correcting 88 extremely detailed articles, and regularly creating more. No comments. No other users. This is just from one page - the wiki article on himself. [quote]He is described as being tall, thin, but muscular, with cold, soulless blue eyes, long, dark brown, almost black hair, and deeply battlescarred. The right side of his face and body suffers from burn scars as a result of two separate instances, and his back and chest are covered in scars from blades.[/quote] [quote]His primary dress uniform resembles the black SS officer uniforms of Nazi Germany, only with the original Terminator flag as the armband, instead of the Nazi one, and the golden Terminator Eagle as a pin on his cap,[/quote] [quote]Soon after his escape, both he and Rainbow Dash were rushed into surgery as they suffered from blood loss and shock on account of his severed arm, and her being impaled on a steel support rod. [/quote] Later, fucks the dolphin and gets her pregnant. [quote]The night after harvesting the soul of Deitus, and by seemingly impossible means, Ruby was impregnated by Alex with a child that is presumed to carry the soul of Deitus, following the prophecy of the Old Regime. [/quote] This is one page. There's an extremely detailed article for each character, location, event, group, etc. I'm scared. [editline]21st December 2014[/editline] [QUOTE=Zonesylvania;46762144]jesus, I remember this, some of the cringiest shit I've read in a while :v:[/QUOTE] You remember it? Has it already been posted somewhere? Looking at all of the profiles, stories, videos, etc there's no comments on anything, only a few views which are probably Alex. [editline]21st December 2014[/editline] For extra shits & giggles, here's only a few names of the roster of members in the Terminator Militia. [b]Great Commander Alex Vaughn[/b] [b]General (1 Star) Simba the Lion[/b] [b]General (1 Star) Nala the Lioness[/b] [b]Sergeant Major Crash Bandicoot[/b] [b]Major Sonic the Hedgehog[/b] [b]Colonel Rudolph the Reindeer[/b] [b]Lieutenant Commander Spyro the Dragon[/b] [b]2nd Lieutenant Rainbow Dash[/b] [b]Private Garrus Vakarian[/b] And introducing OC donut steel, [b]General (5 Star) Rapid the Skunk[/b]

With any luck, I'm going to narrate this series in the coming weeks. Every. Line.

[QUOTE=kyle877;46768000]With any luck, I'm going to narrate this series in the coming weeks. Every. Line.[/QUOTE] I fear for your sanity.

[QUOTE=kyle877;46768000]With any luck, I'm going to narrate this series in the coming weeks. Every. Line.[/QUOTE] I can tag along with you for the sake of maintaining sanity. No person deserves to riff on this crap on their own, plus I have past experience.

[QUOTE=croguy;46776751]I can tag along with you for the sake of maintaining sanity. No person deserves to riff on this crap on their own, plus I have past experience.[/QUOTE] The more the merrier. Shoot me a PM with your contact information.

[QUOTE=kyle877;46777169][QUOTE=croguy;46776751]I can tag along with you for the sake of maintaining sanity. No person deserves to riff on this crap on their own, plus I have past experience.[/QUOTE] The more the merrier. Shoot me a PM with your contact information.[/QUOTE] ooh ooh I will join!

oh my god this is hilarious we have to narrate it

[QUOTE=kyle877;46777169]The more the merrier. Shoot me a PM with your contact information.[/QUOTE] Sent you a message too. I asked this in the PM already but do you guys want to narrate individually per-chapter or per-character? Chapter would be easiest to organize but each of us voicing a character would be most hilarious. [editline]23rd December 2014[/editline] OH MY GOD HE MADE A VIDEOGAME [media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tyhoI1YEqqo[/media]

So Turtleey and I have been talking and we wanna try to get a bunch of people together to do a group dramatic reading, with different people voicing different characters. Music and effects will probably be added in post. If you're interested in it, PM me.

[QUOTE=kyle877;46780166]So Turtleey and I have been talking and we wanna try to get a bunch of people together to do a group dramatic reading, with different people voicing different characters. Music and effects will probably be added in post. If you're interested in it, PM me.[/QUOTE] Hit you up on steam. It'd be best to get a TS3 or a Skype group for narration.

Depending on when this narration takes place, I might be able to join in.