• French Sex Toy Site Offers Free Vibrators to Diablo III Widows
    49 replies, posted
[quote][b]Get an electric boyfriend if yours is busy adventuring.[/b] In case you missed it, Diablo III came out this week. Sort of. But as the inevitable server issues inevitably get sorted out and the game becomes playable in its brilliant and addictive glory, there will always be those left behind in the real world as we venture into the Burning Hells. French sex toy website Absoloo then had a brilliant idea: Surely there would be tons of women whose boyfriends and husbands were too consumed with Diablo to fulfill their carnal need, so why not give them something to do the trick in the meantime? On the Absoloo blog, the site offers a free "small vibrator" to anyone who had lost their partner to nights of searching for magical jewels that aren't thinly veiled euphemisms for the clitoris. All you have to do is take a picture of yourself alongside the game of Diablo III in question and post it to the website's Facebook page, and you'll be contacted with a code to get your complimentary sex toy. Presumably, you must also be French to qualify. While I think this is an absolutely brilliant marketing stunt, I do have some problems with it. For one, I know a ton of women who are themselves playing D3, whether solo or with their significant others. Would they still be eligible? An Absoloo representative did clarify that the "small" vibrators were "not exclusively for girls," so one could imagine that Diablo III widowers could get in on the action too. For another - how is Absoloo going to make any money off of this? It's fantastic publicity, but it's also going to be giving away hundreds if not thousands of dollars of merchandise, since it's not exactly difficult to take a picture with the game (or a screenshot for the digital version), even if it's not yours. I guess it could always be shooting for the "repeat customer" market, though. Either way, this is genius and hilarious. If only we lived in France. Merde.[/quote] [url]http://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/117312-French-Sex-Toy-Site-Offers-Free-Vibrators-to-Diablo-III-Widows[/url]
No! don't, it's the devil trying to make you vibrate in hell!
[quote]Either way, this is genius and hilarious.[/quote] Took the words right out of my mouth.
[quote] the site offers a free "small vibrator"/[quote] Are they saying that all Diablo fans have tiny dicks?
Um, my dad is the only one here playing Diablo 3 can I still get a free vibrator
I would take advantage of this wonderful free offer if they had international shipping.
i am a widow send me my army of vibrators
My girlfriend read this somewhere and complained to me that it's irritating that they do not realise that there are women who play Diablo III too, and that they should be giving something to men in the same situation as well. (umg sexism) Ugh.
[QUOTE=TehMentos;36002979]My girlfriend read this somewhere and complained to me that it's irritating that they do not realise that there are women who play Diablo III too, and that they should be giving something to men in the same situation as well. (umg sexism) Ugh.[/QUOTE] What? A FPer with a girlfriend?
[QUOTE=TehMentos;36002979]My girlfriend read this somewhere and complained to me that it's irritating that they do not realise that there are women who play Diablo III too, and that they should be giving something to men in the same situation as well. (umg sexism) Ugh.[/QUOTE] I would appreciate a Diablo III flesh-light...
[QUOTE=sirdownloadsalot;36002997]I would appreciate a Diablo III flesh-light...[/QUOTE] Fuck the devil
[QUOTE=AceOfDivine;36003038]Fuck the devil[/QUOTE] Diablo III fleshlight: Make the devil [I][B]YOUR[/B] bitch[/I].
[QUOTE=DrasarSalman;36002994]What? A FPer with a girlfriend?[/QUOTE] I really think this is getting unfunny.
[QUOTE=TehMentos;36003168]I really think this is getting unfunny.[/QUOTE] Not to mention it's playing into misandrist macho BS, "you're less of a man if you don't have a girlfriend" etc.
Soul stone shaped vibrators, enough to make woman turn Diablo.
I'd like it. Too bad I'm not french.
Genius.
[QUOTE=TehMentos;36002979]they should be giving something to men in the same situation as well. [/QUOTE] Throw a rubber band in the box
That would be a good reason for me to buy Diablo 3. A friend of mine is having her birthday in a couple of months and that would kill 2 birds with a stone.
They act like if a guys girlfriend wants sex, he wont take that opportunity (at least between chapters)
[QUOTE=Rhenae;36003386]They act like if a guys girlfriend wants sex, he wont take that opportunity (at least between chapters)[/QUOTE] Can't he have sex while playing it?
We always get the best ideas.
[QUOTE=Van-man;36003076]Diablo III fleshlight: Make the devil [I][B]YOUR[/B] bitch[/I].[/QUOTE] Game unrelated but: Devil May Cry
[QUOTE=Zet;36003407]Can't he have sex while playing it?[/QUOTE] Only if he leaves his TeamSpeak on :v:
[QUOTE=Zet;36003407]Can't he have sex while playing it?[/QUOTE] Now [I]THAT'S[/I] thinking with your dipstick.
[QUOTE=Appolox;36003311]Soul stone shaped vibrators, enough to make woman turn Diablo.[/QUOTE] And when you turn it on, Deckard Cain says, "Stay awhile... and vibrate!" Or something.
oh france, you so crazy
[QUOTE=Penultimate;36003891]And when you turn it on, Deckard Cain says, "Stay awhile... and vibrate!" Or something.[/QUOTE] For some reason, I can't get the line that[I] The Butcher[/I] from Diablo 1 says out of my head: [I]"Ahhh, fresh meat."[/I]
[QUOTE=Van-man;36003976]For some reason, I can't get that line that[I] The Butcher[/I] from Diablo 1 says out of my head: [I]"Ahhh, fresh meat."[/I][/QUOTE] Are you kidding? That terrified the fuck out of me and I was sort of expecting it. Imagine what that would do to some poor girl rubbing herself?
Is Diablo 3 any good? Because the thread in GD is just a giant clusterfuck.
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