Scientists to map Ozzy Osbourne's genes to find out how he's still alive after drug abuse - Polidicks

[url]http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/Showbiz-News/Ozzy-Osbournes-Genes-Mapped-To-Find-Out-How-Hes-Still-Alive-After-Drink-And-Drug-Abuse/Article/201006215648812?lpos=Showbiz_News_Article_Body_Copy_Region_0[/url] [release]Scientists are to map Ozzy Osbourne's genetic code in a bid to find out how he is still alive after decades of drug and alcohol abuse. The former Black Sabbath frontman is only one of a few people in the world to have his full genome analysed. It is hoped the results from the £27,000 test, which takes three months, will provide information on how drugs are absorbed in the body. Ozzy, 61, has lived a life that would presumably kill any ordinary person. Even the singer himself cannot understand how he has survived this long, recently describing himself as a "medical miracle" after going on a "bender" for "40 years". He has admitted drinking four bottles of cognac a day at one point, "blacking out, coming to again and carrying on". Ozzy famously bit the head off a bat while performing with Black Sabbath and in 2003 broke his neck in a quad bike accident. He also has a genetic disorder similar to Parkinson's disease and on at least one occasion has been committed to a mental institution. Despite all his excesses, he is still with wife Sharon, who he once tried to strangle, and the couple have three grown-up children. Now he may get some answers from US company Knome, which will use a blood sample to map his genome. Nathan Pearson, director of research at the firm, said: "Sequencing and analysing individuals with extreme medical histories provides the greatest potential scientific value." The results will hopefully help scientists understand why the bodies of hard-living rockers such as Ozzy, Keith Richards, Ronnie Wood and Iggy Pop are able to take more substance abuse than the average person.[/release] They should have done Keith Richards instead.

[QUOTE=article]The results will hopefully help scientists understand why the bodies of hard-living rockers such as Ozzy, Keith Richards, Ronnie Wood and Iggy Pop are able to take more substance abuse than the average person. [/QUOTE] Maybe it's because they're more hardcore than the average person

I think that bat head might of given him a couple of decades of life.

the fountain of youth was always just a cave covered in bats

Keith Richards snorted his dad, they should have tested him.

Its cause they're British. There I solved a question that costs £27,000 to answer. Pay up Ozzy.

Maybe he has a liver of a blue whale...

Lol, the title is hilarious.

This is so awesome.

[QUOTE=PrismatexV8;22624928] They should have done Keith Richards instead.[/QUOTE] Keith Richards hardly qualifies as "Alive".

Now I can take as many drugs as Ozzy and still live. I love science.

These scientists should use their talents to map Dio's genes and see why the true greats always die young. I do not mean to kick up an Ozzy vs Dio shitstorm

[QUOTE=Penguiin;22625138]Lol, the title is hilarious.[/QUOTE] It sounds like a line from Family Guy

[QUOTE=Jmax;22625732]It sounds like a line from Family Guy[/QUOTE] It seems like something you'd see on The Onion's ticker.

[QUOTE=Zeke129;22625750]It seems like something you'd see on The Onion's ticker.[/QUOTE] pretty much

[QUOTE=Zeke129;22625707]These scientists should use their talents to map Dio's genes and see why the true greats always die young. I do not mean to kick up an Ozzy vs Dio shitstorm[/QUOTE] die young? wasn't he like 70?

[QUOTE=Penguiin;22625811]die young? wasn't he like 70?[/QUOTE] 67 but old for Dio wouldn't have started until he was at least 160

:20bux: says they can't figure it out

Being a Rockstar automatically gives you +15 Drug Resistance.

All we need next, is to analyze the rest of people who push the limits of nature and steal their genes to breed a race of super human Rock-stars.

Yeah, they take a blood sample, 40% drugs, 58% alcohol, 1% rock, 1% blood

[QUOTE=Metaphysix;22630034]All we need next, is to analyze the rest of people who push the limits of nature and steal their genes to breed a race of super human Rock-stars.[/QUOTE] Just get some genes from the Beatles for the musical creativity, and Ozzy Ozbourne genes for the longlevity.

[url]http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/health/article7139267.ece[/url] [img]http://www.timesonline.co.uk/multimedia/archive/00722/Ozzy3385_722936a.jpg[/img] [QUOTE=Eluveitie;22630080]Just get some genes from the Beatles for the musical creativity, and Ozzy Ozbourne genes for the longlevity.[/QUOTE] Don't forget the Eno genes for production genius

[QUOTE=Octo pie;22630075]Yeah, they take a blood sample, 40% drugs, 58% alcohol, 1% rock, 1% blood[/QUOTE] I think you got confused. I think you actually mean is 100% metal :rock:

[QUOTE=DaveP;22630144][url]http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/health/article7139267.ece[/url][/QUOTE] [quote]I’m not exactly Steve Jobs when it comes to computers[/quote] I lol'd pretty hard at this one

[QUOTE=ButtsexV2;22630246]I lol'd pretty hard at this one[/QUOTE] I didn't think it was possible to be that inept at computers.

[QUOTE=DaveP;22630144][url]http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/health/article7139267.ece[/url][/QUOTE] That was a good read. Funny too.

[QUOTE=DaveP;22630144][url]http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/health/article7139267.ece[/url] [img]http://www.timesonline.co.uk/multimedia/archive/00722/Ozzy3385_722936a.jpg[/img] Don't forget the Eno genes for production genius[/QUOTE] You know last time they did this they got killer bees.

[QUOTE=bravehat;22630235]I think you got confused. I think you actually mean is 100% metal :rock:[/QUOTE] You beat me to it :v:

[QUOTE=Mr. Someguy;22629896]Being a Rockstar automatically gives you +15 Drug Resistance.[/QUOTE] Still, you get the -15 Shotgun resistance malus.