Punishment for having bad grades, does this really works? - General

I know that some parents out there tend to punish their child when the report cards come in the mail and noticed how bad your grades are when you get an C- or below, from light to heavy punishment depending on how bad the grades are. I have experience in this during my middle school years, the worst years of my life. My mother noticed my bad grades and tend to take away my consoles and controls until my next report card comes in with better grades which hardly came as I've always having problem during middle school over bullying, trouble, and all shorts of chaos. Do you think that this is effecting the kids in any way? In my personal opinion, it's not effective for me.

It depends on the kid and the punishment. Some punishment is always important, as is encouragement, and depending on the personality of the kid you might have to lean heavier on positive reinforcement or negative reinforcement. Know your kid. Harsh punishments or making the kid feel unloved or like a failure is unacceptable though. It's ok to be disappointed, it's ok to take away your consoles at worst too even if they are too big of a distraction, but make sure the kid knows he or she is loved strongly anyway.

do your shit and you wont get bad grades its not a hard concept seriously

[QUOTE=Death_God;40762699]do your shit and you wont get bad grades its not a hard concept seriously[/QUOTE] Well... If you don't do your shit well/your shit is actually shit, won't that also get you bad grades? It really depends on the person to be honest. I remember that when I was younger and my father took away my computer, I would just spend most of my time sleeping. I regret so much from when I was younger.

[QUOTE=Death_God;40762699]do your shit and you wont get bad grades its not a hard concept seriously[/QUOTE] It's hard to get good grades when you don't get the subject, and you have a bad memory when you do test like spelling bees, and you forgot to turn in your homework that was due today. Math was my worst because I end up getting things wrong, and try to ask for help when the help that I get was not really useful, and he/she can't really help me out when he/she is busy with other kids. Not only that but bullying becomes a major distraction when it comes down to getting work done, when someone is pestering the fuck out of you, and you want the teacher or someone else to take care of it, but the problems always comes back. That is how bad it was during my middle school years and I have a bad memory process and am a slow learner depending on certain concepts. I was bad at math that i failed my junior year on math and have to do this after-school class during senior year to pass. I hated math because of all this complex shit that I don't get and receive less help. Other subjects like history, science, and computer technology and other classes I don't have much of a problem with depending on certain subjects, I listen more and more, but have a bad member and don't do well when it comes down to paper test, when I copy notes I've tend to write down EVERY SINGLE THING, otherwise I will end up missing something that belong in a test and end up missing if my test allow us to use our notes.

Whenever I was punished for anything relating to school (which was mostly the teacher's fucking faults because they were all incompetent fuckers who were either just plain bad or out to get me because I'd call them out on their bullshit or tell my parents) I'd do something twice as bad as what they had punished me for just to spite them. I always skipped music class or refused to do work and spend my time drawing or sleeping after my teacher threatened to fail me for not singing along with the class. Point is, punishing children doesn't always work. [editline]24th May 2013[/editline] Whenever someone didn't turn their homework in they'd have to sit out during break on the "wall of shame". I never stayed on that wall even if I knew it wasn't my teacher's fault that my homework wasn't turned in (which was rare). I stopped ever even doing my homework after some time. I'd not bring gym clothes so I didn't have to change and be around underclothed people, though part of though part of the reason why I never participated was to spite my gym teacher after he punished me for tearing down the circle. If you're anything like me, punishment will only want to make you get revenge or do worse on purpose.

The same can be said about the U.S. prison system, too, retributive justice only works if you're looking to damage someone instead of putting them back into society as corrected individuals.

I got good grades and didn't do shit in high school. So in my own anecdotal experience, I think grades are a giant pile of horse shit that don't accurately weigh a kid's intelligence. Grades, in my opinion, do nothing but teach a student that learning is something you have to "work for" and that you are judged on. Which is utter nonsense. If you punish a kid for bad grades, are you doing nothing but reinforcing this terrible precedent of public education? Of course you fucking make mistakes. People make mistakes. Some of the greatest scientific theories came from mistakes. If we force this idea of "perfect all the time, or never good at any time" it will only help to detour kids from thinking learning is fun. Which should be the ultimate goal of education to begin with. You should never punish, but rather guide in the right direction. If a kid is making bad grades, clearly he finds learning as a chore. Be a damn parent and make him realize that it should be something enjoyable. Don't punish him and make it worse.

[QUOTE=gokiyono;40763024]Well... If you don't do your shit well/your shit is actually shit, won't that also get you bad grades? It really depends on the person to be honest. I remember that when I was younger and my father took away my computer, I would just spend most of my time sleeping. I regret so much from when I was younger.[/QUOTE] Yeah, authoritarianism backfired on me too. I very quickly resented and hated my dad and I cherished the time I had with my mom because my mom let me do what I want and treated me like a human being and my dad treated me like his pet or slave and "punished" me for things. Honestly though, when I was punished I pretty much just slept all the time and then went back to just doing it again. It was worth it to prove my point that you can't push me around - sort of like Scorched Earth strategy in World War 2 - when the Germans were attacking the Russians, the russians would burn their land as they retreated so the Germans would gain absolutely nothing from it. That's sort of the mentality I have towards punishment. To top it off, I'm now an agorist and advocate of unschooling. (google awaits!)

[QUOTE=Death_God;40762699]do your shit and you wont get bad grades its not a hard concept seriously[/QUOTE] Yeh... do your shit, but what happens when that shit becomes diarrhea then you get punished for making a mess that was out of our control? Ive had questions in my A-levels where one of the big 6 mark questions and i honestly hadnt been taught anything to do with the question...

I never found it much of an incentive. I always found elementary school and high school boring and unengaging, and got pretty bad grades because I almost never bothered to do homework and was usually berated or punished. The topics were humdrum and not educational, and often times the teachers themselves weren't particularly well educated on the topic criteria. Honestly I've learned far more history, math, english, biology, trades skills, etc than I ever did in school just by reading articles in books and on the internet. Even then I wasn't being graded.

I don't think "punishing" is the best way. Things like making your kid do their homework before playing video games, and guiding them is more effective. My step brother got some bad grades once and his dad took him down to the homeless shelter and gave him a speech about how he will end up like that if he doesn't get his shit together. His grades have gotten a lot better :v:

I always got shit grades, mainly because i didn't give a shit, i felt that they were trying to spoonfeed me information, rather than actually teach. Regardless, i was still punished for my bad grades, and all it did was add another layer of stress to my day. Punishing someone for bad grades is a form of negative reinforcement, which tends to make people hate their parents/guardians/teachers. It gets nothing done, a stressed student is a student that isn't thinking clearly. I never could think clearly, my stress levels were so high during school times that i just ignored people, so i've never developed a true social life, leaving me socially awkward towards everyone, even my parents. To finish this, punishing someone to get good grades in the event that they get bad ones does far more harm than good. EDIT: To clarify, i have since pulled my head from my ass, and am taking school much more seriously, although i wish i did when i was 12.