Dear Journal (Day in the life of a Storm Trooper on the Death Star.) - General

I decided to go into writing. After a bit I decided to write a Sci-Fi comedy Slice of life, About a stormtrooper's hard day on the Death Star. If you remember the scene in Star Wars 4 when Luke and the others first enter the Death Star, that's the background of this short story. And yes this is for the Star Wars Fans. Dear Journal by. Sean Martin [i]Dear Journal, Today was a hectic mess on this space station. I was in the lunch room having my usual slice of cheese from Jabba's Hut and a Cantina Dew. When I heard on my helmet radio, “This is a message to all Stormtroopers, report to the south landing bay immediately!” So I, being pissed that I can’t eat my pizza, rushed to the landing bay to see what the hell was going on. After checking map after map to see if I was going the right way, I reached the landing bay to see no one there. So, verily pissed off, I took a transport car to my apartment. There I decided to take a nap to forget that these idiots made me miss out on my pizza, (which some asshole probably eating right now.) As I walked by my window I saw something that looked like some kind of walking carpet or some fucked up chia pet or whatever. I shrugged it off my mind and just went to my room. After 10 minutes I hear on my Helmet, “INTRUDERS ON THE PRISON LEVEL!!!” So, I grabbed my blaster and rushed to the Prison level were some chick was being held. Vader told us that she was important to us. so we kept her alive. (I tried asking her on a date but got an old fashioned kick to the groin.) Anyway, I made it there to see my dead comrades on the ground while a group of unknown people escaped down the garbage chute. I, thinking they’d be crushed by the compactor, walk off to the local vending machine to get a bag of Munchos (Yummy :3) When on the intercom, “INTRUDERS ON THE SOUTH LANDING BAY!” I rushed to there to see, two guys blasting the other troopers, and Commander Vader fighting some old dude with laser swords. Vader pwned the old guy and the others escaped. After that most of us were on clean up duty, cleaning the blood and corpses. After cleaning up the Bay and stopping at a DeathStarbucks, I decided to head home. After watching the Tatooine Pod Races, I went to my room and decided to write my day in you. Talk to you later Journal. -Mickey the Stormtrooper[/i] C&C would be nice. EDIT: I just read the Creationism Corner Guide. and fix'd some mistakes. Credit to -Trase- for editing help.

I would change the names of some of the shops. They probably don't have a subway, mountain dew, or DeathStarbucks (although I like that one =D)

Well, I'll think of some star wars-esqe names.

A couple of things: 1. Inconsistency, at one moment he says he had a sandwich, and then he said somthing about pizza. Unless he's a greedy stormtrooper. 2.There wouldn't be all that mutch blood, seeing as blasters semi-cauterise wounds, especially through stromtrooper armour, but not fully. And they have random robots to clean the Deathstar. which means he volenteered and is actually a friendly, humble, well thinking Stormtrooper. From this I could make a whole back story to him.

Elements didn't like the Subway idea so I changed that to Pizza from Jabba's Hut. same thing for mountain dew I changed for cantina dew. [editline]02:28PM[/editline] And I wanted to make Mickey a whiny guy. Like Freeman's Mind kinda. Im actually planning a follow up for when the Death Star Blows up. Also this is my way of introduction in writing. Mickey is like a girl writing in her diary.

Nice, but you do know they're all clones. I don't believe they can think "outside of the box".

Think a stormtrooper that whines a lot, and eats pizza and goes to Deathstarbucks. I didnt want to get technical like the series and follow the story line (with prequels) So I just re-imagined it my way a bit.