• The answer you all have been looking for - Casusv3. The man-god.
    2 replies, posted
First of all, let me ensure you, this thread can be viewed without fear of abortion or heart failure. It was simplified for the simple minds and hearts of this forum. Let us begin with the background of Casusv3. First of all, Casusv3 has no name. The Casusv3 does not need norishment, because he is a self-sustainable robotic-organism capable of massive hypertrophy. The Casusv3 does not need stimuli to make his muscles grow, he's whole essence is composed of muscles and a brain attached by more, hypertrophic, type II b fibers. By now, I suppose your brain is producing unbelievable amount of chemicals to sustain such ungod-like features. It is normal, I felt the same way too. The journey of what I at first, thought was unbelievably terrorising, turned out to be, actually, the road to enlightenment. I met Casusv3 when I was hiking with over 9000lbs of equipment on my pinky, and was barely making it through the last 200 meters of the Everest. Shit, I was barely breathing. Then, all of a sudden, a very firm looking, yet so unsightful man appeared before me. He asked, [i]need help with that, son?[/i] and I replied with a grin and told him to fuck off. He grunted, and thrusted a fist of what I couldn't even imagine 10,000 gods could punch at me. I was in total system shock, I felt like losing control of my limbs. But then I saw it. He wasn't your ordinary, unsightful human-being, he was a very skillful, trainee. His palms were rugged, just like mine were. His muscles were bulging, just like mine were. He feared nothing, and could sustain himself without an air mask on the Everest, just like I could. One thing was different though - his eyes. His eyes were full of a spark of which I have never seen before. In all my years of training rookies, I never seen anyone close to that. It was as if he was.. [i]enlightened[/i]. And then I realized, what I have been so unwilling to realize. The Gods are amongest us. They might reside in the sewers, but they are here. They're..He is..[b]Casusv3[/b]. Casusv3, is what I bring to you folks. The simple of minded. The solver of all manly issues. He will solve your shit, without even saying a word. I hereby declare Casusv3, the unformal, [b]troll of knowledge[/b]. I ask of you, to share your inner thoughts and issues, for the Casusv3, to solve. For that, he is amongst us. To help us understand what our miniscule brains can't. the Casusv3 has one basic rule though, his brain cannot process more than 3 questions a day. Keep that in mind. The 4th question will wipe out his circuits, and he'll be gone forever. Use whatever time he has left on this earth. Ask what your miniscule brains have been wondering! [i]This message was brought to you thanks to Steam chat services, and of course, the Casusv3.[/i] [highlight](User was banned for this post ("Crap thread" - Jaanus))[/highlight]
Edited by request of Seith: I hereby approve of this.
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