Going Through Massive Philosophical, Life Altering State - Need Help - General

Lately I've become really concerned of my lack of care for anything, and I think I need help. I'm currently going through a rollercoaster of emotions. I went through a massive period of depression from November 2009 to February 2010 and kind of got over that, but now I just seem to go through the motions, and not really care about anything as it passes me by. For example, I have performed very well in school, and much is expected of me, but I just don't see the point anymore. It seems the only reason I should try hard in school and be successful instead of loading my body full of drugs and offing myself is that it would greatly upset my family and put all the support they have given me to waste. I become happy under hyper stimulation of my brain, like new experiences, adrenaline rushes (I BMX and Downhill) and taking in large amounts of information (that is of interest to me). But these just don't really do as much for me these days, and I'm leaning worryingly close to experimenting with many illicit drugs. I'm accepted at school, but I don't really have any close friends anymore, and have never had anything to do with a girl. Just writing this out has made me realize I'm just very afraid of rejection or being bitched about behind my back. I don't go to parties and I don't get out anywhere near as much as I used to. All of this really worries me. I am 100% against aggression, violence, hate and negativity for the sake of your ego. While I say this, I constantly am seeking ways of dealing with something, or someone that is having a negative impact on my life, and I can only come to conclusion that causing them pain or killing them is the only solution, and this really worries me as well. I really just feel there is no point to life anymore, and the only reason I don't off myself is because I care too much about my family and associates (school, etc.) and the effects of me doing something as selfish and suicide would have massive effects on them and make them incredibly sad. I don't want to mention this to my family as it would also make them very sad and worry too much about me and probably invest large sums of money in a psychologist, which I don't know would do much at all. In the end, I need some advice. I want to be back to being happy and caring about myself and my life. I want to be able to have ups and downs again, instead of making sure I stay away from something that could cause that and staying neutral. Just writing this out has just made me realize I do that :(. No tl;dr, only post if you actually care

You're probably just going through a stage, that's all. I had the same thing going, but it's not as bad as it was a while ago. If you need to ask me anything, just PM me. I'll be glad to help.

inb4 "an hero" or "kill yourself"

I wish I could help, but I'm sorta going through the same thing right now too.

[QUOTE=Glitch360;21977263]You're probably just going through a stage, that's all. I had the same thing going, but it's not as bad as it was a while ago.[/QUOTE] This has been going all year, it's really worrying me now.

Kill someone else.

get over it

smoke weed [editline]05:44AM[/editline] not joking, btw it should help

[QUOTE=Yumyumbublegum;21977300]get over it[/QUOTE] It's easy to say but hard to do.

[QUOTE=siberpredaht;21977312]smoke weed[/QUOTE] Leaning concernedly close to this.

Get a girlfriend!

[QUOTE=T.F.W.O.;21977319]It's easy to say but hard to do.[/QUOTE] nope

[QUOTE=The Salmon;21977320]Leaning concernedly close to this.[/QUOTE] go to a therapist.. even though you don't want to. just do it.

dude if you're that upset weed will be the best thing you have ever done just don't do it alone [editline]05:45AM[/editline] [QUOTE=Kayl;21977324]Get a girlfriend![/QUOTE] ps getting a girlfriend will not help

My honest to god solution after years of having the exact same feeling, is smoke weed and play music. Now that may not work for everyone, but the gist of the message is you need to find something to relax you and make you feel content for a while, just try things out. Meditation and yoga actually help out if you feel like gaying it up enough to partake.

yeah, you probably want to get your shit together before you get a girlfriend they're overrated IMO

Except for the drugs and no friends, this is just like me, trying meds though.

You've come to the wrong people for help.

Agreed, you need to talk to a doctor, if you get the right help, it'll change your life around. I am serious.

[QUOTE=Wonky;21977406]You've come to the wrong people for help.[/QUOTE] I don't know anyone else to talk to.

from someone who has been on prozac, zoloft, etc. AND marijuana i suggest marijuana, you don't even have to get completely blown, just pack a bowl as a pick me up to get you through the day and i for one think facepunch can be very helpful

smoke weed

[QUOTE=JDK721;21977337]go to a therapist.. even though you don't want to. just do it.[/QUOTE] What he said.

[QUOTE=siberpredaht;21977443]from someone who has been on prozac, zoloft, etc. AND marijuana i suggest marijuana, you don't even have to get completely blown, just pack a bowl as a pick me up to get you through the day and i for one think facepunch can be very helpful[/QUOTE] were you in the army?

[QUOTE=JDK721;21977472]were you in the army?[/QUOTE] no, but i'm going to fort benning, georgia in the fall

How is this philosophical?

I went through this type of thing. It didn't last. You'll get over it.

[QUOTE=siberpredaht;21977513]no, but i'm going to fort benning, georgia in the fall[/QUOTE] did they know about you being on anti-depressants?

[QUOTE=JDK721;21977596]did they know about you being on anti-depressants?[/QUOTE] didn't tell them anything as far as i know, being on SSRIs makes you ineligible for the military but i'm better now, so i saw no reason to bring it up to make it clear, i didn't lie to them, they just didn't ask anything about medications past like six month or something

[QUOTE=siberpredaht;21977616]didn't tell them anything as far as i know, being on SSRIs makes you ineligible for the military but i'm better now, so i saw no reason to bring it up[/QUOTE] nah, they don't necessarily make you ineligible. they evaluate you and review your mental health records though. it's on a case by case basis. you better hope they don't find out about your anti-depressants.. were you ever hospitalized or visiting a psychologist/psychiatrist? if they do find out then they're going to give you a dishonorable discharge. and also if you ever have a break down then they'll be reviewing your mental health records to see if you've had a history. [editline]02:12AM[/editline] [QUOTE=siberpredaht;21977616]to make it clear, i didn't lie to them, they just didn't ask anything about medications past like six month or something[/QUOTE] you have to be off anti-depressants for at least 1 year before they'll even consider you.. and I'm pretty sure the question is if you've EVER seen a mental health specialist or been on anti-depressants etc. even if it was 8 years ago.