Man fights off four attackers and gets stabbed without dropping his fish and chips - Polidicks

[B]Wisbech attackers 'fought off by landlord holding chips'[/B] A pub landlord trained in martial arts has said he fought off four attackers without dropping his fish and chips. [IMG]http://news.bbcimg.co.uk/media/images/65832000/jpg/_65832494_65832493.jpg[/IMG] [URL]http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-21410565[/URL]

Must've trained in the Jackie Chan School of Baby Holding Martial Arts.

I think this is the most British case of assault I have ever heard of.

He chopped chopped their Cheerios.

Bloody 'ell me bleedin' chips! [img]http://www.facepunch.com/fp/ratings/funny2.png[/img]

Holy shit; he got stabbed in the chest with a screwdriver and STILL didn't drop his fish and chips? The only way to top that would be if he took a chip out of the package and ate it in victory after the battle was won.

[QUOTE=ironman17;39552957]Holy shit; he got stabbed in the chest with a screwdriver and STILL didn't drop his fish and chips? The only way to top that would be if he took a chip out of the package and ate it in victory after the battle was won.[/QUOTE] He did, kind of. [quote]Mr Wood said he drove home and ate his fish and chips - which he managed to keep in one hand the whole time without dropping anything - before telling his partner about the incident.[/quote]

Wonder what would have happened to the attackers had he dropped some of them.

[QUOTE=DainBramageStudios;39552972]He did, kind of. [QUOTE] Mr Wood said he drove home and ate his fish and chips - which he managed to keep in one hand the whole time without dropping anything - before telling his partner about the incident.[/QUOTE][/QUOTE] "OH MY GOD HONEY YOU'RE BLEEDING! WHAT HAPPENED" "DAMNIT WOMAN, WILL YOU LET ME EAT IN PEACE FOR ONCE"

Reminds me of the time someone ran me over and It destroyed my shoes, nearly crushed my feet but I kept hold of my chips,

Fish and chips stained with the blood of victory. Now that would be something amazing.

[quote]he refused to go to hospital but he eventually drove himself there because he said it felt odd.[/quote] I like how relaxed he was

I live in Wisbech, this isn't surprising at all :v: This genuinely happened to me 3 years ago as well, I was walking home with chips in one hand and this guy tried to hit me, I have done karate since I was 9 so I just decked him in an instant without realizing what had happened. It's eerily similar :P

Fish and chips, that and full english is what we won wars on

does he like have a physical resistance buff i mean holy shit he can tank dam- oh wait this is real life woah

Sums up england

[QUOTE=S31-Syntax;39553049]Wonder what would have happened to the attackers had he dropped some of them.[/QUOTE] They wouldn't have survived as he would be able to use all of his concentration and both hands.

[QUOTE]"They said 'we want your wallet' and then my phone rang and they said 'we'll have your phone as well'," he said. "I said, 'If you want it, you'll have to come and get it'.[/QUOTE] What a total badass.

hahah.. fish and chips.. on a more serious note; this guy is going on my list of people to stay away from

[QUOTE=DainBramageStudios;39552972]He did, kind of.[/QUOTE] "Bloody 'ell John wot's all that blood about, then?" "naw, don' worry love, nuffink to be worried about. you know me, i love me bleedin' fish n chips."

SIKE! That were shooting the british version of "What would you do for a Klondike Bar?" but with Fish & Chips instead

As british as it gets.

[QUOTE=pajarojamal;39553379]hahah.. fish and chips.. on a more serious note; this guy is going on my list of people to stay away from[/QUOTE] Nah man, he's a pretty cool guy. Just don't fuck with his chips.

I wonder what the muggers feel like now.

[QUOTE=kanesenpai~;39552873]Must've trained in the Jackie Chan School of Baby Holding Martial Arts.[/QUOTE] He didn't want no trabble!

[QUOTE='[EG] Pepper;39553619']I wonder what the muggers feel like now.[/QUOTE] mugs

[QUOTE='[EG] Pepper;39553619']I wonder what the muggers feel like now.[/QUOTE] Mugs. [editline]11th February 2013[/editline] Oh you motherfucker.

A friend of mine actually posted this on his Facebook actually - seems like an absolutely shitty Plaice.

blimey wot a tuf lad drinks on the 'ouse

Would have been the best story ever if he said "yer goin the right way for a smacked bottom!" Then beat their asses...I have no Idea why I just said that. I think the shrek people have gotten to me... somone help...