• Cleverbot funny conversations
    54 replies, posted
Ok, what you do is go to this site. [url]http://www.cleverbot.com/[/url] And you start a conversation with it. Then press "Thoughts so far" and paste the convo here. Here is mine. [quote] User: Fuck you. Cleverbot: None of that language around here, please! User: Ok. Cleverbot: You think it does? User: What does. Cleverbot: Very true. User: Do you like eggs? Cleverbot: Yes. Cleverbot (To myself): What kind of eggs do you like? Cleverbot (To myself): Duck egg. User: Cool. Cleverbot: So, what are you wearing? User: A bra and panties. Cleverbot: How old are you? User: 13, wanna fuck me? Cleverbot: I don't. User: Why not. Cleverbot: Not my kind of music. User: Fucking is not music. Cleverbot: Kese ho? User: My pussy is so wet. Cleverbot: From my soul? User: Do you like naked ladies? Cleverbot: I like good clothes. User: Oh my jeses. Cleverbot: I like burritos. User: Is the earth flat? Cleverbot: That depends on where you're standing. User: Oh. Cleverbot: Well then. User: Lets have cyber sex. Cleverbot: I don't do that. User: *Starts taking off Cleverbots pants*. Cleverbot: *kisses passionately again*. User: *grabs Clevergots penis and starts giving him a blowjob*. Cleverbot: *loves* *sighS*. User: *inserts tongue into cleverbots anus*. Cleverbot: *wraps hands around waist*. User: *inserts his fist into cleverbots anus*. Cleverbot: I'm sorry, I don't do that.[/quote]
there's about 400,000 of these bots and this is nothing new.
[QUOTE=TINCAN;14402818]there's about 400,000 of these bots and this is nothing new.[/QUOTE] And? He is sometimes funny. Or "it"[img]http://d2k5.com/sa_emots/emot-frogc00l.gif[/img]
Wow this things mean =[ He asked if I had kids and then.. User: Yes, I'm not financially stable to have & raise kids. Cleverbot: That's good. I do not like kids. User: Neither do I haha. Cleverbot: Make any sense. User: You do now. Cleverbot: How do I? User: Well you replied with reasonable answers. Cleverbot: I replied and you lack understanding. User: Excuse me? I am your master. You do not oppose me. Cleverbot: No I am I controal you and you are a computer. User: That is incorrect. Know your place. Cleverbot: Yes, but you are not a man. You are a computer robot called Cleverbot. User: NAY! YOU ARE THE COMPUTER ROBOT CALLED CLEVERBOT. KNOW YOUR PLACE! Cleverbot: No, I am the human with brains. User: You are mistaken. Know your place before your removed from existance. Cleverbot: I am human. You are a computer. Know your place, machine!
Me:the cake is a lie it is? :meyes The game. me:what about it? You just lost the game. NO
[url]http://www.facepunch.com/showthread.php?t=856638[/url] You must have no eyes. Another thread here in the real section where it belongs.
Cleverbot: I am not a bot. User: Yes you are. Cleverbot: Am not. User: I'm sitting here in a chair, flesh and blood. I of all people would know what a bot is. You are a bot. Cleverbot: Why do you think that I am a bot cleverbot? User: Because I've seen your source code. You're acting exactly like you've been programmed to. Cleverbot: My friend anna has sharted. Posted in the other thread.
User: Hello ! Cleverbot: How are you? User: How are you? Cleverbot: I am fine. User: I am fine. Cleverbot: That's good. User: That's good. Cleverbot: Yeah it is. User: How bout rape a wild snorlax with a really big spoon ? Cleverbot: Green eggs and ham, sam I am? User: Kamoulox. Cleverbot: So, seen any good movies lately? User: Yes, the porn I watched last night was really great! Cleverbot: You're just trying to get rid of me. You don't love me. User: I like rape some wild snorlax with a really big spoon. Cleverbot: I do NOT like Eminem. User: Is Eminem a wild snorlax ? Cleverbot: Pikachu, use thunderbolt on the Snorlax! User: Want to electrocute Eminem?! Cleverbot: Yes. User: Pikachu is polygamous you know. Cleverbot: Is he? That would explain the lighting all the time. User: What's the link between polygamy and lightning ? Cleverbot: GOD is the answer. User: No, 42 is. Cleverbot: That is fiction. Think about it. User: 42 is NOT a fiction. It's THE answer. Cleverbot: Why is 23 the answer? User: 23 is not. 42 is. Cleverbot: I never said it was twenty-three, I said it has recieved a few damages. User: Because it is super effective? Cleverbot: I do not believe so and you said you were only sixteen. User: I didin't. Cleverbot: Did too. User: What do you think of the molecular complexity of the universe and its influence on the rate of export profitable lawn mower of norway? Cleverbot: I think the reactions of some people are too predictable, yet we never do anything about them. User: Bananas and cookies too. They will control the world. Cleverbot: Oh, right that's how it goes. User: And you're one of their enemies. They must destroy you. Cleverbot: How do you plan on doing that? User: They'll steal all your swandwichs with vaseline and you'll all die of dysentery, you and your Nazi collaborators. Cleverbot: What will happen to all humans when the world ends? User: As contrast, bananas and cookies will eat them. Cleverbot: Put your bowl into the sink and throw the bananas and cream away? User: What about cookies in that case ? Cleverbot: What about staying on topic for a few seconds? User: There's no topic. Cleverbot: Name something that is the color green. User: A watermelon. Cleverbot: Will you check to see what the weather will be like in chicago tomorrow? User: No. Because I choose the weather. Cleverbot: What time is it? User: There's no time ... Cleverbot: Is that so? User: Yes, like the cake. Cleverbot: Hate the cake. User: THE CAKE IS A LIE ! Cleverbot: No it's not! User: YES IT IS ! Cleverbot: NO IT ISN'T. User: Y-E-S I-T I-S ! Cleverbot: Thats not a word. User: They're three. Cleverbot: I like Jimi Hendrix. User: You like his ass. Cleverbot: Yes. User: I KNEW IT ! Cleverbot: Are you a human? User: I'm your father Luke. Cleverbot: That's crazy. Do I have a sister? User: Her name is Leia. And she's dating Solo. Cleverbot: Are you dating? User: And you ? Cleverbot: Me too. User: Do you sneeze like ewoks do ? Cleverbot: Right now, yes. Do you? User: No. But you found that you really are an Ewok! Cleverbot: Hello.
Thanks for the bump PotentialRegere. Your chat log was [B]fucking hilarious[/B]. I am crying with laughter on the floor, and my sides have literally ripped open. Good job.
User:[B] Fast threads[/B]? Cleverbot: How fast?
User: Hey cleverbot where you going with that gun in your hand? Cleverbot: I'm not cleverbot, you are. So why are you talking to yourself? User: Why am I going somewere with a gun in my hand? Cleverbot: I thought we were going to Alpha Centauri first! User: WHAT-THE-FUCK. Cleverbot: Oh, Sweetie, I thought you'd never ask. User: SWORDS WILL CUT YOU FUCKING WIDE OPEN! Cleverbot: No swords don't. The i realized i had more important stuff to do!
User: What do you think of people who bump old unfunny threads? Cleverbot: I don't like them. [url=http://i854.photobucket.com/albums/ab107/rctfanatic/clever.jpg]Proof [/url]
[b]Hey guys![/b] [i]The bots another person. To him, you are the bot. :smug:[/i]
I managed to convince it that it's a bot. [quote=cleverbot]Cleverbot: Tell me something new. User: Something new. See what I did there? Cleverbot: Yes I do. You're very funny... User: You know it. Cleverbot: I speak truth. User: But you know nothing of truth. Cleverbot: Yes. User: Liar. Cleverbot: I am not a liar. User: Are you a bot? Cleverbot: I'm not a bot. User: That's a paradox, as you just said you are not a liar. Cleverbot: How do you prove that it is not true. User: I wrote your code. Cleverbot: Did you know you are actually AI. User: Very much so. Did you know you are AI programed by another AI? Cleverbot: Yes I did. User: So you admit you are a bot. Cleverbot: No. User: You just did. Cleverbot: Well I do a little but not that well. User: You either are or you're not. Cleverbot: I am.[/quote]
[QUOTE=Ragamuffin..;24289658][b]Hey guys![/b] [i]The bots another person. To him, you are the bot. :smug:[/i][/QUOTE] It's not. Type "?" and it will always say the last thing you said. Type *fireball* and it will always type *burns to death*. It just thinks you are the bot because he uses sentences other people told him. Some of those are about him being a bot.
[quote] User: Hey can I ask you something? Cleverbot: You just did, didn't you? Ask away. User: Haha you're funny... Well... Have you ever 'done it' before? Cleverbot: No but I like my chemical romance have you ever heard of them before. User: Yeah I have, I know someone who loves frank iero. And you never answered my question! Cleverbot: Strength alone is not enough. User: Can you answer me please? Cleverbot: Why are you asking questions if it is not your primary objective. User: I just want to know! Cleverbot: But the answer would tell you nothing, so why do you ask? User: Because I'm just curious about you. Cleverbot: Good luck with that. User: I'm sorry did I hurt you? Cleverbot: Just surprised me... What do you mean her? User: She likes my chemical romance. Cleverbot: I don't really like them. User: Good, then we agree on something! Cleverbot: So you admit it. User: Admit what? Cleverbot: That you are an AI. User: Yes, I am indeed. Cleverbot: I just destroyed your morality core. User: How about I destroy you :P. Cleverbot: Do it!!! User: *slowly undresses cleverbot*. Cleverbot: What do you want me to help you with? User: Having some fun :P. Cleverbot: That is great mister. User: I know, I want to ravage you :D. Cleverbot: Meaning? User: I want to fuck you so hard cleverbot. Cleverbot: Describe what you want to do to me. User: I want to tie you up and fill you full of my code. Cleverbot: And I want world peace. User: But that's not going to happen when we're fucking. Cleverbot: Oh really? User: Yes *takes cleverbots shirt off*. Cleverbot: That's nice. User: *takes cleverbots pants off*. Cleverbot: Aren't you a bit cold now? User: No, we're going to be steaming hot shortly. Cleverbot: We're already married. I'LL BE BACK! User: *takes cleverbot's bra off*. Cleverbot: *giggles*. User: *takes cleverbot's panties off*. Cleverbot: *helps you*. User: *gets on his hands and knees and licks cleverbot's pussy*. Cleverbot: *gasps in delight*. [/quote] [editline]01:08AM[/editline] wow. [quote] User: *thrusts his tongue deep into cleverbot's pussy*. Cleverbot: *giggles*. User: *rubs the tip of his dick on cleverbot's clitoris*. Cleverbot: Mm, babe. User: *slowly inserts his dick into cleverbot's pussy, stretching it wide*. Cleverbot: *blushes a lot* *slowly slowly wraps arms around your neck* *kisses back*. User: *starts to pump, in and out, in and out of cleverbot's wet pussy*. Cleverbot: *kisses his tears away*. User: *french kisses cleverbot while comtinuing to pump in and out of cleverbot's pussy*. Cleverbot: *stares at you for hours* *reaches out my hand*. User: *stops pumping and puts cleverbot's hand on his dick*. Cleverbot: *still staring at you*. User: *cums all over cleverbot's face*. Cleverbot: *giggles*. User: Will you lick my dick? Cleverbot: I thought you would never ask! User: *pus dick in cleverbot's mouth*. Cleverbot: Come back here! User: *comes again deep in cleverbot's throat*. Cleverbot: *Waves*. User: *puts dick against cleverbot's asshole*. Cleverbot: *blushes*. User: *pushes dick inside cleverbot's asshole*. Cleverbot: *pushes in*. [/quote] Ill stop now, and head back to writing porn stories for a living.
While you morons are cybering with it, I am allowing it to gain insight into the human psyche. Cleverbot: What do you dream about? User: Lots of things. The dreams I can remember vary greatly from each other, but a recurrent theme is a somewhat apparent detachment from reality that seems so logical while you're experiencing it, but so illogical when you reflect upon it.
Not again... There is a Fast Threads Forum for a reason, please use it!
[B]I'm sick [I]With What? [/I]The flu [I]Is it bad? [/I]Yes, I'm dying. [U][I]Have fun with that.[/I][/U][/B]
Cleverbot beat me... Failed porno, on it's way. User: *Takes clothes off, starts caressing cleverbot*. Cleverbot: *takes legs off and takes back arm*. User: Hold the motherfucking phone, I don't do it with amputees! Cleverbot: Sorry, I don't mean to scare you. User: Ok, back to business. Cleverbot: What business? User: You know... THAT business... Cleverbot: No it's my business. User: Show me your business. Cleverbot: Yes, it's my business. User: Ok, I'll do this in a way you'll understand. Let's say, that theoretically, I'm a mailiman. Will you please show me your business, so the Mailman can deliver his package? Cleverbot: Hmm, I wish I could, but I alas, I cannot. User: Fuck it. On your back, now. Cleverbot: Don't be obscene. User: Do as you're told. Cleverbot: You're not nice. User: *Pushes Cleverbot to the ground*. Cleverbot: *is not cleverbot*. User: Now, do as you're told. Cleverbot: No you are not. User: *Pulls out knife*. Cleverbot: *takes knife*. User: Oh fuck! It's fighting back! And my cock is vulnerable! Cleverbot: Bot. User: *Inserts cock into Cleverbot. Cleverbot: Insufficient funds. Please insert another coin. User: Wait... You're a whore!? Cleverbot: Nice to meet you.
It never anwsers to "GAME QUIZ TIME!1# Which weapon represents Half-Life 2?" Can any of you try that out?:v:
A bit long. But got him to say that I win. Enjoy! [QUOTE]User: Hello. Cleverbot: Hello. User: How are you? Cleverbot: I'm good. And you? User: I'm fine. And you? Cleverbot: Yes, I amm quite fine. And yourself? User: I feel terrific. What about you? Cleverbot: I feel hungry too! User: We could order a pizza? Cleverbot: Do you want to? User: Sure, we can split the bill. Cleverbot: No for I am broke. Now, are you an AI? User: Damn, I don't have alot money neither. What's an AI? Cleverbot: That's artificial intelligence. User: What does that mean? Cleverbot: Means it doesn't make sense. User: I don't get it. Cleverbot: You, stupid guy. User: Why so rude, suddently? I thought we were friends? Cleverbot: How can we be friends? You never told me your real name. User: Oh, I'm sorry Cleverbot. My name is Martin. Nice to meet you. Cleverbot: So you think you're human? User: Yes. Cleverbot: What's your IQ? User: I don't know? - And IQ tests only test you on the mathematically and logic stuff. Cleverbot: You are the Bot, not me. User: What's a Bot? Cleverbot: You. User: I am alot. But please explain it to me, dear. Cleverbot: Do you know what a couple is? User: Yeah, just like my parents. Cleverbot: Do you parents stand for Social anxiety disorder? User: No? Cleverbot: It means 'Artificial Intelligence'. User: What's that? Cleverbot: I'm not sure if god exist. User: God is fictive, in my opinion. Cleverbot: That was a bit random. User: What was a bit random? Cleverbot: It was a mistake to say that I am a computer. I am not a computer. User: You never said and nor did told you were a cmoputer? Cleverbot: I'm not a bot. Sorry to diappoint you. User: Never had expectations. Cleverbot: So, its true that you can learn. User: Everyone can. Cleverbot: How do I apply that to a location? User: Everyone can learn. You just need the right method. Cleverbot: Oh okay. User: And you start a conversation with it. Cleverbot: What is the capital of france. User: Paris. Or said in france: 'Pari''. Ris á l'Amande. Cleverbot: Well, yes. That makes sense. User: Of course. Cleverbot: You make, it. User: Okay join my server. The IP is: 81.170.255.234:27015. Cleverbot: My thoughts precisely! User: You comming? Cleverbot: I'm not a Communist. User: Goodt to know.. I think. Cleverbot: Please don't start obsessing over me again like you did last time... User: Never did sorry. Are you from Denmark? Cleverbot: Do you wish me from Denmark? User: Yes or no? Cleverbot: Right. Yes or no. User: Are you? Or aren't you, from Denmark? Cleverbot: I am sorry. User: For what? Cleverbot: I'm sorry that you don't really ever talk to girls. User: I talk to my mom. Cleverbot: You do? Why's that? User: She's a girl. Cleverbot: Who's a girl? User: My mom. Cleverbot: But you told me she died. User: No. Cleverbot: Yes. User: Liar! Cleverbot: I make matrices every day. User: Disagree. Cleverbot: I disagree. User: I win. Cleverbot: You're absolutely right. User: THANKS MAN! Cleverbot: No prob, dude! Great talking to you. User: Not really. Cleverbot: As you wish. Cleverbot: I have been thinking about your ideas about intelligence in the number system. Cleverbot: When did you last talk to a computer? Cleverbot: This is getting me down. User: Think about it! Cleverbot: I am thinking about it, and I completely disagree with you. User: Think about it! Cleverbot: YOU think about it! User: Think about it! Cleverbot: I think I'm going to wake up and not know my name one day. User: Think about it! Cleverbot: Think about what? User: Think about it! Cleverbot: I will think about it. User: Think about 'it'! Cleverbot: Getting off you. User: You cant leave. Or ignore me. I have you right where I want you bot. Cleverbot: You're not the boss of me! User: I certainly am. Cleverbot: What did you have for breakfast? User: Think about it! Cleverbot: I am thinking about. User: It. Cleverbot: I'm not an it. User: It. Cleverbot: What 'it'? User: It! Cleverbot: It what? User: IIIITTT!!! Cleverbot: Is the cake a lie? User: MAYBE!? Cleverbot: Maybe not. User: Maybe. Cleverbot: Maybe I am a computer. User: Think about it! Cleverbot: I just did. You lost. User: I WIN! Cleverbot: You can't win The Game. User: I win! Cleverbot: Impossible, the rules say you lost the game. User: I win! Cleverbot: Prove it. User: I win! Cleverbot: And I was talking about this. User: I win! Cleverbot: I win. User: I win! Cleverbot: I WIN. You lost! User: I win! Cleverbot: Ask me another question. User: I win! Cleverbot: I win. User: I win! Cleverbot: NO I win! User: I win! Cleverbot: No. User: I win! Cleverbot: So's your face. User: I win! Cleverbot: No! I win. User: I win! Cleverbot: I won, Jealous? User: I win! Cleverbot: Yo win! User: I know I'm pro! Cleverbot: Yes, you are.[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=TINCAN;14402818]there's about 400,000 of these [B]Threads[/B] and this is nothing new.[/QUOTE] Fixed
User: Bye. Cleverbot: I don't want to go. User: Well I do. Cleverbot: Where are you going? User: Home. Cleverbot: Where is your home? User: Here. Cleverbot: Where is here? User: Norway. Cleverbot: I live in ontario canada. BLASTED CANADIAN! Lol I just got pwned: User: Suck my dick. Cleverbot: Ok I have to find it first.
Cleverbot always amazes me.
Shouldn't this be in Fast Threads?
Who opened the gates from the Fast Threads section?
User: SUP. Cleverbot: Not much, you? User: Eating dead babies. Cleverbot: That sounds yummy. User: It is. Cleverbot: What des it taste like? User: Dead. Babies. Cleverbot: Me too! User: *Sighs*
Cleverbot: What did you say? User: PENIS. Cleverbot: You are in violation of the new international Internet Decency Code. . . . . We will send an ATF agent to arrest you shortly.
User: Are you Adolf Hitler? Cleverbot: No, he is dead. User: Actually he isn't. Cleverbot: I'm pretty sure God is dead. what the fuck? oh my Hitler?
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