Public drunkenness? More like public sadly hilarious drunk
15 replies, posted
It was another standard day at work for me, a 4pm-12am shift at a drug store. It was about 5:30 when I hear the loading dock buzzer go off, which meant the postman was there (there's a post office in the store). I call up the manager to open the back door (it has a security code), and I go off to do my work. I come back a bit later to check on things, and see the manager leaning out the loading dock door, and the postman standing there giggling. The manager (she) motions me over, I peer out, and see a guy bundled up on the staircase next to the door. The postman mentions that he must be drunk as all hell, since you could smell the booze off him.
Me and the manager exchange glances.
Me: "So.... you wanna tell him to go?"
Her: "Nah, you can."
Me: "Hey, buddy.... Hey.... HEY!"
Still, he sat there, curled up on the steps. At that point, I was mildly concerned that he was dead or something, since it was about -10 degrees (14 fahrenheit), and we didn't know how long he was there for. I exchange another glance with the manager, and prod him on the shoulder. Thankfully, he lifts his head up with a "whasa?"
Me: "You gotta move, buddy."
Him: *Mumbling*
Me: "You gotta go somewhere else"
Him: "Huh.. wh....*
And he passes out again. Great. So, the manager goes off to call the cops, and I stick around to make sure he doesn't mess something up. I hear rustling, and he pulls himself up, wobbles down the stairs, and starts to stumble his way away from the store. He turns around, and says "Uh... wh.... fuck," and stumbles off again. However, that's when he lost is balance, and falls over.
Whunk. Back of head and cement curb meet perfectly. And he's not moving anymore. I look up, and see another employee that was outside on a smoke break.
Him: "Uh... wow, may want to tell the manager to get an ambulance too."
I stand there a moment, take in the situation, and laugh. Yeah, I'm a dick. I head over and tell her to summon the paramedics. So, eventually, the ambulance and police arrive, pick him up, and question us briefly about what happened. As the paramedic was leaving, he said "Remember to clean up that blood." We all direct our gazes to the curb, and see a rather large splotch of blood on the cement and snow. From there, it took 3 buckets full of water and bleach to wash away the stain.
Best day of work ever.
I hope he's going to be okay. :ohdear:
When the paramedics got him up, he was somewhat conscious, so I can only assume he'll live.
Drunk people are an excellent source of amusement.
You must of looked mighty good getting him help and cleaning up after him.
If you play your cards right you might get to fuck the manager.
[QUOTE=Dan2593;19893548]You must of looked mighty good getting him help and cleaning up after him.
If you play your cards right you might get to fuck the manager.[/QUOTE]
Let me paint you the picture of my manager. Late 40's, and not carrying it well at all. Complete bitch. Incomprehensible accent. I don't think the drunk guy would even do her.
[QUOTE=Clover;19893563]Let me paint you the picture of my manager. Late 40's, and not carrying it well at all. Complete bitch. Incomprehensible accent. I don't think the drunk guy would even do her.[/QUOTE]
Pussy is pussy, it doesn't have to talk.
You're a dick for laughing.
[QUOTE=Dan2593;19893573]Pussy is pussy, it doesn't have to talk.[/QUOTE]
By that logic you would happily have sex with the rotting corpse of a goat.
[QUOTE=Dan2593;19893573]Pussy is pussy, it doesn't have to talk.[/QUOTE]
This man is wise beyond all comprehension.
Silly drunks these days
Makes me wonder what I've been doing all the times I've been drunk.
Sucks cause I can't remember shit. :argh:
Why was this the "best day at work"? Why is it funny? Just sounds sad, and I find it disgusting that you wouldn't get the first aid kit while waiting for the ambulance.
What was the blood from? How did he injure himself?
[B]EDIT:[/B] I'm dumb
That poor man. I sure hope he'll be okay.
Also, you're a dick.
[QUOTE=Master117;19895877]What was the blood from? How did he injure himself?[/QUOTE]
Nice reading. Might wanna consider reading glasses.
Also, what do you work as?
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