How i went from the happiest guy on earth to a waster with a criminal record. - General

Well I just seen that thread on the two people who committed suicide and how you should not bottle your feelings up and tell people, well ive been here since late 2005 and i see you guys as brothers to me in a way, and ive been having suicidal thoughts lately so i thought i will let out my feelings to you. Before i start, this might be quite a long read, just warning you. Well it all started in 2010, i had nobody, i wasn't in education and i didn't have a job. I pretty much spent my whole time on the internet or getting drunk at parties. One day i decided to go on chatroullete.com, you know that place where its mostly mens dicks? yeah that place. well I was on it for a while when i came across these two girls. we got talking and i realised one of these girls, lets call her amy, was really really nice. We exchanged msn addresses and the next day when she got home from the sleepover she came online. We started talking about some random crap i dont remember. this carried on for a few weeks and i realised that im becoming quite attached to this girl. whenever she would come online ide be instantly happy. we started speaking on skype and she told me where she lives, its around 100 miles from my house. I live in birmingham (united kingdom). i thought nothing of this and we carried on talking like normal for a further few weeks. until i started really falling for this girl, i told myself not to as she lives so far away from me, but i couldnt help it i had to tell her how i felt, i couldnt hold it in anymore. so when she came online i told her. "amy, i know its stupid but im falling for you, your amazing, your beautiful, your kind, you make me happy just by smiling. please dont let this ruin our friendship." to my suprise she said that she felt the same way back with a gleaming smile on her face. after this we started to become ever closer. we would text eachother daily, phone eachother in the night etc. she told me that im not worthless and i deserve an education. just to make her proud of me i tried to get back into a college course and was successful, i told her that im starting a course in IT and she told me she was so proud of me, it made me feel amazing inside. a few weeks after that i told her that i really wanted to meet her, she said that she could come down this weekend as her parents were going shopping in birmingham.I was so overjoyed it was unreal. that week went so slow but finally it was the weekend. I was so nervouse when i heard the doorbell ring. but when i went downstairs to greet her my nerves all went away. the most beautiful girl i have ever seen stepped through my door. i can remember it like yesterday. she was wearing a superman hoody with a skirt and tights on. i smiled at her and said hey, she done her amazing smile back and said hey Jack. we went into my living room as our parents discussed where to go shopping and talked just as comfortable as we did on msn and skype. it was amazing. as the day went on i took her out and we had an amazing walk through these fields. she held my hand and smiled at me, and i kissed her. i couldnt control myself.. she held my shoulders and kissed me back. it felt like something out of a film. the sun setting behind us. then she had to leave and i was devistated. she was crying telling me she didnt want to leave. I promised her i would get a job and il see her every weekend. i kissed her again and told her to stay strong for me. she nodded and i wiped the tears away from her eyes. fast forward a few weeks later, i applied for a job at UPS and was thrilled when they said i got it. i told amy and she told me she was so proud of me again with a huge smile on her face. i told her i would come down the weekend after i got payed. after i got payed i booked my train ticket up and some other stuff, a huge as stereo system, a samsung galaxy S and a ps3 (im only human afterall) and i got on the train to london, on my own. needless to say i was shitting it as it was only the 2nd time ide been on a train. but she helped me through the underground and met me at the train station when i got there. she greeted me with a kiss and introduced me to her parents. her dad was awesome, we played the playstation together and had an awesome laugh. but i could tell her mum didnt like me, im from a rough part of the UK and where amy lives is very very rich. i acted on my best behaviour, manors and all that shit but i could just tell she thought i was scum. we went out to the grounds of this castle and on top of this hill amy promised me she is never going to leave me, she told me she loved me and wanted to be together forever. i was so happy to hear this and said it back through the happy tears in my eyes. we sat ontop of that hill all day, cuddled up, kissing and talking. it was the best day of my life. it carried on like this, me going up on the train and spending the day together until eventually i was aloud to sleep round her house. we was just like a normal couple. i was someone else when i was with her, ide change, ide become happy. im not sure if anybody really knows me here but i suffer from anger problems, ide get violent at the simplest of things. but when i was with her it would just disappear. she was my life, my whole world revolved around this girl. ide do overtime just to meet her more. ive never felt this wat about a girl in my whole entire live. i loved her. while all this was happening though her mum was trying to convince amy im a horrible person. she thinks i would hurt her because im from a rough area, i promised amy that i would never hurt her and she knows i wouldnt. i phoned her mum up and asked what the hell she is playing at, she told me that she [B]knows[/B] im going to hurt her daughter. yeah she was an ignorant fuck.. this is where it started to go down hill.. her mum had told amys friends that im a horrible person and im going to hurt her daughter. so at this point amy had her mum and her friends begging her to leave me. she took none of it and phoned me up crying, telling me she will carry on fighting because she loves me. this went on until i eventually lost my temper with her mum. i called her a heartless cunt and she should just let her daughter be happy. she used this as wood to fuel the fire. she told her husband (who i was quite close to, played gt5 online with him and could talk to him easily) and he phoned me up. he told me never to contact amy again because im a monster. did he know what he was asking me to do? he was asking the impossible. amy was my life and she loved me just as much as i loved her. amy stood up to her parents and said "just leave Jack alone, i love him." and they kicked her out of the house for the night. yeah, they hated me THAT much that they kicked their own daughter out of the house because she wanted to be with me. her parents took her phone, computer and blocked me off everything. i couldnt talk to amy at all. i phoned them up and they said she can do so much better. and told me to get the fuck out of their lives, oh and her dad said he is coming to my house to "rip my fucking head off" i told my friends about this and bieng the violent bunch of people they are decided to to up to their house and kick the shit out of him. i told him about this and said im going to stop it dont worry. he said fuck you and phoned the police. the police came and said that i am held responsible for getting the people together and an "attempted attack on someone" apparently. so at this point amy things im a monster for doing this. im in trouble with the police and my friends are going to kick the shit out of this poor guy regardless. i eventually got them to snap out of it and said just leave it, but now ive lost the person i love and if i step foot in her town her friends will kick the shit out of me.. she told me she still loves me. but you have no idea what it feels like to still be in love with eachother but her parents, her friends, and the police stopping you from seeing eachother. ive tried everything Facepunch. nothing is working. ive tried to move on, i cant.. so ive resorted to smoking weed and drinking. and ive been having major suicidal thoughts, which is the reason for this thread. im sorry if it was boring to read and half of it probably didnt make sense. its hard to type with tears in your eyes. on top of it all, im stuck in a job where i dont want to be but have to to pay my phone contract. If you have been through this yourself then please contact me, i would do anything to get rid of this pain. i dont know how to fall out of love with her when i know she still loves me back.. s pro-tip: dont fall in love facepunch, it hurts way too much. also inb4 kill youself.

[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=am_-Vn-x_NY[/media] [highlight](User was banned for this post ("Snipe" - Swebonny))[/highlight]

Brilliant first post, thanks.

Jesus christ, capitalization and paragraphs might be nice. How do you expect anyone to read that?

See that thing next to the "#" and "]" keys, just on the right of them, press it once in a while, my eyes are now bleeding, thanks.

I tried my best.

to be honest you are probably a completely deluded psycho who thinks this girl still loves you when shes moved on. You sound extremely dependent on her and should definitely seek help for depression or anxiety.

And your best was terrible, learn how to write.

You can't expect anyone to take you seriously typing like that. You've been here for 4 years and you don't know how it works?

-Snip-

[QUOTE=sphinxa279;27539935]See that thing next to the "#" and "]" keys, just on the right of them, press it once in a while, my eyes are now bleeding, thanks.[/QUOTE] enter is next to ' but whatever

I really dont see the problem with it? i put paragraphs in. [editline]20th January 2011[/editline] [QUOTE=reltih floda;27539943]to be honest you are probably a completely deluded psycho who thinks this girl still loves you when shes moved on. You sound extremely dependent on her and should definitely seek help for depression or anxiety.[/QUOTE] I am a really shit writer, as you can tell. but she did love me back and she did beg for me to not give up on her.

How old was this girl?

[QUOTE=not_Morph53;27539971]How old was this girl?[/QUOTE] same age as me, 17

At this point, the first thing you should do is to stop having suicidal thoughts.

Man that's really fucked up.

yeah man stuff changes, especially when your friends are willing to assault someone for you. Drop it, hoes ain't shit and while your there get some perspective and citalopram.

That's just sad OP. Give life another shot, even though Amy may feel like the only girl in the world but she's not. There are >6 billion people on this planet ; you'll find the one eventually. And if you lifted yourself from a miserable life before, I'm sure you can do it again. Please don't commit suicide. :( There's way more to life than you know. You have the potential to help many underprivileged people. Why throw it away. There is an infinite number of opportunities waiting for you, sights you never seen, things you've never done, people you never met, experiences you never enjoyed. Don't lose the chance. :(

How many months have you known each other? Sorry if I missed it in that mashup of an emotional rollercoaster. Really OP, if she's got ridiculously overbearing parents (though I'd probably hate you too if you called me or my partner a heartless cunt), she'd be a whiny bitch most of the time anyway. You'll find someone easier to have a relationship with eventually.

[QUOTE=Doomish;27539952]enter is next to ' but whatever[/QUOTE] It's called living in the UK or having a different keyboard, but whatever.

[QUOTE=Mlisen14;27539991]How long have you known each other? Sorry if I missed it in that mashup of an emotional rollercoaster.[/QUOTE] met at the start of 2010 [editline]20th January 2011[/editline] [QUOTE=thereisno131;27539988]That's just sad OP. Give life another shot, even though Amy may feel like the only girl in the world but she's not. There are >6 billion people on this planet ; you'll find the one eventually. And if you lifted yourself from a miserable life before, I'm sure you can do it again.[/QUOTE] Thanks for that, first decent post. i guess it just takes time.

A really good read, Something similar happened to me, I don't think you should let anything get in the way if you love someone. I think you should apologise to the parents and even sink low to beg them.

[QUOTE=Fycix;27539947]You can't expect anyone to take you seriously typing like that. You've been here for 4 years and you don't know how it works?[/QUOTE] [QUOTE=Darkebrz;27539945]And your best was terrible, learn how to write.[/QUOTE] just read the post you nitpicky bitches. i went through it fine.

How come the Dad hasn't been charged with assault? Threatening to "rip someone's head off" isn't legal I thought? Or does it not count if it's over the phone? The cops sound like retards too, you should be able to fight that and win easily even pro bono.

Tragic, bless ur soul.

i read it its pretty stupid how you called the mom a "selfless cunt" but thats just me, but other than that, you deserved that girl, and i hope things work out, even though her parents hate you

Eh, Me and my girl never have these kind of troubles. Maybe you should look for someone a bit more... convenient?

I saw you in a FP Meet video... you don't look like scum at all...

Or you can beg them. Actually try that.

[QUOTE=connor38;27540013]A really good read, Something similar happened to me, I don't think you should let anything get in the way if you love someone. I think you should apologise to the parents and even sink low to beg them.[/QUOTE] Thanks. oh i have, ive tried opologising for everything and pleading to just be friends with amy. they just dont want to know though. its hard enough losing someone you love but losing all contact what so ever is just ridiculous.