"Brush your god damn teeth" and 11 other silly 911 Calls
39 replies, posted
[QUOTE]Brushing your teeth may be important, but police in Chatham, Ont., would like to remind the public that it’s not crucial enough to merit a call to 911. A family dispute about dental hygiene topped the Southwestern Ontario force’s annual list of the dozen most ridiculous emergency calls received during the past year.
Not all inappropriate emergency calls are created equal, though. Police also handed out top honours for the cutest call of the year. The award went to a three-year-old, who called 911 while watching the movie Cars. The child feared for the safety of the character Lightning McQueen during a high-octane chase with rival Chick Hicks, police said.
Here are the top silly calls received by the Chatham-Kent Police Service:
12. A man attended the Wallaceburg police station inquiring if anyone had turned in his lost dentures. He still had his top teeth, but he was looking for his bottoms.
11. A man called police to report that his unlocked vehicle had been entered. Stolen was a winning doughnut and coffee tab from Tim Hortons.
10. A man called police to report that two girls damaged his car. However, the evidence indicated that the white substance on the car had been left by birds, not girls.
9. A man called police claiming he had just been struck by a vehicle. The man even provided a full description of the suspect vehicle. Through investigation, the man finally admitted that due to his intoxication, he tripped over a
trailer hitch in the driveway.
8. A man called 911 to report that there was a squirrel on his front porch acting in a suspicious manner.
7. A man called 911 to report that there was a large snapping turtle on the sidewalk that appeared to be getting ready to jump into traffic.
6. A woman called police to report that she has just been threatened by her downstairs neighbour. Apparently, as the woman watered her plants, some water dripped down onto her neighbour’s dog.
5. A 13-year-old youth called police to report that her mother would not allow her to do her own laundry.
4. A man called police in January to complain about the weather report he just heard on a local radio station. They reported “slight flurries” when, in fact, he was driving in a “snowstorm.”
3. A woman called police to report that her drug dealer was lacing her crack with drugs that caused her to hallucinate and hear voices. She asked police to make him stop doing that.
2. A woman called police to report that she was just attacked by a duck that was now sitting in a puddle watching her. The woman was not injured and officers failed to locate the duck upon their arrival.
1. Police were called to a family dispute between a father and his adult son. The son called police because his father told him to brush his teeth and he didn’t want to. Police were able to defuse the situation by talking the 20-year-old son into brushing his teeth right away, thus making his 63-year-old father happy.[/QUOTE]
[url]http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/national/family-toothbrushing-dispute-tops-ontario-towns-list-of-silliest-911-calls/article6739674/[/url]
Oh god why are people so silly.
[quote]A woman called police to report that her drug dealer was lacing her crack with drugs that caused her to hallucinate and hear voices. She asked police to make him stop doing that.[/quote]
When I read that, I really do wonder how people even think that was a good idea.
How is number 12 a call? From what I can read, its saying the guy went to the police station in person.
I wish number 11 was phrased differently. At first it looked like random nonsense to me. A better way to word it would have been "A man called police to report that a winning doughnut and coffee tab from Tim Horton's was stolen from his unlocked vehicle"
[QUOTE=Jetblack357;39025699]When I read that, I really do wonder how people even think that was a good idea.[/QUOTE]
funny as fuck tho
[QUOTE=Jetblack357;39025699]When I read that, I really do wonder how people even think that was a good idea.[/QUOTE]
She was probably Schizophrenic.
[QUOTE=Jetblack357;39025699]When I read that, I really do wonder how people even think that was a good idea.[/QUOTE]
She was taking crack, good decision making skills probably weren't her forte
[QUOTE]1. Police were called to a family dispute between a father and his adult son. The son called police because his father told him to brush his teeth and he didn’t want to. Police were able to defuse the situation by talking the [B]20-year-old[/B] son into brushing his teeth right away, thus making his 63-year-old father happy.[/QUOTE]
Oh god, that caught me off guard.
[QUOTE=Buck.;39025882]Oh god, that caught me off guard.[/QUOTE]
[quote]8. A man called 911 to report that there was a squirrel on his front porch acting in a suspicious manner.[/quote]
it was this one that got me. :v:
[quote] A woman called police to report that she was just attacked by a duck that was now sitting in a puddle watching her[/quote]
[B]"That's right, stay there you punk ass bitch."[/B]
[IMG]http://fohn.net/duck-pictures-facts/mallard-duck.jpg[/IMG]
Number 7 makes sense, if I saw a LARGE snapping turtle that looked like it was about to crawl into traffic, I wouldn't dare touch it. Them things are fucking vicious.
[QUOTE=Rob Markia;39026118]Number 7 makes sense, if I saw a LARGE snapping turtle that looked like it was about to crawl into traffic, I wouldn't dare touch it. Them things are fucking vicious.[/QUOTE]
[img]http://www.smtexas.net/faculty/jackson/CAPPS6FT3/hall/webpage/images/white%20dots%20snapper.jpg[/img]
No they're not.
[QUOTE=Jetblack357;39026743][img]http://www.smtexas.net/faculty/jackson/CAPPS6FT3/hall/webpage/images/white%20dots%20snapper.jpg[/img]
No they're not.[/QUOTE]
[img]http://i.imgur.com/Ye0Ut.jpg[/img]
yes they are
[editline]30th December 2012[/editline]
a snapping turtle in the road is legitimately cause for alarm, hitting one will both kill or severely injure the turtle and damage the car, and swerving to avoid it is very likely to cause a head-on collision.
[QUOTE=Jetblack357;39026743][img]http://www.smtexas.net/faculty/jackson/CAPPS6FT3/hall/webpage/images/white%20dots%20snapper.jpg[/img]
No they're not.[/QUOTE]
Umm
[url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7IJBPXuDezk[/url]
[QUOTE=Kasuga Ayumu;39026808][img]http://i.imgur.com/Ye0Ut.jpg[/img]
yes they are
[editline]30th December 2012[/editline]
a snapping turtle in the road is legitimately cause for alarm, hitting one will both kill or severely injure the turtle and damage the car, and swerving to avoid it is very likely to cause a head-on collision.[/QUOTE]
I see nothing but a friendly animal in that image, you are a liar.
[editline]30th December 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=McGii;39026938]Umm
[url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7IJBPXuDezk[/url][/QUOTE]
I cringed so fucking hard.
[QUOTE]11. A man called police to report that his unlocked vehicle had been entered. Stolen was a winning doughnut and coffee tab from Tim Hortons.[/QUOTE]
But I thought that especially the police would understand me.. :(
[QUOTE=BlkDucky;39025943][quote]8. A man called 911 to report that there was a squirrel on his front porch acting in a suspicious manner.[/quote]
it was this one that got me. :v:[/QUOTE]
Those pesky squirrels and their tagging and rap music
T'neighbourhood ain't safe no more
[QUOTE=Jetblack357;39026743][img]http://www.smtexas.net/faculty/jackson/CAPPS6FT3/hall/webpage/images/white%20dots%20snapper.jpg[/img]
No they're not.[/QUOTE]
they've found Alligator Snappers with [I]motherfucking musket-balls[/I] lodged in them from the civil war. that means that a confederate soldier who has faced down death itself was scared enough of a snapper to shoot it with a goddamn musket.
[QUOTE=Roger Waters;39030044]they've found Alligator Snappers with [I]motherfucking musket-balls[/I] lodged in them from the civil war. that means that a confederate soldier who has faced down death itself was scared enough of a snapper to shoot it with a goddamn musket.[/QUOTE]
It's more likely he wanted to eat it
[QUOTE=jaredop;39031052]It's more likely he wanted to eat it[/QUOTE]
snapping turtle is gross I'd rather just eat grass
[QUOTE=brianosaur;39033180]
[/QUOTE]
That is fucking amazing, thank you.
[QUOTE]8. A man called 911 to report that there was a squirrel on his front porch acting in a suspicious manner.[/QUOTE]
[IMG]http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mb4759UZo31rdxaqio1_500.gif[/IMG]
[QUOTE]1. Police were called to a family dispute between a father and his adult son. The son called police because his father told him to brush his teeth and he didn't want to. Police were able to defuse the situation by talking the 20-year-old son into brushing his teeth right away, thus making his 63-year-old father happy.[/QUOTE]
I did not know police respond to domestic calls like this.
i wonder if anyone ever called in on September 11th to say "happy birthday"
or November 9th if that's the way Canada rolls
[QUOTE=lavacano;39034053]i wonder if anyone ever called in on September 11th to say "happy birthday"
or November 9th if that's the way Canada rolls[/QUOTE]
why would you say happy birthday on sept. 11?
[QUOTE=Kasuga Ayumu;39034720]why would you say happy birthday on sept. 11?[/QUOTE]
look at the numbers
If you dont know how to handle a snapper it is best to not mess with it, but calling the cops seems extreme. They are not evil or anything and they are often not even that aggressive. My snappers are chill and I have helped quite a few others across the road around my house without any problem.
[QUOTE=Kasuga Ayumu;39033046]snapping turtle is gross I'd rather just eat grass[/QUOTE]
Actually if prepared correctly they make good soup.
[QUOTE=imptastick;39034749]If you dont know how to handle a snapper it is best to not mess with it, but calling the cops seems extreme.[/QUOTE]
big ass fucking animal in the middle of the road (assuming it's a big snapper)
call for help
if he didn't know the local animal control number then that call actually makes a fair bit of sense in my opinion
[QUOTE=Kasuga Ayumu;39026808][img]http://i.imgur.com/Ye0Ut.jpg[/img]
yes they are
[editline]30th December 2012[/editline]
a snapping turtle in the road is legitimately cause for alarm, hitting one will both kill or severely injure the turtle and damage the car, and swerving to avoid it is very likely to cause a head-on collision.[/QUOTE]
Not sure what to rate, I agree that is is best to move them, but not that they are vicious. They have a strong bite force and can move fast but they only act in self defense, they are more likely to try and escape than go after you.
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