The Best Damn Pot Pies Ever - General

You know those microwavable pot pie things that are pretty damn good, salty as hell and generally bad ass? Okay, so I'm going to blow your dick off because this pot pie enhancement product will increase size, desire, and energy of your pot pie You need: A pot pie (duh) A carrot A celery stalk A potato (or if you're using the tiny red ones, two or three) Corn Peas Butter Malk Slice of bread Chicken base Flour (not pictured Garlic (I used pre-minced garlic because lazy and drunk) Salt, pepper, whatever other seasonings you want, I'm staying simple though [img]http://filesmelt.com/dl/niggerpastry.jpg[/img] So, first you're going to scrub your potato (if keeping the skin on, if taking it off just peel it) and put it into a pot of boiling water. It's done once you stick a fork in it and it won't stick to the fork. No pics because this should be obvious. Secondly you take your carrot, peel and wash it and put it into a bowl (used a salad dressing thing because no bowls), then wash and chop your celery and do the same. Add enough water to cover and microwave it for 2-3 minutes, depending on how hot yours gets. Easymode cooked vegetables, it works for everything, try it next time you do anything. [img]http://filesmelt.com/dl/2659.jpg[/img] Get another pan, turn it on medium-low and add about 2 tablespoons of butter and some chicken base. I've just kinda got the amount down, but it's a bit less than the butter. Remember that this shit is salty and sorta strong, so don't put in a whole lot. [img]http://filesmelt.com/dl/3477.jpg[/img] Once that's melted and mixed, add some flour, 1-3 tablespoons should work, just enough to where it looks like applesauce baby puke. [img]http://filesmelt.com/dl/4349.jpg[/img] Yeah, like that, it should look weird and unappetizing. Once it starts to get browner, add enough milk to cover, then a little more. Not a whole lot, or it's going to suck hard. Just stir it and let it get thick, it's going to go slow for a while, but in about 5-10 minutes it's going to get thick as hell quick. [img]http://filesmelt.com/dl/5262.jpg[/img] Get your toaster and toast some toast. This is great to get rid of your bread heels. I burned mine good, but when it's done just cut it up and set it to the side. Whenever your vegetables are done, add your corn and peas, cover it, and let it sit in the microwave turned off, they don't need to cook, just be warmed. No pics, pretty easy. When your potato is done, drain the water. If it's still got it's skin, cut it up and remove and dark or black parts of it. Then, put back into the pot, add enough milk to cover the bottom, about a tablespoon of butter, a tiny bit of whatever you like in your potatoes (I like garlic and chives, but no chives so just garlic this time. Be sparing, seriously), and mash it like your fucking enemies. [img]http://filesmelt.com/dl/7142.jpg[/img] Once their how you like them (creamy, chunky, etc. If you want to go super smooth, use and electric mixer, but for this small of an amount it's kinda retarded), clean off your masher and get ready to assemble your foods. Of course, you have to drain your vegetables first. [img]http://filesmelt.com/dl/8112.jpg[/img] [b]JUSTICE LEAGUE[/B] [img]http://filesmelt.com/dl/9130.jpg[/img] [b]ASSEMBLE![/B] [img]http://filesmelt.com/dl/10136.jpg[/img] So yeah, it's fucking delicious and you all should try it. I also have pictures of me geeking out to Mean Girls while eating this, if you want to see them.

Can you get pot pies in the UK?

Dunno, I'm in 'murrica. Look around your grocery store.

Oh I know what they are now. I might try this with a Pukka Pie.

Their great dude, it just looks like gross slop.

How can you eat that bro? Premade pot pies are hella bad for you. Also, instead of buying pre-minced garlic, just buy fresh garlic cloves and use a little hand mincer to mince it yourself. It'd taste 100x better and it's really no hassle. Also, microwaving vegetables is bad cause it destroys most of the vitamins and nutrients.

I know they are, but I don't care. I usually would mince my own, but read above. I know it is, but I don't care, it's quicker and easier. If I cared about nutrients I wouldn't be making this in the first place.

Those sound tasty, when I saw this thread I thought you meant weed pies.

Fair enough, hope you enjoyed it :)

[QUOTE=loopoo;36691961]How can you eat that bro? Premade pot pies are hella bad for you. Also, instead of buying pre-minced garlic, just buy fresh garlic cloves and use a little hand mincer to mince it yourself. It'd taste 100x better and it's really no hassle. Also, microwaving vegetables is bad cause it destroys most of the vitamins and nutrients.[/QUOTE] wrong, steaming vegetables destroys vitamins and nutrients, not microwaves

[QUOTE=loopoo;36692123]Fair enough, hope you enjoyed it :)[/QUOTE] I did. Sorry if that sounded dick above, I didn't mean it that way.

I was tucking into a pie earlier today and after finishing it realised that I bought it to do this :(

Best damn pie ever? Get out of here. Best damn pies are curry pies, I tell ya.

[QUOTE=Antdawg;36710989]Best damn pie ever? Get out of here. Best damn pies are curry pies, I tell ya.[/QUOTE] Steak and ale.

[QUOTE=Antdawg;36710989]Best damn pie ever? Get out of here. Best damn pies are curry pies, I tell ya.[/QUOTE] I really don't like curry, imo the most overrated thing ever, next to Tiramisu.

[QUOTE=djshox;36697571]wrong, steaming vegetables destroys vitamins and nutrients, not microwaves[/QUOTE] Wrong. Steaming vegetables is the safest way of cooking vegetables as that method [B]retains[/B] most of the vitamins and minerals. Boiling vegetables gets rid of all the good stuff. Boiling your vegetables is a big no-no! Microwaving [I]anything[/I] gets rid of a huge chunk of it's nutritional goodness value. The intense friction caused by the microwave destroys most of the vitamins and minerals, so all you're left with is a food with calories and not much good nutrition-wise. Sorry to burst your bubble bro :(

[QUOTE=loopoo;36814308]Microwaving [I]anything[/I] gets rid of a huge chunk of it's nutritional goodness value. The intense friction caused by the microwave destroys most of the vitamins and minerals, so all you're left with is a food with calories and not much good nutrition-wise.[/QUOTE] this is wrong

[QUOTE=loopoo;36814308]Wrong. Steaming vegetables is the safest way of cooking vegetables as that method [B]retains[/B] most of the vitamins and minerals. Boiling vegetables gets rid of all the good stuff. Boiling your vegetables is a big no-no! Microwaving [I]anything[/I] gets rid of a huge chunk of it's nutritional goodness value. The intense friction caused by the microwave destroys most of the vitamins and minerals, so all you're left with is a food with calories and not much good nutrition-wise. Sorry to burst your bubble bro :([/QUOTE] i have seen the light however the microwave isn't the reason for the loss of nutrients, it has to do with water for any way you choose to cook your vegetables: [URL]http://www.lifeslittlemysteries.com/690-does-microwaving-vegetables-destroy-their-nutrients.html[/URL] [URL]http://www.health.harvard.edu/fhg/updates/Microwave-cooking-and-nutrition.shtml[/URL] [URL]http://www.nytimes.com/2006/10/17/health/17real.html[/URL]

[QUOTE=mike;36815564]this is wrong[/QUOTE] Oops, my bad. I meant to just say it destroys vitamins, not minerals. The high heat from the friction causes the vitamin molecules to break apart. However, upon further research, the amount of vitamins lost is negligible.