[url]http://gawker.com/5839596/gordon-ramsays-porn-dwarf-double-eaten-by-badger[/url]
[quote]U.K. tabloid Sunday Sport recently introduced the world to Percy Foster, a 35-year-old dwarf porn star whose career was just beginning to catch fire. It was all because an observant production assistant on the set of Hi-Ho Hi-Ho, It's Up Your Arse We Go had noticed how much Foster looked like celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay. But just as Foster was set to join the rarefied ranks of celebrity lookalike dwarf porn stars, tragedy struck: The body of the 3' 6" performer has been discovered in a badger's den, partially eaten.
According to Sunday Sport's follow-up account, Foster was found "deep in an underground chamber by Ministry of Agriculture experts ahead of a planned badger-gassing programme near Tregaron, west Wales." They write that "expert CSI teams had to use fingertip technology to remove his body from the six-foot-deep burrow." (I have no idea what fingertip technology is, but I imagine it's akin to one of those claw cranes you find in arcades and drugstores.)
Officials have not yet ruled out suicide, and adult film producer Dexter Yamunkeh's comments — in which he intimates that Foster may have cracked under the pressures of being the world's leading Gordon Ramsay-lookalike-sex-dwarf — certainly don't invalidate the possibility:
"Percy was a little guy with big problems. He was doing well but he was under pressure, 24/7, like everyone in this goddamned business."
It's more than a little curious that the internet, aka God's porn dumping grounds, contains not a single reference to either Percy or Dexter prior to these two news items. But that's just the cynic in me talking. So tonight, we pour out a little (and I do mean little) gin in memory of poor Percy. We may never get to see his work in Midget MasterChef: Assbasters 7, but his memory will live on all the same.[/quote]
...
What?
this is a tabloid
why is it here
I totally trust something with a header like this:
[img]http://fastcache.gawkerassets.com/assets/images/7/2011/09/gordondwarf1.jpg[/img]
this looks like a reliable source
[img]http://curiouslypersistent.files.wordpress.com/2008/03/sunday-sport.gif[/img]
Why does it feel like I'm reading an article from The Onion here
:wtc:
what am i reading
You donkey
late
Must have been a short meal.
I love the name of the movie: "Hi-Ho,Hi-Ho,It's Up Your Arse We Go"
That's really disturbing actually.
rip gordon ramsay sex midget 9/13 never forget
Aw man I wish I had a porn dwarf
The only reason they're so small is because they're under so much pressure. Diamonds in the rough, midget porn stars.
RIP.
[QUOTE=killkill85;32269307]I love the name of the movie: "Hi-Ho,Hi-Ho,It's Up Your Arse We Go"[/QUOTE]
I was trying not to laugh out of respect for the dead guy, but I couldn't hold it in when I read that.
This is old, because I remember posting this in LMAO Pics:
[img]http://a4.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/306113_248942561803598_112606095437246_848980_5648416_n.jpg[/img]
[editline]13th September 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=Chrille;32268591]this looks like a reliable source
[img]http://curiouslypersistent.files.wordpress.com/2008/03/sunday-sport.gif[/img][/QUOTE]
This is how it is now, look they even included a photo banned by the White House of Bin Laden reading their newspaper on the toilet
[img]http://i51.tinypic.com/vqqsl1.jpg[/img]
[quote]Hi-Ho Hi-Ho, It's Up Your Arse We Go[/quote]
I fucking lost it.
[QUOTE=Zeke129;32270664][img]http://i.imgur.com/79iEp.png[/img]
[/QUOTE]
Interesting, because I found a kebab shop there.
[IMG]http://dl.dropbox.com/u/1467131/Spitsbergen.jpg[/IMG]
[QUOTE=Zeke129;32270664][img]http://i.imgur.com/79iEp.png[/img]
[img]http://i.imgur.com/cwUJt.png[/img]
[img]http://i.imgur.com/1pxdj.png[/img]
[img]http://i.imgur.com/gTy3O.png[/img][/QUOTE]
I'm not sure I understand. Are you suggesting that the newspaper's story is untrustworthy, and that it might simply create intentionally absurd headlines and stories for the sake of entertainment? If so, are you implying that Gordon Ramsay's Porn-Dwarf might [i]actually still be alive[/i]? If that's true, then can we really trust [i]any[/i] of those other stories? What [b]actually[/b] happened to 2-Headed Santa's reindeer? Was the donkey just a fall-guy for the real criminal?
You raise a concerning point, Zeke.
[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;32270835]I'm not sure I understand. Are you suggesting that the newspaper's story is untrustworthy, and that it might simply create intentionally absurd headlines and stories for the sake of entertainment? If so, are you implying that Gordon Ramsay's Porn-Dwarf might [i]actually still be alive[/i]? If that's true, then can we really trust [i]any[/i] of those other stories? What [b]actually[/b] happened to 2-Headed Santa's reindeer? Was the donkey just a fall-guy for the real criminal?
You raise a concerning point, Zeke.[/QUOTE]
The whole thing is a conspiracy by Gawker and Sunday Sport to somehow get a hold of the new prototype iPhone 5
(yeah I have no fucking idea either)
What the flying fuck?
Thread title reminded me of Dwarf Fortress...
Wat.
LOL I'm watching Kitchen Nightmares too.
Just reading the title was surreal anough.
Took a picture of this headline on my phone about a week ago.
A damn shame...
That's no way for a man to die.
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