No more dumb old dad: Changing the bumbling father stereotype - Polidicks

[quote](CNN) -- There's a movement under way among dads in America that's changing what you see on TV. Across the country, more and more are fed up -- and rising up against the stereotype of the inept, clueless father. "We're not the Peter Griffin or the Homer Simpson that we're often portrayed as," said Kevin Metzger, who runs the Dadvocate blog. It's often the chief gripe among the dads I interview about modern fatherhood. David Holland, father of three, rails against "doofus dads" in ads. In his blog Blather. Wince. Repeat., he calls them "Madison Avenue's go-to guy." During every commercial break, he says, he and his wife "try to see who can be the first one to spot the idiot husband or father." In a sign of their growing power, dads out to end the stereotype recently scored a knockout blow against a pair of TV ads. A Huggies ad earlier this year said the company put its diapers "to the toughest test imaginable: dads, alone with their babies, in one house, for five days." What exactly made time with dad "the toughest test imaginable?" The ad showed dads making some unpleasant faces and ended with a woman saying, "good luck, babe." Another Huggies ad featured a group of dads not changing their babies' diapers while watching an entire game through "double overtime." Angry dads and moms responded with complaints, saying fathers aren't incompetent parents who leave their kids in dirty diapers. Chris Routly took it a step further, creating a petition on change.org. "This wasn't just that they had created a bumbling dad character or that sort of thing or just excluding dad," like so many other TV portrayals, he said. "They were using language that was really saying dads are terrible at this stuff." Huggies took action. On Facebook, the company praised dads and said its intention was to "break out of stereotypes." And Huggies officials called Routly, giving him a list of steps they were taking to show fathers in a better light. Soon, Huggies issued new ads featuring dads caring for their toddlers. Last month, the NYC Dads Group heaped praise on them for "raising the bar" in how a father was portrayed. Huggies isn't the first to run into frustration from consumers rejecting what they view as an outdated, inaccurate trope. AT&T angered some with an ad about a father who somehow couldn't wrap his mind around the concept of wireless Internet. The image of the hapless dad has long roots in American pop culture. A study of comics as far back as the 1940s found "incompetent" fathers and other mocking portrayals resurging at times across the decades. But TV didn't start skewering dads frequently until much later, says Bob Thompson, director of the Bleier Center for Television and Popular Culture at Syracuse University. While dads in "Leave It to Beaver" and "The Donna Reed Show" had flaws, they were close to what was then thought of as "perfect," part of an idealized white American family. Later, shows such as "The Cosby Show," "Family Ties," "Growing Pains" and "Full House" showcased caring dads of a new generation, Thompson says. But by the late 1980s, more shows wanted to distance themselves "from the corny, syrupy stuff" -- and in stepped shows such as "Married With Children" and "The Simpsons." It's only natural that comedies would take on dads, Thompson says. "Comedy is about inversion -- taking people who are in authority and control and making them the butt of jokes." So in a society "that has been so dominated by men... comedy is naturally going to play against that." Dads on TV today are presented in so many different ways that it's impossible to say things are getting better or worse, he says. From the stay-at-home dad in "Up All Night" to the lovable dads in "Modern Family," relatively positive portrayals abound. Thompson says the growing push for "recognizable" dads who reflect today's realities are probably to credit for these characters. Meanwhile, dramas such as "Game of Thrones" and "Mad Men" show such bad fathers that "you'd beg social services" to put their children in a foster home with Al Bundy, he jokes. Plus, thanks to modern media, people now can always create their own videos about dads and, sometimes, watch them go viral. To some, the idea that anyone would be upset over this stereotype is ridiculous. Huggies' Facebook page has hundreds of posts from women and men saying they found the original ads funny. "The problem these days is everyone has lost their sense of humor," Christine Lee wrote. And every group of people -- including moms -- gets caricatured and stereotyped on TV. Do some dads just need to lighten up? No, says Chris Routly. There's a growing rejection of stereotypes in general -- and that should apply to dads as well, he argues. He's also concerned that boys and men "see the bumbling dad ... and think that's what's expected of them," the stay-at-home father of two told me by phone while baking chips for his kids out of kale from his garden. "They're not expected to be good, so they rise to the low bar that's set for them." And it can lead girls and women to have low expectations for how their husbands will handle fatherhood, he says. Part of the problem, Routly says, is that a lot of people believe negative stereotypes really apply to far more dads than they do. I ran into that myself last year. A column on CNN.com by a stay-at-home father complained that "most" dads "just wanna chill in front of SportsCenter with a bowl of chips" after work and complain to their stay-at-home wives about how hard they work. On his blog, the writer railed against the "millions of dads who view their days at home as recovery from work." I responded with a long list of studies showing how well dads are actually doing, including this from Pew Research: "Almost all fathers who live with their children take an active role in their day-to-day lives through activities such as sharing meals, helping with homework and playing." While by far most of the responses I received were positive, some were from angry people insisting the negative depictions must accurately describe the average dad. Routly says he received hate mail after launching his petition. "There are people who are so invested in maintaining these kinds of roles and stereotypes that they felt like they needed to attack me." But he also heard from men thanking him and sharing stories of custody battles and judges who assumed they weren't as good at parenting simply because they're men. While there's seriousness behind their complaints about the stereotype, these dads insist they can take a joke. "By and large, men are willing to laugh at themselves," says Holland. "But there just becomes a point where you say, 'OK, the first 400 of these were funny.' " And Thompson of the Bleier Center, himself a dad, says he enjoys laughing at these depictions, which exaggerate characteristics of some fathers, even today. "As long as there are clueless bumbling men there will be clueless bumbling dads," he says. "I'm sure there were clueless bumbling cavemen. Actually, his name was Fred Flintstone!"[/quote] [url]http://edition.cnn.com/2012/06/12/living/dumb-dad-stereotype/index.html[/url] I blame television.

[QUOTE=shian;36312560] I blame television.[/QUOTE] I blame videogames.

I blame this motherfucker: [IMG]http://www.simpsoncrazy.com/content/pictures/homer/HomerSimpson48.gif[/IMG]

they have a point but wouldn't it make more sense to work on all negative stereotypes? like the whole "women are always the caretaker" thing that is the entire reason the "bumbling dads" trend came to exist in the first place? work on making everything less shitty, not just your issues

[QUOTE=Kopimi;36312646]they have a point but wouldn't it make more sense to work on all negative stereotypes? like the whole "women are always the caretaker" thing that is the entire reason the "bumbling dads" trend came to exist in the first place? work on making everything less shitty, [B]not just your issues[/B][/QUOTE] And how many feminists work on reducing the stereotypes of men? Or minorities? Why are you always focussing everything on women?

[QUOTE=Impact1986;36313598]And how many feminists work on reducing the stereotypes of men? Or minorities? Why are you always focussing everything on women?[/QUOTE] they don't focus on stereotypes of men or white people because they are literally bottom priority when it comes to correcting discrimination

[QUOTE=Itachi_Crow;36313668]they don't focus on stereotypes of men or white people because they are literally bottom priority when it comes to correcting discrimination[/QUOTE] Which is another issue entirely. Should we really be "prioritizing" something like this? That's a type of discrimination in and of itself. If we're going to correct discrimination, then we should be trying to do it for everyone at once.

I've always been annoyed by ads that portray this. I can't even count how many there are.

That and Stupid White People, it's rare that you go a commercial break without seeing one of these.

[QUOTE=Impact1986;36313598]And how many feminists work on reducing the stereotypes of men? Or minorities? Why are you always focussing everything on women?[/QUOTE] i've said the same thing about feminist groups as well.. in the future you should avoid basing your insults on posting habits that don't exist [editline]13th June 2012[/editline] [QUOTE=Zillamaster55;36313910]That and Stupid White People, it's rare that you go a commercial break without seeing one of these.[/QUOTE] in america? i honestly can't think of any examples of "stupid white people"

[QUOTE=Impact1986;36313598]And how many feminists work on reducing the stereotypes of men? Or minorities? [/QUOTE] i imagine a lot of them?

funny how the media (aka fake scenarios, fake families, fake characters) influences us so much more than real people

clearly every male child should aspire to be like Hank Hill.

[QUOTE=Jmir 54;36315182]clearly every male child should aspire to be like Hank Hill.[/QUOTE] dangit bobby

Human beings unlike stereotypes in television, more at 11

Or... or how about this? [B]Who cares?[/B]

There's also positive role models portrayed, like Walter White.

hey guys when you don't agree with something or rate something dumb, at least be courteous enough to fucking post why you thought that way.

[QUOTE=thisispain;36315895]hey guys when you don't agree with something or rate something dumb, at least be courteous enough to fucking post why you thought that way.[/QUOTE] You already know why I rated you dumb.

[QUOTE=thisispain;36315895]hey guys when you don't agree with something or rate something dumb, at least be courteous enough to fucking post why you thought that way.[/QUOTE] That defeats the purpose of the rating system.

They forgot Tim the Toolman and Andy Griffith.

[QUOTE=Kopimi;36312646]they have a point but wouldn't it make more sense to work on all negative stereotypes? like the whole "women are always the caretaker" thing that is the entire reason the "bumbling dads" trend came to exist in the first place? work on making everything less shitty, not just your issues[/QUOTE] Tell that to MLK. [editline]13th June 2012[/editline] [QUOTE=thisispain;36314617]i imagine a lot of them?[/QUOTE] Didn't you make a post a few threads ago about how feminism is all about women?

[QUOTE=Capitulazyguy;36316277]Tell that to MLK.[/QUOTE] huh? how does MLK have anything to do with this

[QUOTE=Kopimi;36316297]huh? how does MLK have anything to do with this[/QUOTE] What did he ever do for gays, trans*, women? Selfish dick just focussed on blacks instead of everyone :downs:.

[QUOTE=Capitulazyguy;36316334]What did he ever do for gays, trans*, women? Selfish dick just focussed on blacks instead of everyone :downs:.[/QUOTE] He preached for everyone to be at peace

[QUOTE=Capitulazyguy;36316334]What did he ever do for gays, trans*, women? Selfish dick just focussed on blacks instead of everyone :downs:.[/QUOTE] well considering the black civil rights movement was unarguably a million times more severe and urgent than all of those issues at the time, and seeing as how none of those issues have any remote relation to the civil rights movement, i can see why he would only focus on helping the black community + never called these dudes dicks, just like i don't call feminists who focus only on women dicks. all i said was that it'd make more sense to focus on both sides of the sexism issue because each side feeds the other, and you aren't going to solve anything by just focusing either on men/women separately.

[QUOTE=Capitulazyguy;36316277] Didn't you make a post a few threads ago about how feminism is all about women?[/QUOTE] yeah [b]feminism[/b] [b]feminists[/b] however aren't one-sided characters who only believe in one thing. he said "how many feminists work on reducing the stereotypes of men? Or minorities?" and i said i imagine a lot of them because feminists usually tend to support LGBT and anti-racism as well. [editline]13th June 2012[/editline] [QUOTE=Impact1986;36316078]You already know why I rated you dumb.[/QUOTE] because you don't have the ability to formulate a response so you opted for a small image? if you think i'm wrong or dumb, why don't you prove me wrong or dumb?