coworker takes a 2 hour dump every day - General

I'm working for an estate agent and my co worker (from the employment agency) goes to the toilet everyday after his lunch break. I've already spoken to him about it, but he says its a basic need and I don't know what to do. Allegedly he often has flatulences, so he told me. :mad: Can he really go to the shitter for 2 hours every day? Of course he is paid by the hour. I need him, otherwise all the work sticks to me. Just wanna make him understand that it can't be like this.

have sex with him [highlight](User was banned for this post ("Spam" - Hexxeh))[/highlight]

Go into the washroom while he's taking a shit and slap him as many times as possible. [highlight](User was banned for this post ("Why reply?" - Jaanus))[/highlight]

He's probably fapping on the toilet seats.

Tell your boss, going for a 2 hour dump is a shitty thing to do.

[QUOTE=sp00ks;23615145]Tell your boss, going for a 2 hour dump is a shitty thing to do.[/QUOTE] If I tell my boss he will probably get fired. I can't do that. @Micr0 and WillerinV1.02: I have contacted a moderator because of your spam. If you think "have sex with him" is a valid answer then go back to preschool.

Fapping on the job huh. [editline]02:50PM[/editline] [QUOTE=Bacongrave;23615150]If I tell my boss he will probably get fired. I can't do that.[/QUOTE] Speak some sense into his brain

[QUOTE=Bacongrave;23615150]If I tell my boss he will probably get fired. I can't do that.[/QUOTE] Yeah you should totally keep doing his share of the work while he shits on you and gets payed.

Go to the toilet at the same time as him and stay there for as long as it takes him. Strike up some conversation and just generally be annoying. If he asks why you're sticking around just say you had a large breakfast.

[QUOTE=Bacongrave;23615150] @Micr0 and WillerinV1.02: I have contacted a moderator because of your spam.[/QUOTE] Oh lighten up.

[QUOTE=Bacongrave;23615150] @Micr0 and WillerinV1.02: I have contacted a moderator because of your spam.[/QUOTE] That was uncalled for bro'. [sp]I did too[/sp]:mmmsmug:

[QUOTE=FoxMeister;23615190] Strike up some conversation and just generally be annoying. If he asks why you're sticking around just say you had a large breakfast.[/QUOTE] If I go missing for that long people will notice. He is just that guy who does odd jobs around the office so nobody misses me except me, who has to take care of him. I thought about taking it to the boss but then I will have messed it up completely with that guy and I have to do his work. Also they probably wont get a replacement anytime soon either. [QUOTE=Micr0;23615210]Oh lighten up.[/QUOTE] All you do is shitpost in threads, if you don't know the answer, leave.

Seriously, just tell your boss. He probably won't get fired for taking shits for too long.

[QUOTE=Micr0;23615231]Seriously, just tell your boss. He probably won't get fired for taking shits for too long.[/QUOTE] He did that for almost a month now. If they understand he basically steals payment for 2 hours EVERYDAY they will most likely fire him. [editline]02:57PM[/editline] You probably can't forbid him to use the toilet, but isn't there a maximum? Some law? 15 minutes max or something?

Of course, my dad takes 3 hour ones.

Well if you don't want him to get fired you gotta take some action. You have to really confront him on it. Tell him it's not natural to take a 2 hour shit every day and that he's leaving too much work on your shoulders.

Then he tells me how its not his fault that he has diarrhea.

Well tell him to go to the doctor.

[QUOTE=Bacongrave;23615219]All you do is shitpost in threads, if you don't know the answer, leave.[/QUOTE] The "answer" is that you should stop being so anal about your coworkers bowel movements

[QUOTE=FoxMeister;23615286]The "answer" is that you should stop being so anal about your coworkers bowel movements[/QUOTE] He is paid to do a job there. He works 5 hours, and from those he is 2 hours shitting.

I think you should hide in the next stall, and slowly peek underneath the stall, and when he makes eye contact, wink at him and run out of the restroom.

I seriously don't know why you don't want him fired, he's an asshole. He's supposed to be helping you, but instead he's just getting paid for jerking off for 2 hours.

[QUOTE=Micr0;23615318]I seriously don't know why you don't want him fired, he's an asshole. He's supposed to be helping you, he's essentially getting paid for jerking off for 2 hours.[/QUOTE] They were looking for a guy for like 6 months, if I get this guy fired they won't find a new one for a long time. They also only take them from the employment agency.

[QUOTE=Bacongrave;23615300]He is paid to do a job there. He works 5 hours, and from those he is 2 hours shitting.[/QUOTE] And all you do is sit on your ass and not tell your boss.

[QUOTE=IDTL;23615338]And all you do is sit on your ass and not tell your boss.[/QUOTE] All I do is work 10 hours, and I probably need to do overtime if they fire him. Isn't there a law that limits the time on the crapper to 15 minutes or something?

You should seriously just kick open the stall and punch him in the face as hard as you can.

[QUOTE=Bacongrave;23615150]If I tell my boss he will probably get fired. I can't do that. @Micr0 and WillerinV1.02: I have contacted a moderator because of your spam. If you think "have sex with him" is a valid answer then go back to preschool.[/QUOTE] What? It was a serious suggestion. I once got a ticket and I bent him over the hood of my car and ravaged that asshole. no ticket for me.

Knock on the stall door after 20 minutes and tell him to hurry up.

Go in there and make sure it's really quiet, so the only sound you hear is the "plop plop plop" of him taking a shit. Then let out a war cry and throw yourself against the stall door like "RAAAAAAAAARGH *THUD*" and that will be sure to get him out (you probably won't win any points with the janitor though).

[QUOTE=Bacongrave;23615300]He is paid to do a job there. He works 5 hours, and from those he is 2 hours shitting.[/QUOTE] Not only is he a douchebag, he's also a crappy worker. Tell your boss, he should know he's paying this for taking a shit.