I wrote this poem about my addiction with Amphetamines. This is the first poem I've written since English class in High school where I was forced to write a poem for a grade. The poem is below, thanks for reading.
[B]Speed[/B]
[B]_____________________________________[/B]
Speed is a thing I do and a thing I use,
and the problem is, it's too easy to abuse.
It makes me feel loose.
It makes me feel mean.
when I'm speeding, my carpet's always clean.
Speed is a bad thing, a bad thing for real.
You'll stay up for days and dislike the way you feel.
It feels great at first.
It feels great being alert.
When I'm speeding, I'll make it to first.
The first time I did speed was when I was sixteen.
Now I am older and having trouble quitting.
It makes me stay awake.
It makes me feel great.
when I'm speeding, I'll never, ever be late.
But speed brings problems, and these problems are real.
I can't stand being up five days in a row.
But I can't help it, because I don't like when things are real.
After a while things begin to lose their flow.
You get confuzed and wonder what's going on.
It's from the speed, you've just been up too long,
and things only start to go wrong.
Not just from no sleep, but the people who's there all along.
They lose faith in you,
They lose trust in you,
and most of all, they lose "you".
It makes me feel good.
It makes me feel like I should.
When I'm speeding, I become as careless as I could.
It was because I was speeding, that's why I acted like I would...
[B]_____________________________________[/B]
It's kind of cheesy, it reminds me of something Doctor Seuss would write. Some of the rhymes don't rhyme, and a few of the lines are kind of crammed and awkward.
EX: When I'm speeding, I'll make it to first.
EX: Now I am older and having trouble quitting.
EX: But I can't help it, because I don't like when things are real.
EX: After a while things begin to lose their flow.
The whole thing just seems too forced, like it was about daffodils or something.
"Speed is a bad thing, a bad thing for real" You tried too hard to rhyme this line, it jus seemd awkward and kind of dumb.
not bad overall, but very flimsy and unoriginal.
I understand what you're saying, infact it also reminded me of Dr. Suess haha. I don't write poems, I dunno why I decided to post it. I normally write music.
gotta go fast
But seriously, Potanis has it down. Not really anything special.
Dr. Seuss reincarnated
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