Gotta 48 hour Xbox live card, A female voicemask, and an internet guide to being a slut. - General

There's this one girl that's a slut in my friends list, she joined Xbox live about a month ago, and her friends list is full of 40 year olds or horney 12 year olds. On top of that, she was a 15 year old girl that talks about dick sucking and MW2. Now I suspected she was a guy, cause she was the perfect woman for any horney person ages 12-70. So then I got a hold of a 48 hour xbox live membership card, a decent female voicemask, and an internet guide to being a slut. I then Created an account named Headshot Parsley (or something along the lines of that) Ok, so the first hour, I started playing every favorite single man's game, Left 4 Dead 2. So far, I acted like a drunk 14 year old blond wanting to work at hooters when she grows up. The first server match thing was filled with 5 10-16 year old boys, all with mics. I starting my opening line ( acting like a drunk 14 year old blond wanting to work at hooters when she grows up) "Hia all, does anyone know how to get the Hard Rain Achievement? It sounds naughty, what do I have to do?" One 12 year old told me to fuck off (he was later kicked after that), 2 of the kids asked for my email address, (I gave them a fake one :downs:), one of them shot cheesy pick up line at me (which made me feel extremely uncomfortable), one guy kept asking my age and 'Where I was at', (I replied with bisexual, hopeing that's what I wanted) then the other guy asked if I played Runescape, and I think the other won was either shy, or away. Then they all sent me friend requests (excluding the shy/away guy). I then played with them (the shy guy was autokicked for being away for too long), I was then bitching how "Zoey wasn't in Left 4 Dead 2, cause she was a sexy bitch", while collecting more than half of the gas cans in scavenge. Later 2 people just ragequited, so there was just 2 people asking for phone sex. I later left, blocked them all so they wouldn't conflict with the next match I was going to. The 2nd match I went to was filled with rapping black guys, and a white guy (he was one of the black guy's bitch). I later then said "Hia guys!" and they all asked me if I was a girl or a guy, I replied with girl, and one started singing a shit love song to me, I then blocked everyone, and left before the match started. I got bored of L4D2, so I started to play MW2.it made me join in the middle of the game, and since I was new, I kept using the default sniper class. I didn't talk until one person asked if I played before. I replied with a girly: Yep". He asked if I was female, and I said yes. Then after I answered that question, a redneck said "Girls shouldn't play games, they should be in the kitchen. Then 5 other guys started raging on the redneck. It was funny. The redneck kept running in the open, trying to make us loose like the little shit he was. I left the match and started playing free for all, it was in the middle of the match when someone was playing "Soldier Boy" in the background (or some other shit song like that). I told him (in my drunk 14 year old blond wanting to work at hooters when she grows up way) to turn it down. After that, everyone was sending friend requests and messages telling me to accept them. So I had about 10-15 messages and friend requests in my inbox. I then joined a laggy ass game in progress, and asked "Who's dick do I have to suck to get a decent internet connection? Now everyone started calling me gay, and I realized my voicemask was off. So I blocked everyone, and ragequitted without saying anything. I later played Halo 3,hoping it wasn't all scratched up, checked if I turned on my voicemask, and joined one of my friend's custom matches, with about 13 people (including me). I then started hitting on my friend (incoming gaybows), he then told me to keep it down cause his dad is right there, I then screamed his full name, MICHEAL MORGAN, CAN I SUCK YOUR COCK? /caps. I later heard in the backround "Who the fuck is that?" I then left howling with laughter (rate me hearts). I got bored, and I started feeling all gay inside, so I started to go on facepunch and look at the Hot Girls thread in fast threads. Then after I had a raging boner, I started to post my sorry about the experience I had today. tl;dr got a voicemask, started being a slut, got alot of friends, asked my friend if I could suck his cock.

thats nice, how would you like this thread to go?

[quote]I then started hitting on my friend (incoming gaybows), he then told me to keep it down cause his dad is right there, I then screamed his full name, MICHEAL MORGAN, CAN I SUCK YOUR COCK? /caps. I later heard in the backround "Who the fuck is that?" I then left howling with laughter (rate me hearts).[/quote] that's just cruel

-snip-

This sounds like an in-depth look into male depravity on Xbox Live. I laughed at the ''can I suck your cock?'' bit.

[QUOTE=BrQ;23946751]that's just cruel[/QUOTE] He was an ass that hated canadians and jews

Did he find out that it was you?

why the hell didn't you record this

[QUOTE=BrQ;23946751]that's just cruel[/QUOTE] it's still fucking hilarious

[QUOTE=Anastatius;23946775]Did he find out that it was you?[/QUOTE] No

This was done better then I really thought it was be. Nice job OP. :golfclap:

-snip-

That was the best story I've ever heard. [editline]05:24PM[/editline] [QUOTE=DainBramageStudios;23946782]why the hell didn't you record this[/QUOTE] Also this.

[QUOTE=ROFLBURGER;23946773]He was an ass that hated canadians and jews[/QUOTE] ....Cartman?

This was indeed a pretty cool story. Spelling was a bit lacking but still pretty cool story, "sis".

How do you get a voicemask may I ask?

[QUOTE=butters757;23946958]....Cartman?[/QUOTE] He's a fan of him, I belive

Good story. But you have earned a gaybow from me.

[QUOTE=QuickSnapz;23946992]How do you get a voicemask may I ask?[/QUOTE] Halloween sexy section in your local shopping mall

[QUOTE=ROFLBURGER;23946639] I then joined a laggy ass game in progress, and asked "Who's dick do I have to suck to get a decent internet connection? Now everyone started calling me gay, and I realized my voicemask was off. So I blocked everyone, and ragequitted without saying anything.[/QUOTE] :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

[QUOTE=ROFLBURGER;23947018]Halloween sexy section in your local shopping mall[/QUOTE] Thanks bro.

Do it again, but record it & post on Facepunch. Will be 10x funnier.

[url=http://www.homemadesexvideo.com/pics/blonde_amateur_girl_sucking_hard_cock.jpg] http://www.homemadesexvideo.com/pics/blonde_amateur_girl_sucking_hard_cock.jpg [/url] Artist Depiction of the event that could of happened if the OP was actually a female and got laid by her best friend.

Holy balls that is incredible Going to buy myself a voicemask and try this out sometime.

Voicemask for Xbox 360?

I need to remember to try this sometime. Sounds like fun.

[QUOTE=sonicrjk;23948119]Voicemask for Xbox 360?[/QUOTE] Talked through one into the mic I imagine.

I swear you can just make a new account and you get 1 month of gold free. I remember I made an account and would go to Gears of War matches where they would achievement whore and I'd fuck it up for them all.

It really would make for an interesting study.

[QUOTE=Ali Legend;23948280]I swear you can just make a new account and you get 1 month of gold free. I remember I made an account and would go to Gears of War matches where they would achievement whore and I'd fuck it up for them all.[/QUOTE] Only with a certain amounts of accounts, and not on the core either.