God damned toilet! - General

I hate my toilet. I hate it with a passion. A few months ago, (During the spring) we've had a mysterious stain appear on the pantry ceiling. Day after day, we watched it get bigger. Then there was a sort of bulge appearing, something was weighing the tiles down, and they looked like they would give way any second. My family, being the procrastinators we are, never did anything about it. We never tried to find out the problem. Anyway, the ceiling gave out, a few ceiling tiles fell down in the middle of a night and whenever someone flushed the toilet, it would rain water for a few minutes in the pantry. (And no, it wasn't brown water) So obviously, a pipe that runs water to the toilet goes over the pantry any it had a leak. God dammit... We couldn't find the exact location of the leak, but it was there. At first, we put a bucket under it, switching it for a new one every day or so, but this became boring, we wanted this to stop. My dad, not one to spend time searching for a leak decided to just turn off the toilet water. This worked wonders, the leak stopped. Okay, it didn't work wonders since he turned off the toilet water. This meant that we couldn't flush the toilet, there was no water to do so. We fixed this little issue by getting a bucket to flush the toilet with. We'd fill it up at the bathtub, leave it by the toilet and pour it down to flush. While this does work, it's a nuisance to have to fill up a bucket every time I let out my ass goblins. But there was no fix for that, other than, you know, [B]fixing the damned pipe![/B] Of course, this all still got me steamed. Steamed like a steaming pile of rectum warriors. The bucket was a massive nuisance, one I couldn't get over. We're in an age where we have toilets that flush themselves (Although they always flush at the wrong time, and they don't flush at the right time) and we're stuck with a bucket. I'm pissed at my toilet and I'm not taking any more of this shit. That pipe's getting fixed whether it likes it or not. Now, where's the duct tape? [highlight](User was banned for this post ("I'm back. Fun is over." - garry))[/highlight]

I suggest rubber cement.

Not that much people even have toilets that flush themselves.

[QUOTE=hl2poo;18143961]Not that much people even have toilets that flush themselves.[/QUOTE] It's mostly public toilets, but still!

[img]http://www.harrietcarter.com/resources/harrietCarter/images/products/processed/7981.zoom.a.jpg[/img] I suggest this.

one time I took a shit so big it clogged the toiled and broke the waste pipe. it was gross

[QUOTE=GamerKiwi;18143918] I'm pissed at my toilet and I'm not taking any more of this shit. [/QUOTE] I applaud you for some how managing to say shit and piss in the same sentence with toilet in it without connecting the three words in a literal sense.

[QUOTE=Protocol7;18143996]one time I took a shit so big it clogged the toiled and broke the waste pipe. it was gross[/QUOTE] I remember I broke the toilet due to big shits when I was 9. I now have to hold the flushing lever down until the toilet completely flushes. It gets annoying while you have to stand there for a long 5 seconds pushing down the lever to get your shit and piss flushed.

[QUOTE=hl2poo;18144026]I remember I broke the toilet due to big shits when I was 9. I now have to hold the flushing lever down until the toilet completely flushes. It gets annoying while you have to stand there for a long 5 seconds pushing down the lever to get your shit and piss flushed.[/QUOTE] I have such a bad pooping schedule, i go like twice a week but they're massive. I try to go more frequently but nothing's there, it's like the shit is playing ding dong ditch with my anus :argh:

I have to flush the lever twice every time i use my toilet so that the back refills. It's not that bad until you have a retarded dad that doesn't go by this virtue. So usually when I piss I have to wait for the toilet to refill and THEN flush.

[QUOTE=Protocol7;18144052]I have such a bad pooping schedule, i go like twice a week but they're massive. I try to go more frequently but nothing's there, it's like the shit is playing ding dong ditch with my anus :argh:[/QUOTE] Put more whole wheat in your diet.

blast it with piss

don't hate your toilet hate your lazy ass fucking family

dude if its small just tape it

i have ass goblins too

[QUOTE=Protocol7;18143996]one time I took a shit so big it clogged the toiled and broke the waste pipe. it was gross[/QUOTE] i once took a shit and it took like 7 minutes to come out it was at least a a foot and a half long and clogged up the toilet it was awesome

thought this was going to be a story about you shitting into the toilet and it does something and youre all like oh fuck oh fuck

I SUGGEST YOU erEMOVE YOUR FAGGOTY ASS FROM SOCIETY

I suggest calling a plumber if your dads too lazy to do something about it.

If you're going to bitch fix the pipe yourself.

Duct tape wont work. I suggest silver tape

Oh, these threads again.

[QUOTE=GamerKiwi;18143918]I hate my toilet. I hate it with a passion. A few months ago, (During the spring) we've had a mysterious stain appear on the pantry ceiling. Day after day, we watched it get bigger. Then there was a sort of bulge appearing, something was weighing the tiles down, and they looked like they would give way any second. My family, being the procrastinators we are, never did anything about it. We never tried to find out the problem. Anyway, the ceiling gave out, a few ceiling tiles fell down in the middle of a night and whenever someone flushed the toilet, it would rain water for a few minutes in the pantry. (And no, it wasn't brown water) So obviously, a pipe that runs water to the toilet goes over the pantry any it had a leak. God dammit... We couldn't find the exact location of the leak, but it was there. At first, we put a bucket under it, switching it for a new one every day or so, but this became boring, we wanted this to stop. My dad, not one to spend time searching for a leak decided to just turn off the toilet water. This worked wonders, the leak stopped. Okay, it didn't work wonders since he turned off the toilet water. This meant that we couldn't flush the toilet, there was no water to do so. We fixed this little issue by getting a bucket to flush the toilet with. We'd fill it up at the bathtub, leave it by the toilet and pour it down to flush. While this does work, it's a nuisance to have to fill up a bucket every time I let out my ass goblins. But there was no fix for that, other than, you know, fixing the damned pipe! Of course, this all still got me steamed. Steamed like a steaming pile of rectum warriors. The bucket was a massive nuisance, one I couldn't get over. We're in an age where we have toilets that flush themselves (Although they always flush at the wrong time, and they don't flush at the right time) and we're stuck with a bucket. I'm pissed at my toilet and [B][highlight]I'm not taking any more of this shit[/highlight][/B]. That pipe's getting fixed whether it likes it or not. Now, where's the duct tape?[/QUOTE] It isn't taking any shit either :v: