Let me start off by saying that the following story is fucking [I]unbelievable.[/I] I really have [I]no[/I] idea how this is even remotely possible. Read on, if you will.
So after work, I stop at the Chick-Fil-A drive-thru because I'm fucking starving. Haven't eaten in hours. I finish eating on the way back to my apartment, and realize that I desperately need to take a piss. This is clearly one of those pisses that last thirty seconds to a minute. Really fucking bad. I quickly unlock the door and rush through the house to my bathroom, despite my dog going crazy.
So do you know how when you're wearing jeans just pulled down a little how they push your ballsack up? Well, I didn't realize that it was [I]just[/I] under my dick. So to prevent pissing all over the toilet seat, I push my dick down [B]right in front of my balls.[/B] The results were similar to when you put a spoon under a running faucet - the bathroom was [I]covered[/I] in piss. My boxers, jeans and shirt were soaked, there was piss all over the floor, on the walls, in the shower, on the counter, in the sink, on the mirror. Piss was on every fucking visible surface.
So after about five minutes of cleaning up the entire bathroom and changing my clothes, I let out a heavy sigh before turning off the bathroom light and walking down the hallway. I step in a yellow puddle. [B]The piss reached the fucking hallway.[/B] I don't even understand how, seeing as how the door is pointing at the mirror and I'm several feet to the left of the mirror. It's fucking mind-boggling.
So, FP.. Here I am, sitting at my desk, pondering this situation. Post your thoughts.
[B]tl;dr:[/B] my balls get in the way of my dick, results in piss-covered bathroom
[B]EDIT: [IMG]https://dl.dropbox.com/u/2866863/diagram.png[/IMG][/B]
At least you didn't shit all over everything and the place doesn't look like Fudge Camp. *Shiver*
i've always wanted to piss everywhere, carelessly
[QUOTE=El Gigante;20635761]At least you didn't shit all over everything and the place doesn't look like Fudge Camp. *Shiver*[/QUOTE]
that would be so hot omg
[QUOTE=KSI;20635766]i've always wanted to piss everywhere, carelessly[/QUOTE]
People at my school do that all the time.
[QUOTE=CzechOutMyBapes;20635774]that would be so hot omg[/QUOTE]
Warm maybe, but not hot. Not in a literal sense at least.
What's with this trend??
1: Do something completely retarded
2: Make a post about it on FP
3: ???
4: No your thread sucks, no profit for you :mad:
it seems you aren't the best marksman in the bathroom
I think the piss in the hallway could have been from your dog?
HAHA
Ow wow OP. I did this when I was 5.
It was probably already there since that's how most fast food restaraunt's bathrooms usually look.
Advice if your balls get in the way, sit on the damn toilet.
[QUOTE=steven20;20635793]I think the piss in the hallway could have been from your dog?[/QUOTE]
He's got a point there OP
I can't help but feel this thread is missing a poorly drawn MS Paint image to help us comprehend the situation fully.
This is one of those threads that need Paint images.
[QUOTE=steven20;20635793]I think the piss in the hallway could have been from your dog?[/QUOTE]
It's possible, but I don't think he would. He's trained and he's never pissed in the house before.
Girl you nasty
[QUOTE=Ezhik;20635839]This is one of those threads that need Paint images.[/QUOTE]
You're right. I'll update the OP with a diagram in a few minutes.
So...
You didn't clean up the piss in the hall?
Piss sitting down :smug:
[QUOTE=^0mKTank;20635919]So...
You didn't clean up the piss in the hall?[/QUOTE]
I did, but I didn't say that in the OP.
[QUOTE=TheIceman;20635808]Advice if your balls get in the way, sit on the damn toilet.[/QUOTE]
ttsk only girls do that
A++, were you pissed?
Updated OP with a diagram.
[QUOTE=Dark Link;20636012]Updated OP with a diagram.[/QUOTE]
Excellent, this thread is now complete.
[QUOTE=BrQ;20635956]ttsk only girls do that[/QUOTE]
Or you know, people that don't want to spray the surrounding area with a light mist of piss
yet another ms paint picture that is not needed
Dear stickman on diagram,
your fellow member looks like a mushroom going :x, but with it's right eye vertically closed.
Greetings
I don't fully get it how your balls got in the way of your pee.
Your story reminds me of this:
[url]http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=120921191[/url]
The ms paint picture didn't load up at first. So I was dissapointed. Then it did, and I turned into M.Bison for a few seconds. Also, how can you muck up so bad.
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