Note: I do not plan on actually doing this nor do I believe that anyone should. However, you cannot say that this would not work, or at least be partly beneficial. Or can you.
This is a theory that a friend and I came up with a few years ago on saving the world. Akin to Jonathan Swifts [url=http://art-bin.com/art/omodest.html] "A Modest Proposal" [/url] this theory revolves around the idea of killing all of the worlds fat people, and by doing so ridding the world of five great problems (hence the "five birds, one stone" metaphor). Let me explain.
One of the leading causes of death in America is obesity. Considering the rate at which these creatures are dying, it seems only fair to put them out of their misery sooner (simply a nice little nudge off the diving board), rather than waiting for them to waste another plastic surgeons time that could otherwise be spent on beautiful, skinny people.
When we kill all of the worlds fat people, the world would be rid of the following.
1. [highlight] Obesity [/highlight] Yes, all of the worlds fat people are dead. After we kill them all, we implement a system that monitors the mankind's weight -- if a person is over a certain weight, we give them a time period to remove said weight. If they do not remove the weight in the allotted time period, they are killed.
2. [highlight] World Hunger [/highlight] Fat people have a lot of meat. We eat them.
3. [highlight] Poverty [/highlight] We take the fat people's money and distribute it among the poor. OR we could make those who are overweight work in highly physical/dangerous fields to allow them to loose weight and provide cheap labor for developing countries etc.
4. [highlight] Housing [/highlight] Fat people usually have houses, due to the nature that they must have some place to replenish their extraneous amounts of poor metabolisms. Take their houses, give them to them to those in need.
5. [highlight] Miscellaneous tools/weapons [/highlight] Native Americans always said that we should use every part of the body. Their bones can be used for spears, arrows, building equipment, piano keys, and other replacements for ivory (thus also saving the elephants). The fat, of which they have a lot, can be used to make lots and lots of soap and bombs, therefore making the world cleaner and safer against alien invasion.
FAQ's:
How will we kill the fat people?
Their are multiple ways to kill a fat person. Perhaps the easiest way to do this would be to poison all the food in world with a poison that can only leave your body if you exercise.
What if they fight back?
Haha
The end.
TL;DR To save the world, we must kill all the fat people.
[highlight](User was banned for this post ("Didn't read the rules sticky" - Dragon))[/highlight]
Oh hey, i have a great idea, let's eat fat people because they are fat and we are skinny and we need their fat because we are skinny, and they don't need fat because their fat.
:v:
wat
"One of the leading causes of death in America is obesity"
not even close to leading more like 83rd on the list
please say you are a troll
you do realise fat people spend more money on things like food which give farmers more money to make food thereby making more food
[quote]Location
civilized people,[/quote]
what for people with iq's at 60
Just remove america, fat people begone
Why not use the 5 birds you spoke of and feed them to the poor?
I came into this thread expecting some sort of genius slingshot and a line five birds.
I am extremely disappointed.
[QUOTE=JohnEdwards;16334328]"One of the leading causes of death in America is obesity"
not even close to leading more like 83rd on the list
please say you are a troll
you do realise fat people spend more money on things like food which give farmers more money to make food thereby making more food[/QUOTE]
you're not american are you
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