I wrote this while waiting for class to end one day. Thought Id post it to see what you guys think.
In truth this is only the first half but my paper is now so crumbled that i cant read it anymore.
[B][I]Words of Love[/I][/B]
I’ve been thinking
And I’ve realized that the very things that make us human are words.
For in the beginning, there were only words,
Words of hope, love, hate, sadness, and fate.
We used these words to describe our world
For in the end, all we can use are words.
Without words, all of the feelings that are shared would be lost
And without words, “you” and “I” would cease to exist along with all our hopes, and dreams.
But we have words
Words to describe all that we are
And words that guide us to something better
It doesn’t matter what language we speak
Or what we speak
All that matters is that we speak heartfully and respectfully to the people that we love, cherish and respect.
Because, in doing that, we share our thoughts with them.
For this reason, I wish to open my heart and put all words of hate, sadness, and fear aside
And instead fill these words with all my hope
To say
I love you
hope to hear your feedback
And without "words," your poem would be two lines long. I kid. I thought that poem was very profound. I have no specific suggestion or criticism, but I think if you refined it some, it could be more than just a poem. That's a damn good philosophy you have there.
Humans existed before language so I don't see where this poem is coming from
[QUOTE=KmartSqrl;31514694]Humans existed before language so I don't see where this poem is coming from[/QUOTE]
But still, only through communication were we able to get this far. Without a definite word, you would
have a lot more trouble coming up with an advanced thought process. Just try to see how long you can
go without thinking of a word.
Words just represent concepts, people that are deaf and mute can still be complex thinkers you know.
[QUOTE=wewt!;31514904]Words just represent concepts, people that are deaf and mute can still be complex thinkers you know.[/QUOTE]
It isn't just the capacity for thought, but the ability to represent that thought. Think Orwell. I have never heard that argument before, though. I'll remember that.
Me neither. Thank you for your viewpoint, but I still argue that words make it alot easier.
It's a profound poem, more-so than much other poetry found here. My only advice would be to try and use the least amount of words to write a poem about words, some lines can be long and awkward to read. It's as if your describing something you don't really know how to describe.
[QUOTE=viperxix;31526385]Me neither. Thank you for your viewpoint, but I still argue that words make it alot easier.[/QUOTE]
I agree, they do make it easier to express your thoughts, I only disagreed with the statement that they make it harder to form an advanced thought process :v:
[QUOTE=k00lwhip;31533698]It's a profound poem, more-so than much other poetry found here. My only advice would be to try and use the least amount of words to write a poem about words, some lines can be long and awkward to read. It's as if your describing something you don't really know how to describe.[/QUOTE]
I knew it looked a bit awkward, but couldn't think of a way to fix it. I'll take your advice and try to
shorten it, and maybe start a thesis about how words are part of the thought process.
OP, mind if I say this to my girlfriend?
as long as my girlfriend doesn't find out.
[code]
local situation
if (itsDivine.girlfriend == viperxix.girlfriend) then
situation = hilarity.ensue()
end[/code]
Since we all hear our voices in our heads when we think from memory. I wonder how deaf, blind people think.
Also
[code]
Person me = new Person("Been thinking.", viperxix, facepunch);
me.realize(humans.equals(words));
while(beginning)
{
words.only();
words.describe(world);
}
if(end)
{
words.allYouCanUse(true);
}
while(words==false)
{
sharedFeelings.delete();
you.delete();
me.delete();
hopes.delete();
dreams.delete();
}
words.have();
words.describe("All that we are.");
words.guide("Something better.");
words.language.relevant=false;
words.what.relevant=false;
while(words.speak==true&&words.toWho.equals(people.type.equals("love"||"cherish"||"respect"))
{
words.way="heartfully"+"respectfully";
words.result=people.shareWith();
}
heart.open();
for(word w :: words)
{
if(w.type.equals(hate)||w.type.equals(sadness)||w.type.equals(fear))
{
w.delete();
w.set=hope.all();
}
words.speak("I love you");
}[/code]
nerd love is the best love.
[B]My first love poem:[/B]
[QUOTE]
I met her on the stairs,
I'm wondering if she cares,
Amazed by her beauty, I watch her pass,
I hope a good heart too, she has.
Letting me closer,
I let her too,
but I dislike being forever,
her number two.
She is too special though,
can't just let her go,
I also value her as a loyal friend,
I'm like possesed by an evil fiend.
I've always been silent and shy,
but there's no stepping backwards,
I went so far but why?
I'm in too deep.. do I follow the bad roads?
Indecision and lies,
mysteries rise,
Why wouldn't she just tell me?
Why wouldn't she just believe me?
I'm sick of neverending games,
In the end, I'm the one whom everyone blames,
Toying with me all the time,
making me write this silly rhyme.
She had a taste of my desire,
she saw my heart ignite the fire,
Was it why she kept me close,
just to have fun pulling my nose?
Nevermind now,
just let us forget,
that we've ever met.
For all that used to be,
it's probably better to smother my sorrows in an embrace of a concubine.[/QUOTE]
my first love poem to someone didn't even involve the word love, only allusions and metaphorical references to it. In fact you didn't even know it was a love poem until you read the last sentence.
I'm going to try and find it.
[QUOTE=k00lwhip;31618791]my first love poem to someone didn't even involve the word love, only allusions and metaphorical references to it. In fact you didn't even know it was a love poem until you read the last sentence.
I'm going to try and find it.[/QUOTE]
That sounds like something I would really like to read. I hope you find it.
I hope this isn't cliche and cheesy (oops, wrong thread), but here is a love poem that doesn't use the word "love."
[url]http://www.artofeurope.com/shakespeare/sha3.htm[/url]
Just remember, a good love poem only needs a few things:
1) Thee's and Thou's. You can never be too archaic.
2) Comparison to celestial bodies. What girl doesn't want to be a gas giant?
3) Ambiguity. If there is one girl on Earth who doesn't think the poem is about her, you aren't doing your job.
4) Subtly hint at the end game. Use words like encounter, embrace, or consummate. Trust me.
5) Do NOT spell check. You want her to know it's from you, right?
... Then when you think you are done, throw in some more Thee's, Thou's, and maybe a Whilst.
Game over, she's yours.
[QUOTE=itsDivine;31563948]OP, mind if I say this to my girlfriend?[/QUOTE]
heyy baby let me read you this great poem I didn't write
[QUOTE=DOG-GY;31620181]heyy baby let me read you this great poem I didn't write[/QUOTE]
Hey baby let me read you this great poem I wrote you.
Since you are a girl and therefore don't go to the internet apart from facebook.
I will be getting laid tonight.
[QUOTE=Nyaa;31610130]I wonder how deaf, blind people think.[/QUOTE]
When you see an apple you recognize that it's an apple before the word that represents it. Likewise an english speaking person would then represent that concept as "apple" while a german would represent it as "apfel" (unless they're a compound bilingual, then they would represent it as both :v:). So when a blind or deaf person becomes aware of the apple they recognize that it's an apple before they think of whatever image or sense that represents its concept. In other words, wondering how a blind or deaf person thinks is like a german wondering how an english person thinks.
I have no idea if that made any sense.
[QUOTE=wewt!;31629353]When you see an apple you recognize that it's an apple before the word that represents it. Likewise an english speaking person would then represent that concept as "apple" while a german would represent it as "apfel" (unless they're a compound bilingual, then they would represent it as both :v:). So when a blind or deaf person becomes aware of the apple they recognize that it's an apple before they think of whatever image or sense that represents its concept. In other words, wondering how a blind or deaf person thinks is like a german wondering how an english person thinks.
I have no idea if that made any sense.[/QUOTE]
See I knew that. But realising how a german person thinks is easier because we have dictionaries.
But seriously what would a blind deaf person think? Like whargarbl?
Since they can't picture an apple or remember a sound since they haven't heard one.
[QUOTE=Nyaa;31631243]See I knew that. But realising how a german person thinks is easier because we have dictionaries.
But seriously what would a blind deaf person think? Like whargarbl?
Since they can't picture an apple or remember a sound since they haven't heard one.[/QUOTE]
They say that the sense of smell is closely linked with memory. I bet if a blind/deaf person were to feel, smell, and taste an apple, apfel, or whargarbl, then a combination of said senses is what that person would recall.
I bet when you feel warm, humid air, and smell body odor, you think of GMod before you even know what it is you are thinking about. I know I do.
[QUOTE=Homez;31632119]They say that the sense of smell is closely linked with memory. I bet if a blind/deaf person were to feel, smell, and taste an apple, apfel, or whargarbl, then a combination of said senses is what that person would recall.
I bet when you feel warm, humid air, and smell body odor, you think of GMod before you even know what it is you are thinking about. I know I do.[/QUOTE]
Oh wow that is a p epic explanation!
I'd really like to continue a debate about this, but alas... we're derailing the thread :(
[QUOTE=Nyaa;31625316]Hey baby let me read you this great poem I wrote you.
Since you are a girl and therefore don't go to the internet apart from facebook.
I will be getting laid tonight.[/QUOTE]
l
[editline]9th August 2011[/editline]
mao
[QUOTE=Homez;31619384]That sounds like something I would really like to read. I hope you find it.
I hope this isn't cliche and cheesy (oops, wrong thread), but here is a love poem that doesn't use the word "love."
[url]http://www.artofeurope.com/shakespeare/sha3.htm[/url]
Just remember, a good love poem only needs a few things:
1) Thee's and Thou's. You can never be too archaic.
2) Comparison to celestial bodies. What girl doesn't want to be a gas giant?
3) Ambiguity. If there is one girl on Earth who doesn't think the poem is about her, you aren't doing your job.
4) Subtly hint at the end game. Use words like encounter, embrace, or consummate. Trust me.
5) Do NOT spell check. You want her to know it's from you, right?
... Then when you think you are done, throw in some more Thee's, Thou's, and maybe a Whilst.
Game over, she's yours.[/QUOTE]
I want to believe this, but you'd be absolutely surprised at the amount of youth that simply do not know what words like 'thee' and 'thou' mean.
[QUOTE=k00lwhip;31639929]I want to believe this, but you'd be absolutely surprised at the amount of youth that simply do not know what words like 'thee' and 'thou' mean.[/QUOTE]
It was satirical. That is a list of devices you either never want to implement, or only sparingly. As for #5, that was aimed more at the stereotypical FP poster.
Don't get me wrong. I may be new here, but I love this place.
[i]Oh baby I bet your feet are so tight because you've been runnin' through my mind, ALL NIGHT[/i]
And the King of Cheesy award goes too...
my first love poem went off on a tangent about rape not being about lust but about control issues. I'm glad to see you can stick to a theme well
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