• Scientists Confirm that Chimps, Like Humans, Go to War
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Source: [URL]http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1998285,00.html?hpt=T2[/URL] [quote=Time.com] It's obvious that humans are fundamentally different from every other animal species. It's not so easy, though, to identify the specific traits that make [I]Homo sapiens[/I] so special. Scientists realized long ago that other animals make tools, play jokes and even have a sense of justice and altruism — all things we once thought were unique to our species. Now a paper in the journal [I]Current Biology[/I] has added another behavior to the list of what other animals share with us — and this one isn't quite so charming. After years of field observations in Uganda's Kibale National Park, John Mitani of Michigan State University and several colleagues have concluded that chimps wage war to conquer new territory. "We already knew that chimps kill each other," says Mitani. "We've known this for a long time." What scientists didn't know for sure, at least in cases in which groups of chimps banded together to kill others, was why. One hypothesis, advanced more than a decade ago by anthropologist Richard Wrangham, was the idea of territorial conquest; circumstantial evidence from both Gombe and Mahale National Parks in Tanzania bolstered the theory. In Mahale, for example, male members of one group mysteriously vanished, and another group then expanded into what had been their land — suggestive but not conclusive. In Gomba, an existing group dissolved into civil war, resulting in killing and land takeovers. But it's hard to say what the casus belli was and thus impossible to know if territorial combat was a key motivator. Mitani, for the first time, has gathered direct evidence of deliberate warfare. From 1999 to 2008, he and his colleagues actually observed 18 chimp-on-chimp killings, 13 of which took place in the homeland of a single neighboring group. Then, says Mitani, "last year, all of a sudden, [the aggressors] made this big land grab," moving into the territory where the 13 victims had lived. "It isn't rocket science," he says. "We put two and two together and got four." What's especially chilling about the observation is that the murder rate appears so high. The anthropologists couldn't be certain of how big a band the victims belonged to, because, unlike the aggressors, they weren't used to a human presence and thus couldn't be accurately counted. But even a conservative estimate suggests that the death rate is significantly higher than you would see in war between human hunter-gatherer groups. Mitani isn't oblivious to the lesson some people might draw from the study. "Invariably, some will take this as evidence that the roots of aggression run very deep," he says, and therefore conclude that war is our evolutionary destiny. "Even if that were true," says Mitani, "we operate by a moral code chimps don't have." Besides, he points out, the [I]Pan troglodytes[/I] chimps he studies are one of two subspecies. The other is called [I]Pan paniscus[/I], also known as bonobos, and, says Mitani, "the latter, as far as we know, aren't nearly as aggressive with respect to intergroup relations. Yet they're equally close to us." That means that if we're wired for warfare, we're wired for peace too. Ultimately, the route we choose is still up to us. [/quote] "Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape!"
Adolf Chimpler. [editline]willydicks[/editline] wow ok it wasnt that funny
Now we just need to televise it.
this week on Chimp Wars can Hulk Hogan defeat the Chimp Champion?
This is awesome. I've seen them fighting an outcast monkey though, and that was brutal, seriously, nothing we do can ever compare to the viciousness and brutality of it. We ain't got shit on the chimps. They tore off it's bottom jaw pulled out its eyes and tore of its cock and balls :ohdear:
Didn`t meerkats also wage war? They should tape it like in that show about meerkats.
I'd like to say that this is one more proof of our relation to chimps. But nobody would listen.
Gang wars? '' Lets go blast some Chimpla freaks, ChimpJ! ''
We gotta wipe them out before they get weapons of mass destruction! [B][I]"Wait... Are those Uranium Bananas?"[/I][/B]
Now we just need human vs. chimp cage-matches.
Teach them how to use guns and make a show about it.
[QUOTE=Chewy Pewp Bar;22797877]Now we just need human vs. chimp cage-matches.[/QUOTE] A human would get destroyed
maybe humans are different because they can be more diplomatic than chimps
Send in the US to bring democracy!
[QUOTE=bravehat;22797697]This is awesome. I've seen them fighting an outcast monkey though, and that was brutal, seriously, nothing we do can ever compare to the viciousness and brutality of it. We ain't got shit on the chimps. They tore off it's bottom jaw pulled out its eyes and tore of its cock and balls :ohdear:[/QUOTE] What? Where did you see this?
[QUOTE=Shoupie;22798057]What? Where did you see this?[/QUOTE] I think this one: [media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KTPkmH4hWCs[/media]
I also heard that chimps punish each other by buttfucking the "bad" one.
Yes! I always wanted to watch the rebels against the apepublic and blow up the monkeyball!
Oh yeah meercats are some badass little bastards.
[QUOTE=DarkSpider;22798009]A human would get destroyed[/QUOTE] Depends on whether tools are allowed. :v:
[QUOTE=Best4bond;22797843]We gotta wipe them out before they get weapons of mass destruction! [B][I]"Wait... Are those Uranium Bananas?"[/I][/B][/QUOTE] bananas are actually radioactive considering the fact that they have potassium-40 in them
Human specie for the win !!!
Now there will be terrorist chimps like Osama Chimp Laden.
Or a chimp hitman... [img]http://i216.photobucket.com/albums/cc75/jasonmuzie/ChimpGangster2.jpg[/img]
[img]http://christiandivine.files.wordpress.com/2008/12/conquest-of-planet-of-apes.jpg[/img] whelp, we're fucked.
They can take our land, but they can never take...our bananas!
Chimps are fucking brutal. Shit flinging and buttfucking is about as close to diplomacy as these simian BAMFs get.
[IMG]http://www.oddanimals.com/images/oddanimals168.jpg[/IMG]
If they start using mounts then I'll be worried. Or make metal weapons. Or guns D:
[QUOTE=DarkSpider;22798009]A human would get destroyed[/QUOTE] No, because when they threw in a chair we'd actually know how to use it.
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