So last night I had a nightmare and when shit started getting really messed up and weird i became aware that i was dreaming.. Everything was trying to convince me i wasn't dreaming and that it was real life but i kept pinching my arm and felt no sensation.
I was at a mall and since it was nightmare-ish circumstances i wanted to wake up. I did not like the environment or setting at all. I DEMANDED to every person in my dream that i wanted to wake up. Everyone kept telling me 'no, you are not dreaming', or 'this is real' etc.. A couple times i almost lost my self-awareness but i kept pinching my arm every 5 seconds. I was lucid enough that i knew i could lose the lucidity if i didn't keep myself aware so i was constantly pinching myself. I started getting frustrated how i couldn't wake myself up.. I started punching people and attacking them saying 'WAKE ME UP' and they wouldn't fight back or anything they would just say 'this is real'. Weird thought started running through my head while in the dream like 'maybe i can't wake up because i'm in a coma?' or 'what if this is real?'. I just kept pinching myself to make sure i didn't feel anything.
Eventually it got to the point where i was getting mad because i couldn't wake myself up. I smashed a beer bottle on the ground, picked up a chunk of glass and attacked some guy at the throat. Nothing happened. Nothing gruesome either just nothing. This whole time people kept saying 'you aren't dreaming' etc.. I remember there was a point in my dream where i stopped attacking this person and thought 'wait what if i'm really doing this?' and i became scared thinking i just went psychotic and killed a real person. Everyone in my dream was always staring at me.
I came to the conclusion in my dream (i've never been so self-aware in a lucid dream in my life) that the only way for me to wake up was to kill myself. I took a big chunk of the beer bottle and tried slashing my own throat. But i STILL could not wake up! I started panicking why I could not wake up, because for most people - you would wake up by this point!
I found a screwdriver, and i jammed it into my face just below my right eye. My whole face went numb and had no feeling. I lost control of my body and i fell to the ground. Then I saw my own body laying there, bleeding from a screwdriver sticking out of my head.
Finally I woke up 4 and a half hours after i fell asleep. I was extremely tired when i woke up, and pondered writing this all down, but it was too vivid for me to forget. I didn't want to fall back asleep right away in case I fell back into the same dream.
When I did fall back asleep, i dreamed i was in jail. Another nightmare. Except it wasn't lucid that time...
Is the seroquel what caused the nightmare and made it so i couldn't wake myself up? I find it cool/weird that my subconsciousness tried to trick me into losing my state of awareness in my dream, but i wouldn't let it fool me.
deep shit bro
Check seroquel side effects I guess, doesn't seem normal to have such a strong lucid dream like that all of a sudden
It's an anti-psychotic, you know, for crazy people. Maybe you should talk to your doctor about getting a script for it.
actually at doses for 300mg aboive it's an antipsychotic otherwise it's a sleep aid.
and i do have a script for it, jackass
[editline]7th July 2011[/editline]
fyi i took 50mg.
[editline]7th July 2011[/editline]
fuck go do some fucking research before you post and make yourself look like an idiot
[editline]7th July 2011[/editline]
[quote]It is sometimes used off-label, often as an augmentation agent, to treat conditions such as obsessive-compulsive disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, restless legs syndrome, autism, alcoholism, depression,[7] Tourette syndrome,[8] and has been used by physicians as a sedative for those with sleep disorders or anxiety disorders.[9][/quote]
hence why i'm on 25 or 50mg (phsych doc said i can choose depending how awake i am) and not 300mg or above
[editline]7th July 2011[/editline]
i have lamotrigine for my bi-polar disorder, and xanax for my anxiety and seroquel for my insomnia.
Seroquil was the first "durg" I have ever taken. My legs couldn't stop twitching for 4 hours until I had to go home and sleep for another 3 hours.
Shit sucked.
Seroquel is fucked. I was forced to take it when I was institutionalized. They put all the kids on it so they wouldn't have to deal with them. It was a huge joke, they'd give it to use just before we went for our daily amount of physical activity we were allowed, and by the time we got down there we'd be so fucked up on seroquel we'd all be sitting on the mats fucked up while the staff played basketball.
I never understood why people did that drug recreationally. It only makes you extremely sleepy. The hallucinations are induced that way, same way with ambien and benadryl.
tl;dr take real hallucinogens
Why were you institutionalized? That sucks.
[QUOTE=CreativeName;30966238]Why were you institutionalized? That sucks.[/QUOTE]
I have manic-depression, SAD, and PTSD. My senior year in high school and my freshman year in college, I was stressed beyond my breaking point and I had to go to children's mental institutions both times (I was 16 and 17). It was shitty 'cause they watched me pee and shower, and mixed with my SAD it meant I didn't pee until the pain was excruciating. They're dicks.
The thing that pissed me off the most is that we were all put on the same drugs regardless of our disorders, e.g. the seroquel. Ever since I saw a bunch of people who didn't need it forced to take it every day, I never understood why people would do it recreationally. It was an awful drug.
[QUOTE=Ultra Violence;30965920]Seroquel is fucked. I was forced to take it when I was institutionalized. They put all the kids on it so they wouldn't have to deal with them. It was a huge joke, they'd give it to use just before we went for our daily amount of physical activity we were allowed, and by the time we got down there we'd be so fucked up on seroquel we'd all be sitting on the mats fucked up while the staff played basketball.
I never understood why people did that drug recreationally. It only makes you extremely sleepy. The hallucinations are induced that way, same way with ambien and benadryl.
tl;dr take real hallucinogens[/QUOTE]
Take real hallucinogens? i take it for sleep wtf. Where the fuck did i say i try and use it recreationally? I can take real hallucinogens if i want.
fuck dd's post quality is slowly degrading into idiots posting nonsense.
If you want a piece of advice: remember it's your own dream and you can do everything you want because it's your own imagination.
It's hard to remember that when you dream, but when I got it, my dream became an orgy. Seriously.
i knew i could do anything but i couldn't wake myself up for some reason..
[QUOTE=FuckStephenHarp;30969806]i knew i could do anything but i couldn't wake myself up for some reason..[/QUOTE]
Yes, I got this kind of dream one time... It's really boring.
When I woke up, I saw I bit my finger while sleeping...
[QUOTE=FuckStephenHarp;30969661]Take real hallucinogens? i take it for sleep wtf. Where the fuck did i say i try and use it recreationally? I can take real hallucinogens if i want.
fuck dd's post quality is slowly degrading into idiots posting nonsense.[/QUOTE]
Wait, where did I refer to you anywhere? Someone's feeling defensive today.
Seriously, no part of my post except for the fact that I was talking about seroquel in a thread about seroquel addressed anything from the original post. I don't give a fuck about your lucid dreams, deal with it.
[QUOTE=Ultra Violence;30970562]Wait, where did I refer to you anywhere? Someone's feeling defensive today.
Seriously, no part of my post except for the fact that I was talking about seroquel in a thread about seroquel addressed anything from the original post. I don't give a fuck about your lucid dreams, deal with it.[/QUOTE]
it looked like you implied that he shouldnt take seroquel recreationally, when he wasnt in the first place, but with that post you started being a dick. calm down it was a miscommunication
Lucid dreams are fucked up. I don't often remember my dreams, most of the time so little, I think I don't dream at all. Sometimes I have dreams, but they are obvious projections of my inner needs, wishes and fears or occurances of the last days.
I never have nightmares. They stopped in my childhood but that is no coincidence and I know exactly how and why it happened.
Because it had to.
When I talk about nightmares, I get the impression people never really understand the gravity that this word holds for me. The thing is, I don't dream bad. I dream the worst. My nightmares are hell. It is the most raw, vile and disturbing projection of my deepest fears. It is almost as if my brain is working against me, trying to torture me. You might ask what could possibly be so bad to dream off but I wouldn't really be a ble to answer that like, say, someone describes a movie. The memory of what I dreamt is often trivial. The imagery banal things. The bad shit happens in the subcontious. And the worst part is that I am fully aware, every time.
It starts as a slightly lucid dream, nothing special but then I become more and more aware of what is going on in it. But instead of being in control, I kinda lose control. When I realize I have power over my dream it goes bad, no matter what. It is like trying not to think of something but you can't stop it from happening. I remember this feeling when I know that it starts. It is something I couldn't possibly experience fully awake, like the last second in a car accident when you realize you will die, multiplied thousandfold. It is like if your gut freezes and suddenly all the life is drawn from you as you crumble into a powerless, empty shell, about to be torn apart.
Then it starts. I know what it is and where I am. And I know I have to wake up, fast before something fucked up totally fucks my mind. I am in the situation, fully aware. I tried pinching once, but instead of nothing I felt a extreme nauseating pain, like I had torn the flesh and pinched the nerv. One time I woke up from the pain to find that It hadn't stopped and my arm was physically hurting. I can't remember from the confusion but I was in an extremely uncomfortable position, almost as if I had actually inflicted the pain by bending my limbs.
Now what happens in the dreams might not sound too bad, but as you might know yourself, the images are just what you contious self makes up to illustrate what the uncontious part inflicts.
One time is was in a school building. It was dark and it looked abandoned, with noone around. There was no light from the outside, it was in some undetermined place, or in none at all. I was walking around, wondering where the children had gone, when the becoming aware part started. I realized that now, that I was really here, I could think of anything to inflict upon myself. I didn't want to know where the children had gone anymore, I just wanted to wake up but I was moving by myself. I had a trash bag and I walked the dark empty corridors, full of paper sheets and ashes. Even though I fought it, I made myself open a door. It was the restroom. In there, it was dark, but I could see the stainless steel toilets and sinks. And all the limbs. Charred black, lying around everywhere. Arms, Legs heads. Empty sockets with the eyes burned out, the lids burnt shut. I put them all in my bag. Then I proceeded to clen the rest of the building. So many limbs. So many dead children.
But there is one kind worse than everything else.
The ones where everyone tries to convince me I'm not having a nightmare. Like the one I had, where I dreamt I had woken up from another nightmare. I was only a little boy and my mother came to comfort me. But I noticed she was differend. Distant and strange. I got up and saw my dad. He walked up and down the hallway in a robotic, unnatural fashion. There was no sound other that the noises of the people in my immediate range, meaning my parents. I realized my parents ahd become fabrications of my own nightmare and I did my best to blend in, make them not notice I was aware. I went along with everything. We had breakfast, but everyone just sat there staring blankly. No sound. No emotion. They were not human, only simbols of my frears and I had not to show any sign of them affecting me. But the situation made me incredibly nervous. I had to leave. and I realized I was sweating. I made an excuse and walked out the hallway. Then I got the worst shiver I felt in my life when I realized I had given myself away. I felt it, being watched, the eyes touching my back. I tried not to turn around but I had to. The last thing I remembered before my mind must have pulled the plug was the grotesque form of my father, his limbs stretched unnaturally long all over the hallway, crawling towards me like a spider with his face... I don't think I actually saw it, I tried to remember what it looked like, what disturbed me so deeply, but I don't think I actually came up with a image for it. It was just the pure horror, the face of all my fears, staring in my face.
Man I didn't mean to write all that. I just kinda got starded on the subject. Well, I haven't ahd any of those dreams in a while, and I am glad of it. but when I do the usually leave me a wreck.
The pain I feel in there stays minutes after I have whoken up and the fear even longer. Sometimes the voices or faces I saw come back even though I have been fully awake for almost a minute.
I don't know what my point it, really. I think I just wanted to get it off my chest, since I have never talked so much about it, even though it is a huge subject.
[QUOTE=Ultra Violence;30970562]Wait, where did I refer to you anywhere? Someone's feeling defensive today.
Seriously, no part of my post except for the fact that I was talking about seroquel in a thread about seroquel addressed anything from the original post. I don't give a fuck about your lucid dreams, deal with it.[/QUOTE]Dude that's just stayblazed he is a asshole to almost everyone, that's why his main is perma'd and some of his alts they have caught.
[QUOTE=steven688;30964880]Seroquil was the first "durg" I have ever taken. My legs couldn't stop twitching for 4 hours until I had to go home and sleep for another 3 hours.
Shit sucked.[/QUOTE]
When I took this it seriously did that too me as well, I was laying on my friend's couch complaining about my aching legs at the time.
It was like a dull twitch and then they would ache, I just went to sleep woke up fine.
[QUOTE=FuckStephenHarp;30960148]actually at doses for 300mg aboive it's an antipsychotic otherwise it's a sleep aid.
and i do have a script for it, jackass
[editline]7th July 2011[/editline]
fyi i took 50mg.
[editline]7th July 2011[/editline]
fuck go do some fucking research before you post and make yourself look like an idiot
[editline]7th July 2011[/editline]
hence why i'm on 25 or 50mg (phsych doc said i can choose depending how awake i am) and not 300mg or above
[editline]7th July 2011[/editline]
i have lamotrigine for my bi-polar disorder, and xanax for my anxiety and seroquel for my insomnia.[/QUOTE]
It was a joke you dumb cunt, don't overreact.
[highlight](User was banned for this post ("Flaming" - Craptasket))[/highlight]
[QUOTE=Ultra Violence;30970562]Wait, where did I refer to you anywhere? Someone's feeling defensive today.
Seriously, no part of my post except for the fact that I was talking about seroquel in a thread about seroquel addressed anything from the original post. I don't give a fuck about your lucid dreams, deal with it.[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=Ultra Violence;30966368]I have manic-depression, SAD, and PTSD. My senior year in high school and my freshman year in college, I was stressed beyond my breaking point and I had to go to children's mental institutions both times (I was 16 and 17). It was shitty 'cause they watched me pee and shower, and mixed with my SAD it meant I didn't pee until the pain was excruciating. They're dicks.
The thing that pissed me off the most is that we were all put on the same drugs regardless of our disorders, e.g. the seroquel. Ever since I saw a bunch of people who didn't need it forced to take it every day, [b]I never understood why people would do it recreationally[/b]. It was an awful drug.[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=Ultra Violence;30965920]Seroquel is fucked. I was forced to take it when I was institutionalized. They put all the kids on it so they wouldn't have to deal with them. It was a huge joke, they'd give it to use just before we went for our daily amount of physical activity we were allowed, and by the time we got down there we'd be so fucked up on seroquel we'd all be sitting on the mats fucked up while the staff played basketball.
I never understood [b]why people did that drug recreationally.[/b] It only makes you extremely sleepy. The hallucinations are induced that way, same way with ambien and benadryl.
[b]tl;dr take real hallucinogens[/b][/QUOTE]
oh you didn't imply anything? try wording your sentences better next time you lunatic. (lol you were institutionalized)
[editline]8th July 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=dvsilverwing;30978977]It was a joke you dumb cunt, don't overreact.[/QUOTE]
see if i was a fag i'd report your post cuz you could technically be banned for it, but since i'm not a huge faggot let me just tell you how much you fail at making jokes. Retarded, pointless, stupid jokes you're a pro at.. Maybe someone with downsyndrome who doesn't know what's funny might have laughed at that, but that wasn't a 'joke' that was just you being an idiot and not realizing i had a script to take it for sleep
[QUOTE=dvsilverwing;30978977]It was a joke you dumb cunt, don't overreact.[/QUOTE]you've always been so hostile
chill out
[QUOTE=TehWhale;30981336]you've always been so hostile
chill out[/QUOTE]
He could have just rated box and left it at that, but he chose to start something hostile with me way before I started anything hostile with him, look at what he said.
[QUOTE=FuckStephenHarp;30981231]see if i was a fag i'd report your post cuz you could technically be banned for it[/QUOTE]
What rules did I break that your response to me didn't? In fact, what rules did I break in general? If you reported me and I was banned, I could come back and report both of your posts, and you'd be banned as well.
flaming
im on it, 400 mgs.
probably gonna up the dose a fuckload more [img]http://i.somethingawful.com/forumsystem/emoticons/emot-unsmith.gif[/img]
I took seroquel and got fat.
Dudes!!! Peace guys, we are in DD, hit this shit and
[img]http://cache.ohinternet.com/images/0/0a/Feelsgoodmangreen.jpg[/img]
fuck when i actually remember dreams i have so much fun replaying them in the early morning.
i stopped having bad dreams along time ago, or at least dreams that don't make me afraid. i had a dream that i was on a boat and tsunami hit it and we had to survive or some shit. i think sufficatation(fuck im high) by water is the most painful and horrible way to go. i'd probably be freaked out IRL but i just was chill the whole time, woke up and was like "oh." and I felt something similar to a comedown for 20 seconds after waking up.
i wish i could lucid dream.
[QUOTE=TehWhale;30982323]flaming[/QUOTE]
He broke that rule as well. Plus, nobody's going to get banned for flaming just for calling somebody a dumb cunt, go and look on FP and look at how many people are called dumbasses, dipshits, stupid fucks, etc. and then look how many people are banned for calling them that. Not many.
[QUOTE=dvsilverwing;30982750]He broke that rule as well. Plus, nobody's going to get banned for flaming just for calling somebody a dumb cunt, go and look on FP and look at how many people are called dumbasses, dipshits, stupid fucks, etc. and then look how many people are banned for calling them that. Not many.[/QUOTE]See all that attitude's, unnecessary dude
[QUOTE=TehWhale;30982840]See all that attitude's, unnecessary dude[/QUOTE]
Not really, it seems like you're just choosing his side on this argument when both sides are equally as bad. Honestly though, I could care less, it's just the internet. Also, I don't think trying to intervene is very helpful either, Whale, it pretty much just makes the whole thing carry on considering the OP isn't really replying to me. I think it's best we just drop it here.
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