zonkem's tips on how to smoke inside (without getting caught) - General

disclaimer: obviously your houses are going to be variations on my own. these tips are general good ideas and may/may not work in your context. also i'm not responsible if plugging your door isn't enough and you get caught anyway It's one of the toughest things to do when you've got weed and want to chill out. Either the car's gone, no gas, or you are simply stuck the night at granny's house. Times when smoking outside simply isn't an option, whether it be too cold or too suspicious to leave the warm interior setting. Faced with risking getting caught indoors or the suspicion of returning home after smoking, many forgo the experience entirely in favor of playing it save. Well, I'm here to tell you that it IS possible to smoke inside undetected. My qualifications to say that? I've been smoking every day with the same routine inside my house for 4 years now and I haven't been caught or suspected once. It's all about minimizing risk, not removing it all together. Try to think of smoking in your house as a book keeper's odds; depending on your actions, the odds of you getting suspected of smoking are going to to get smaller and smaller, or potentially bigger if you are a big dummy. But without further ado... [B]Tip #1: Ditch the papers, grab the glass. [/B] Remember, you are trying to minimize the amount of excess smoke that occurs outside of your lungs, not increase it. Smoking things like joints or blunts, while easy to conceal, stay lit for the entire sesh and thus a mass amount of excess smoke is used. If you must use papers, take special care in regard to tip two. [B]Tip #2: Open a window[/B] Don't ever try to hotbox inside if you are trying not to get caught. It will seep into the walls and floors and really will be a bad time. The smell lingers for a couple of days too. Opening a window, even if you don't use a sploof to exhale through, is your best option. Blow smoke directly out of the window when you are done with the hit and if the pipe is still lit, place it in the windowsill so that not much smoke comes back into the room. [B]Tip #3: Get higher [/B] You remember your fire safety lessons as a kid? "When you are in a smoky room, drop to the floor because you will be able to breathe better." Think about this concept in regards to smoking indoors. If you are blowing smoke out of a first floor window, where's the smoke gonna go? It's going to rise up past the second floor before it gets into open air. But if you smoke on the second floor? It's going to rise up out of the window and go undetected. The upside to this is that there will be very minimal smoke that settles into the room of the house you're smoking in. [B] Tip #4: Hit the showers [/B] Just the bathroom in general is important here. If your bathroom has a ventilation fan in the ceiling, even better. The reason for entering the bathroom is for one reason: there's next to nothing in there that smoke can really cling to. Bedrooms often have carpet, or at least sheets on the bed. Bathrooms on the other hand are filled with hard tile, leaving less for smoke to really get stanky. If you don't have a ventilation system, run the shower at a very hot temperature for the entirety of the time that you are smoking. The hot vapor from the shower will generally nix any curious folk from inquiring about the hazy view inside. If you can combine this with tips 3 and 2, you're in really good shape. [B]Tip #5: Plug the door! [/B] Something that happens very commonly in America, where most of the house is made of wood, is that a gap tends to form between the bottom of a door entering a room and the floor underneath it. Any open air connecting your safe toke zone to the dangerous rest of the house is a bad idea. Get a pair of jeans, pair of pajamas, anything long enough to block the bottom of the door, and plug that shit. For additional safety, take aerosol spray (deodorant or air freshener) and spray it around the entire perimeter of the door. Anybody coming close to the room your smoking in will smell fresh linens and be none the wiser. This tip alone has saved my ass multiple times. [B] Tip #6: Clean up the evidence [/B] Common sense, but it should be repeated here. Remember to hide ANY and ALL things related to your smoking. This could include: lighters, bowls, bongs, nugs, empty baggies, grinders, dabbers, nails, and the list continues. This also applies if you are smoking in your own room. Remember to hide everything as soon as you are done just in case someone comes a-knocking. If you're not in a safe room yet and you can't carry everything out, HIDE WHAT YOU CANNOT CARRY BEFORE YOU LEAVE. A cardinal error made by a few of my friends has been the "oh I'll only be gone a minute" mentality. One of my friends' grabbed everything but his mason jar of nugs before leaving his bathroom, went to his room to put everything else down, and then came back to find out that one of his parents had needed to use the bathroom and was now occupying the space. Needless to say, he was sufficiently caught and it sucked hard. [B] Tip #7: Post-script[/B] Remember your trio: breath mints if you're going to be in close proximity, but at the very least some deodorant spray and some eyedrops. If people have any specific questions, I might be able to answer them too. These general tips exponentially minimize risk of getting caught. You could do all of the above and still get caught. There is no real definite way to not get caught, but this should allow you to have a shot at enjoying your high.

smoke at the right time, if you live with somebody else and they've gone out or something, make sure you know specifically when they'll get back and prep accordingly [editline]4th December 2013[/editline] if you have a square fan and a sliding window, lodge the fan in the window so that it's blowing air out of the room - an open window can potentially keep the smell in more than getting rid of it

I just smoke a bowl in my room, exhale the hit through a thick towel and use an ecig to cover any residual smell. The towel goes in a safe place afterward.

I smoke at my desk, which is right next to the window. I open the curtains and then open the window with a space of about 3-5 inches for air to come in and escape through. Then, I light at least two scented candles on top of my desk and close the door, running a blanket along the gap at the bottom of the door. I take hits as I please and wave the smoke towards the window, occasionally holding the pipe up to the window to carry out excess smoke when I can't take another hit. Then, when I'm done smoking, I'll leave the window open for 20-30 minutes, close the window and let the candles flood the room with their smell for another hour or so (staying awake of course to tend to this) and then I either leave them on or blow them out. I haven't been caught yet. I hide any supplies I may have within a drawer on my desk, under a DVD. a temporary change from the rear compartment of my guitar. [editline]4th December 2013[/editline] also, I keep burnt out matches at the ready - once I've got the candles lit, they're a silent method of lighting up a bowl - better than risking being caught from the 'fllllzzt' noise a lighter makes when you roll the flint. literally set the end on fire and hover above bowl. toke in, enjoy madness

All of that isn't really necessary if you have a few dollars to buy the right equipment. The best way to keep the smell away is to prevent the smoke from even escaping into the air to begin with. All you need is a smoke buddy and a can of smoke eliminator spray. [URL]http://www.smokebuddy.com/[/URL] [URL]http://www.amazon.com/OZIUM-SANITIZER-OZM-1-ORIGINAL-SCENT/dp/B000CSWCAG[/URL] What I do is pack a bowl with only a single hit in it. I kill the bowl in one toke and blow it through the smoke buddy. This prevents the bowl from getting cherried and releasing unwanted smoke into the air. After I take my hit, I blow it in to the smoke buddy which completely neutralizes any smoke. This alone eliminates 90% of the smell. It is still faintly detectable, so spray a few blasts of your air sanitizer and you're golden.

indoor smoking is a science that needs documenting and exploration rev up those studies

[b]tip 8: become a creature of habit[/b] it's way less suspicious to fall into a nightly routine than it is to do this once in a blue moon because anything out of the ordinary automatically accrues suspicion

[QUOTE=FFStudios;43071924][b]tip 8: become a creature of habit[/b] it's way less suspicious to fall into a nightly routine than it is to do this once in a blue moon because anything out of the ordinary automatically accrues suspicion[/QUOTE] would an example be burning incense when you're [b]not[/b] getting high so that anybody else in the house wouldn't see it as suspicious

I live in a dorm room with a common suite area we share with 2 other rooms and we have smoke dectors in our walls. We cover them up with plastic bags around the wall and then put puddy around the outside of the bag so NO bad air can get in. Then I crafted a little tube thing with a computer fan on it that sucks smoke in and then blows it outside through the AC unit. It works quite well. While we only use it with vapes and bongs. We then cover the bottom of our door with wet towels and febreeze the SHIT out of room and suite area. Our suite mates are also smokers so they dont give a shit about the slight smell in the suite area. But from outside the suite you cant smell anything. We also do it at night when the RAs are alsleep and nobody is walking around.

[QUOTE=geogzm;43071868]indoor smoking is a science that needs documenting and exploration rev up those studies[/QUOTE] I've only documented it in my head, but I have years worth of experience when it comes to covert smoking. The method I posted is the one that I found works the best in all situations.

Make a sploof with a water bottle filled with dryer sheets with a hole burned in the end. If you don't have dryer sheets, take a shitload of toilet paper and spray it down with fabreeze. It doesn't mask the smell, but it makes the smoke smell like something you definitely wouldn't characterize with weed. Make sure to open a window. Also, burn incense. It will be sketchy if you just start burning incense all of a sudden, but I was hella into it since I was a kid, so having smokey rooms wasn't too out of place for me. It's pretty much the best way to conceal it.

How about a rule about doing your business as soon as possible, no fucking around cleaning your pipe if someone else is home or may come home. The longer your stash is out the higher the chance of getting caught.

Another thing you can do if your bowl is letting off smoke into the air and you can't take another hit is to cover it with something like a coin or put it out with the butt of your lighter.

I like to pack bowls in my pipe that I can clear in one hit so then I can blow all the smoke out the window. The room barely smells after and it can be aired out with the window open for a few minutes and it smells fresh again. Lighting a candle can be useful if you don't want to spark your lighter every hit. Just hit the gas button and let the candle flame light it. Makes it a lot quieter.

I keep my nugs and my ground stuff seperate, pipe and nugs are well hidden. I smoke at night when a portion of my family is asleep. I open up the windows fully and turn off the lights. I turn on my fan so it blows air out and when i exhale i put my mouth to the mesh and exhale forcefully. After i put everything away right away and leave the fan on. My parentsare ex smokers. I have bad allerges so they never question red eyes either.

[QUOTE=WoodenSpoon;43073809]Another thing you can do if your bowl is letting off smoke into the air and you can't take another hit is to cover it with something like a coin or put it out with the butt of your lighter.[/QUOTE] Use the side, the metal part, because if cops find resin on the bottom of your lighter you can get a paraphernalia charge, and if you get busted they will check.

I don't smoke in my dorm room, but I learned yesterday its not smart to put your grinder and pipe on the heater to dry/undamp the weed in the grinder. While it made the pipe dry fast and the weed smokeable and not clog the pipe, it stunk up the hallway for a little while so I had to axe bomb.

sippin on dat dank ass ice cream coffee ma niggggggggggg

Pinchie(one hitter), spoof, fan pointed out window. thats about all there is to it. maybe my parents just dont smell it as much as others' parents though, i smoked many many times in my room and basement without blowing it out a window, an theyve came in right after or talked to me and didnt know. and they're pretty anti-weed [editline]5th December 2013[/editline] [QUOTE=AppleJackson;43076535]sippin on dat dank ass ice cream coffee ma niggggggggggg[/QUOTE] like a root beer float, but with coffee? sounds good as fuck

Oh wrong thread lol. But Ice cream creamer. That's good as fuck too though.

My pro tip is: Live alone. Edit: Didn't mean to sound dicky. Good tips for the many who needs it bro :)

[QUOTE=AppleJackson;43072338]Make a sploof with a water bottle filled with dryer sheets with a hole burned in the end. If you don't have dryer sheets, take a shitload of toilet paper and spray it down with fabreeze. It doesn't mask the smell, but it makes the smoke smell like something you definitely wouldn't characterize with weed. Make sure to open a window. Also, burn incense. It will be sketchy if you just start burning incense all of a sudden, but I was hella into it since I was a kid, so having smokey rooms wasn't too out of place for me. It's pretty much the best way to conceal it.[/QUOTE] I can confirm this method's work pretty well unless you get WAY too blazed.

I smoked once with the window open, door closed, and a fan pushing the smoke out the window and my siblings could smell it all the way down the hallway.

[QUOTE=AppleJackson;43072338]Make a sploof with a water bottle filled with dryer sheets with a hole burned in the end. If you don't have dryer sheets, take a shitload of toilet paper and spray it down with fabreeze. It doesn't mask the smell, but it makes the smoke smell like something you definitely wouldn't characterize with weed. Make sure to open a window. Also, burn incense. It will be sketchy if you just start burning incense all of a sudden, but I was hella into it since I was a kid, so having smokey rooms wasn't too out of place for me. It's pretty much the best way to conceal it.[/QUOTE] My sploof is made out of a paper towel roll reinforced with TP rolls, wrapped in duct tape to seal it completely

Close any air vents in the room. Anything that gets into a vent has potential to be circulated through the house.

I find that it's impossible to smoke some weed without getting caught :( I've been caught so many times. It's different with hash though. I smoke hash every day in my room while my family members are awake and I haven't been caught smoking hash yet :D

I used to do all of that shit before, and ended up getting caught because I was a big dummy. The next best thing to do in this situation is to have a talk with the people you live with on how you're going to manage the smell, keep discrete and not get high at times when there's shit you need to do. With a bit of bargaining I can now smoke inside as long as it's not cigarettes. Cigarette smell is awful. It's way better than having to hide, it easily gets tedious, especially if you're experiencing a bit of paranoia (whether it's due to smoking or anterior)

I'm gonna go ahead and be that guy and just say that this thread is irrelevant, if you smoke in your house, and burn incense, and get high frequently, you're gonna get caught in your house, not to mention I don't know anyone who just burns incense for fun and don't smoke weed haha it's just all so obvious, especially if your parents used to be smokers or something. Everyone always thinks they never will, and very few never do, but in the majority of times, you're gonna be caught. "But what about me, I've been smoking for like a year or two now and haven't been caught?" Your parents dont care! or they're trying to ignore the situation/ avoiding bringing it up by either being embarrassed, or nervous about it or what have you. You're never going to be able to know if it smells dank if you just smoked, and weed smoke is very strong, especially to people who don't smoke can smell it from pretty far away, or however light the smell may be. You can continue to try if you wish, but if you really don't want to get caught, just leave your house, and toke somewhere private outside, and that really can't be that difficult, especially considering many of you probably don't live in large cities, and even then.

[QUOTE=zach1193;43125384]I'm gonna go ahead and be that guy and just say that this thread is irrelevant, if you smoke in your house, and burn incense, and get high frequently, you're gonna get caught in your house, not to mention I don't know anyone who just burns incense for fun and don't smoke weed haha it's just all so obvious, especially if your parents used to be smokers or something. Everyone always thinks they never will, and very few never do, but in the majority of times, you're gonna be caught. "But what about me, I've been smoking for like a year or two now and haven't been caught?" Your parents dont care! or they're trying to ignore the situation/ avoiding bringing it up by either being embarrassed, or nervous about it or what have you. You're never going to be able to know if it smells dank if you just smoked, and weed smoke is very strong, especially to people who don't smoke can smell it from pretty far away, or however light the smell may be. You can continue to try if you wish, but if you really don't want to get caught, just leave your house, and toke somewhere private outside, and that really can't be that difficult, especially considering many of you probably don't live in large cities, and even then.[/QUOTE] maybe my mother's turning a blind eye for some reason but the last time she suspected I was smoking she was on my case like a hawk, it's been around 8 months and I've started smoking again, I've been slapping a blanket at the door, cranking a window and burning candles for a while and she doesn't notice any smell whatsoever

I kinda smoke next to the window, but you can smell it up the street...