I had to make this for class, it's due Wed. Rules were 1:00 or less before credits roll. What do you guys think?
[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9fi7lOyygN0[/media]
I like those "intense" moments, but acting-wise it feels a little stiff.
The ending is a little disappointing as well. Feels like you tried to set up a punchline the whole movie and then didn't deliver in the end.
I agree about the acting. We barely managed to get those two actresses to begin with, so I think we made the best of it.
As for the ending, I'm not sure I know what you mean. What would you have imagined as an ending that 'delivers' better? Hopefully that doesn't sound like I'm being angry, I'm just genuinely not sure I see where it would go instead.
[QUOTE=Biscuit-Boy;44783986]I agree about the acting. We barely managed to get those two actresses to begin with, so I think we made the best of it.
As for the ending, I'm not sure I know what you mean. What would you have imagined as an ending that 'delivers' better? Hopefully that doesn't sound like I'm being angry, I'm just genuinely not sure I see where it would go instead.[/QUOTE]
I gotcha. I'm just saying that for a humor sketch, it'd be nice to add a little punch to the ending...the current one just sort of "happens" and doesn't really seal the deal with the viewer, if you catch my drift. I'm no writer, so I can't tell you exactly what I mean on that point.
Originally we were going to have an internalized part, so she says
"Oh my god I'm the worst roommate ever"
And then it would cut to an extreme closeup of just her eyes, shot in front of a green screen so her surroundings are just complete darkness and she'd be standing under an intense spotlight. And the dialogue is read as an internal voiceover.
"Worst."
Zoom out to a shoulders-up closeup.
"Roommate."
Zoom out again to an extreme wide shot.
"Ever."
And then it cuts back to her as she faints.
But a lot of fun ideas like that got axed because of the time constraints. I think it would be a solid 1:30 to 2:00 if it wasn't for the limit.
Pretty nice! I understand the time constraints. Keep it up, though!
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