• Man Accused of Rubbing Produce on His Butt in Northern Virginia Grocery Store
    25 replies, posted
https://www.nbcwashington.com/news/weird/Man-Accused-of-Rubbing-Produce-on-Buttocks-at-Northern-Virginia-Grocery-Store-493507801.html https://media.nbcwashington.com/images/1305*734/091818+produce+and+suspect.jpg A man was arrested at a Northern Virginia grocery store after he was seen pulling down his pants and rubbing produce items on his buttocks, police say.  The suspect then put the items back on the shelves, a loss prevention employee at the store told authorities, according to Manassas City Police.  Officers responded to the Giant grocery store at 10100 Dumfries Road in Manassas shortly after 4:30 p.m. Saturday. Officers arrested Manassas resident Michael Dwayne Johnson, 27, at the store. The store had to destroy several pallets of produce after the incident, police said.
What the fuck is wrong with people?
This is why you rinse your produce off before consumption.
With hair like that, he generated enough static electricity to produce the energy requirements of Liechtenstein - you're so judgemental!
thankfully it happened to be in the other giant and not the one i go to frequently but still, for what purpose?
when you say 'rinse off your produce before consumption', do you mean wanking
exposing us to harmful bacteria so we develop resistance to it over time genius
guy was just making a point of the expression "always wash your vegetables before you eat them." he's the hero we never asked for, but the one we deserve.
Edit: it's an unpopular opinion but I dont think rubbing your bare ass on fruit and vegetables is wrong nor should it be a crime.
man its reading posts like these that make me realize I'm up way too late in the night
Oh yeah, let me just rub my raw ass juice all over these bell peppers. Not my fault the store has to pay to replace them, I should suffer no repercussions for my causing damages to store goods! Can't catch me, coppers! Oh and fuck the health and safety of whoever shops there. My anus secretions and all the disease they carry is for all to enjoy. My next plan is to publicly masturbate all over the apples.
Wait, that's actually the same user that doesn't think public masturbation should be illegal
For Fuck's sake man. Why is it always you?
surely you're fucking with me
So you think public masturbation is okay and rubbing vegetables on your ass is okay. Is there something you're suppressing or not telling us?
Why did it have to be Michael Dwayne Johnson, instead of Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson?
His name in the offender registry.
It's basically destruction (since it was total loss and not able to be put out for sale) of property, more or less. The guy ruined their product. It had to be thrown out and money was lost replacing it. It'd be the same deal if he just took that produce and smashed it on the ground. It's illegal destruction of something that's not yours, plain and simple. How hard is that to understand?
Jouska operates outside of space and time - there is no escape.
I just started working in a giant in the same general area. I was worried this was gonna be about my store for a second
He puts avocados up his arsehole in your [local store] to screw the ilberals.
Facepunch is a weird place
Guys we should be more sensitive to Jouska have you considered that he may, in fact, be Michael Dwayne Johnson, 27, of Manassas, VA? Look at the facts: Manassas -> ManAssas
Sorry, you need to Log In to post a reply to this thread.