It's apparently really hard to not make sexually inappropriate comments to your female colleagues.
Devil's advocate, but you don't have to be found guilty in court, when all it takes is to publicly denounce you on Twitter to tarnish your reputation forever
on the morning news a couple weeks back this facebook exectuive woman was asked about some of those fears and her response was just for men to not have meetings with women in closed rooms anymore.
I can understand the fear, sometimes you can be accused because that's just the way that person is.
I actually had a friend accuse me of harassing her via text when all I did was send her a "Hi".
Just one accusation is all it takes to ruin someone nowadays too.
The only worry Ive had about mentoring women is being overly self consious of when my instruction becomes mansplaining
I often overexplain shit, man or woman, in the hopes that they'll have few questions
I've had the same problem. I have a horrible tendency to say "like I said" while explaining things, even if I'm about to say it to that person for the first time. People have taken it as me being frustrated or acting like they're stupid for not understanding, when in reality I just have a terrible time taking my thoughts and forming them into coherent sentences.
Gonna play Devil's Avocado here, given the shit that's personally happened to me.
So my mind is a little fucked these days and sometimes I get a bit lost in my head. The result is me just sort of staring blankly into space for a solid minute before I come back to. I was working at a school renovation job when I got lost in my head and I guess I was staring 'at' a teacher. Now to be fair they had issues with other guys on the site being inappropriate before, however this was not the case here. Aforementioned teacher went to my superintendent and accused me of inappropriately staring at her, which nearly got me removed from the site and from my job.
Best part about it all is that I have no clue what the teacher looked like. Like I do not remember her at all because I was literally not seeing her. So I totally understand why people would be a bit cautious. Like I almost ended up fucking homeless because of that.
Yeah okay, that's all it is. Problem solved. Except all the constant false accusations and literally posting 1 thing on any social media about some kind of sexual harassment against you and your career and life is pretty much over.
I love how your attempt to preempt being called out for saying something stupid by saying that anyone who does so is an apologist, and therefore just trying to make excuses for wrongdoing.
I have endured significant trauma from a false accusation against me and they never went to court.
Didn't we have a thread on this a couple months ago?
You don't need to be considered guilty in the court of law, only in the court of society.
Yeah we did.
[Bloomberg]
How do you embed facepunch threads?
I wonder why men might be discouraged from interacting with women in the workplace if the advice they're given is to avoid interacting with women in the workplace...
I didn't say the problem was solved but I do think it's silly for people to say they wouldn't want to mentor women due to #MeToo. Also, you saying "constant fake accusations" sounds very hyperbolic. False accusations exist but they're not the norm. All I was arguing against was people suggesting that they're less inclined to work with women due to MeToo, not saying that women are always correct or anything like that.
Each time a false report case hits the news, more and more men join the group of not wanting to do anything with women, no one wants the risk.
Sure it might not happen that often, but the resulting effect of them results in things like this very thread.
Kinda bs that staring at a woman is considered harassment.
i dont think its a rational fear but it kind of makes sense. people are afraid of high magnitude events, even if their probability is low. despite how unlikely a false accusation is, people are afraid itll happen to them.
I think this a generational issue more than a gender issue. At least I haven't shit like that from any peers around my age.
Depends, it's all about the seconds system. 1 second is a glance. 2 seconds is flirty. And 3 seconds is borderline rape.
But seriously, at worst staring is creepy but I wouldn't say direct harassment, if they bring the staring to your attention and you continue to do so that's definite harassment.
Nnnno. Getting hard stared at is fucking terrifying.
You could probably word this better
hey @mangopickle I'd love to hear why you think me enduring something as serious as this is babyish
Eh how steeped into the real adult life you are?
I disagree. I think we're more in this climate because of the way we weaponize social media. People learned that social media has a much lower burden of proof than a court, or even an HR department. By bypassing all methods that require proof, you've chilled the environment because you've taken away the system that ensures that if a person is innocent, they will not face repercussions. So while no, it may not be prevalent, when you take away the safety net for that catches the innocent, even the innocent say "fuck this, I'm not taking the risk".
You just have to ask yourself if you prefer a system that protects the innocent at the cost of a few guilty slipping through the cracks. And that doesn't mean that the system we have now is perfect and doesn't need change, just that the alternative we are turning to isn't a productive one.
I think that's irrational. That's my point. False reports hit the news because they're big stories, not because they're common. It reminds me of when my grandma says she wouldn't want to go on holiday to the US because of gun crime, even though gun crime is still very rare in the grand scheme of things. We should be using statistics to decide what we do, not anecdotes.
Each time a rape report hits the news, more and more women join the group of not wanting to do anything with men, no one wants the risk.
Sure it might not happen that often , but the resulting effect of them results in things like this very thread.
Source: My ass
Because most rapes are not reported
And make up the VAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAST majority
What are you even arguing for?
That false accusations are bad?
Mmmm yeah?
Sorta says it all that all anybody talks about in these threads are falsesly accused men getting their lives ruined by those lying cunt whores and not the fact that legitimate workplace harassment (for both women and men btw) is a far more widespread and serious problem.
I mean, I literally just said that, but I agree on the whole.
Well, the thread is about the former, not the latter. So I don't see how that's supposed to be shocking.
Do you expect people to respond to an article about men being afraid to mentor women for fear of false accusations by saying "well sexual harassment is common in the workplace"? That may be true, but it's not really relevant to this specific subject.
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