[QUOTE=Dr. Ocsid;44658333]"I must inform you that I am intending to assault you by using the blunt force of my own head to deliver trauma and pain to your own, possibly rendering you unconscious."[/QUOTE]
now you gotta say it 3 times and really fast
"You do not possess the reaction time to draw your firearm out!"
I appear to have burst into flames
I do believe i am on fire
I say, good chap, you impress me with your exquisite skills in running. However, I must inform you that the projectiles emitting from my firearm travel at a much greater speed than you are capable of.
"...And from the very day on which Sun Tzu, the Chinese military expert and philosopher, congregated a pair of each living species of fauna onto a large oceanic vessel immediately prior to his physical degradation of the aforementioned fauna in what was surely a most disgraceful ignominy, henceforth on to this very day, any sizable aggregation of animals in a single circumscribed location is referred to as a zoo.
Unless, naturally, said location is not a public location in which live animals are displayed for public amusement, but rather a location in which animals are bred as a product to be slaughtered and/or sold off, this particular form of animal capitalization bearing the title of farm."
"Men who undertake the profession of developing studies and experiments for the sake of mankind have been quite interested in the subject of your rear behind, to which the body is usually assosiated with the process of defecation, in which said studies have been going on for an undefined set of years that is associated to the number one hundred... and by the means of the high advances in technology of going to another set of defined time I have arrived in this particular location and moment in history in order to proceed with the action of violently move my foot towards your aforementioned behind, as an act of violence and superiority in order to corroborate said studies done by my fellow gentlemen"
"It is safe to assume that, because of your actions, the remainder of the task we have been given will be relatively easy to accomplish. It may even be amusing to compare the difficulty of this task to human urine, a rather simple bodily fluid. It has also come to my attention that whilst combat is not your forte, you are all most likely the proprietors of small retail outlets, which supply the consumer with a large selection of flowering plant parts used to disseminate seeds."
"A this moment in time, I implore you to formally wish the cephalic part of your body which contains the brain, a safe and plentiful trip upon leaving the remainder of your body. You could easily achieve this task by simply raising your hand and moving it side to side."
"It appears that you rather like to vocalise your opinions and thoughts on my fighting style. I might also add that the orifice you use to produce such vocalisations is considerably larger than the norm. As you seem to be enjoying the moment, I will give you a fair warning. It is very possible that within the foreseeable future that the part of your body in which the aforementioned orifice is situated may lose all form of connection to your torso."
"My person appears to have taken on a state of matter of a far more combustive lilt than I intended it to be in, and I am thus suffering a myriad of ills and pains. I may require attendance from a medical professional."
Excuse me, but the ballistic projectile comes from the slender end, sir.
Please repeat after me, sir. Incorherent mumble mumble mumbling and I have unfortunantly perished.
May I please take your rotating fire-arm to a delightful medium rare steak dinner in the evening?
My dear sandvich, your actions are quite beyond control and have little to no orderly aspects about them. However I must point out that you would make a excelent addition to the law enforcement.
My fellow demolitions expert, you have been conquered by your peer! I have the sensation of perceiving all of existence! I have an intimate understanding of all of creation!
"I contract my diaphragm involuntarily and very audibly for it is apparent that my person is currently a supreme being of undetermined religious origin."
I am known as the heavy munitions and armaments specialist, however my peers have chosen to merely name me the heavy weapons guy, and what you see before both of us is the very kind of armament I speak of and utilize in my assingnments. She holds one hundred and fifty kilogram units of weight and in addition launches customized disclosed caliber bullets, costing two thousand dollars each unit of ammunition to produce, fired from the rotary barrels at a considerable volume of ten thousand bullets fired in a span of a minute. The cost of firing aforementioned bullets is four hundred thousand dollars for every twelve seconds of nonstop firing.
Oh, I find such amusement from no evident subject!
By the divine heavens, who has dared lay a hand on my beloved miniature multibarrel machine gun I have affectionately named Sasha? I say... WHO HAS DARED LAY A HAND ON MY ROTARY BARRELED HEAVY WEAPON?!
Certain individuals have thoughts regarding outwitting me in subjects requiring intelligence and sharpness of wit. Perhaps... perhaps. However, I have my doubts on their ability to best high velocity shaped bits of metal coming toward their person with intent of causing serious injuries.
Imitating your supposed cries of sorrow, I say, I encourage you to openly shed tears! Heh, Go ahead and weep as much as you please.
"Taking the form of a magical equine of myth characterized by its singular horn has been the most divine choice of life I have recollection of making."
Combination of wheat, meat and vegetable and yours truly shall engage in the activity of assault on your rear prostate.
Examples of positive traits I possess that confirm my abilities as a capable demolitions expert, you ask? Good sir, had I been classified as an incompetent demolitions expert it is highly unlikely I would be present for a discussion on such a topic, wouldn't you agree?
Dear sir, I must urge you to place yourself upon the control point or I will resort to placing you on the control point myself.
I, the specialist in the area of heavy weapons, shall now proceed to lay an egg in your mouth, just as I had promised earlier.
"In this statement, I shall politely thank you for your contribution to any actions you have assisted in taking for the past fifteen and a half seconds which may or may not cause the illusion of my words either having a sarcastic or positive interpretation due to my vague intentions, giving you a questionable amount of self-confidence to drag onward with our objective."
[QUOTE=Janitor_Stewie;44729553]I, the specialist in the area of heavy weapons, shall now proceed to lay an egg in your mouth, just as I had promised earlier.[/QUOTE]
"Now that I, the specialist in heavy weaponry, appear to have become combined with avian genes, I will proceed to forcefully eject a large number of earthworms from my stomach into your oesophagus"
Projectile Cavorting Servicemanne: Excelsior! Agony is merely an expression of fatigue vacating from one's anatomy!
Yonder-based Condottiere: I declare thus- the proportions interned within your cranium shall be fissured across a plain encompassing four unspecified provinces.
On this spot lies the unfortunate messager, his velocity in walking briskly was at a high velocity, and he has perished the soul of his life as one who have yet to engage in the act of procreation.
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