D&D V6 - Edition jokes don't really make sense anymore - Games

So here's what recently happened to a group I DM for, who likes having references or somewhat random humor thrown in, even if it doesn't entirely make sense. My players had gone into some underground structure, built by an ancient brotherhood. Through reading some old, worn scripture and a lot of filling in the blanks themselves (they're of the 'good at combat, not so good at everything else' variety of PCs), they found out that the brotherhood's treasure was guarded by several rooms, each of them designed by one of the brotherhood's elders. For instance, they had a room designed by Nathaniel the Mesmer, where they fought both enemies and illusions, which took them a while because none of them had ever heard of a mesmer and thus had no idea what was going on. Or Loghain the Prankster, where they had to find the real entrance to the next room or be hit by several jokes of varying levels of harm. I even threw in a room by Catherine the Herbalist where they basically tripped balls for a few minutes. Enter the last room. It was completely empty, save for the door on the other end. They walked across the room, no pressure tiles or pits. They checked the door, it was real, no illusion. They checked the walls, all very solid with no hidden patterns or entrances. They even briefly tried to dig a tunnel under the door or walls until they realized that wasn't gonna work. For about half an hour of real time, they faffed around with how they were gonna get around this fucking door. They eventually tried to open the door and...it was locked. Fine, they picked it. And opened it to...nothing. Just the treasure. They looted it but felt a little cheated. So they took the book chronicling the brotherhood's history on their way out and took it to the nearest town where someone might be able to explain this. After all, warriors like them deserved an explanation for such a weak climax. When a local historian listed off the names of all the elders and ended it with Jacob the Slothful, they all sweared at me and called me a cunt.

[QUOTE=Chronische;52690375]3rd edition was a mess - a sort of prototype for what FFG ended up doing with their Star Wars games, but also with stupid cards. 4th edition is coming out soon, which I'm excited to see. I've found, however, that Zweihander does fill that niche very well and is also free! However, WHFRP 2e is still a pretty good system with lots of useful information should you be looking for that kind of thing.[/QUOTE] I kinda like WFRP3e though. Never managed to play it, but I find the cards make it easy for people to have all their abilities in plain view instead of having to write down paragraphs of effects and stuff like that.

Party's rogue stuck in feywild, party is fairly clueness to where she is. One of my player then made this: [video]https://youtu.be/XzROzcJV_tw[/video]

DM'ed my first game! The first hour and a half was spent on character creation and the dungeon wasn't much, just stuff that I came up with on the spot, but it was still great. We have a gnome cleric of war, a human ranger (who is going to be a rogue next game), a tiefling rogue, and a goliath barbarian. They learned the dangers of splitting the party after they went opposite ways on a split hallway that I made clear which way was the right way, the Ranger set fire to a door after not being able to pick it, smashed a lock open after not being able to pick it, and almost died trying to pick a lock while the rest of the party was trying to keep the rogue from dying. Everyone had a blast, and I'm excited for next session already.

[QUOTE=IAmAnooB;52693898]Party's rogue stuck in feywild, party is fairly clueness to where she is. One of my player then made this: [video]https://youtu.be/XzROzcJV_tw[/video][/QUOTE] Wow, creative. Thats rather impressive. The best i get from players is memes, usually expressing distaste or confusion. A few choice ones from todays session. [t]https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/290187808663142402/359460778652467212/Sorceror.png[/t] [t]https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/290187808663142402/359483518230986753/Kentori_summary.jpg[/t] I was forced to join the bandwagon also. [t]https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/290187808663142402/359550237896998912/UWydWHA.png[/t]

The kenku one sounds like a pretty solid character idea.

I need some good comical NPC names, anybody got some good zingers?

Like are we talking comical but at least trying to be somewhat subtle a la Hugh Jass, or is it no holds barred with names like Priesto Changeo on a cleric

[QUOTE=Hey I'm Grump;52702697]I need some good comical NPC names, anybody got some good zingers?[/QUOTE] I have a few comical NPCs but they don't have funny names, I think funny NPC names are good for NPCs the players will meet once ever in a comical situation. But basically, one of the party's favorite bartenders is a black halfling named Bazoor Kotla with a child-like face and the thunderous voice of an african druglord. It's always a surprise when they go into the inn and the tiny black kid trembles their ribcage with his words. His gimmick is also mentioning creepy things to belittle the party. "Oh we need to get some sleep" and he's like "The devil never sleeps". Once they tried to rob him for a bottle of a really good salty drink, only to find he's the only bartender in the tavern, and he never switches turns with somebody else. They got in the tavern at 6 PM, and the dude was still up at 4:30 AM. He then said: "I told yu. Da devó neva sleeps." and the rogue deliberately told me he wanted to roll for WIS so he wouldn't be afraid of the halfling. He rolled a 1, and pissed his pants, then proceeded to run back to his quarters in drenched leather footsteps. I guess come up with witty quirks to surprise the party, rather than downright comical stuff. Perhaps come up with an escort NPC they need to keep alive b/c he/she knows the way through the dungeon, but give the escort a really low DEX, so they always know their way through the dungeon, but they always trigger all traps or something like that (so it's worthless). I dunno. Maybe a really powerful bard will accompany them in their trip. After they've already hired the bard, and are approaching the dragon's nest, one of the party members asks the bard "So what's your instrument of choice?" and the bard goes: "...the bagpipes." Sorry, these are probably shitty ideas. I just woke up.

I will never forget from a Traveller game, Mutumbe, Warlord of Education, who wanted us to help with some scheme to crash a planetary economy by means of making pennies out of gold. Also sending children to the acid mines Also the fact that every time we use speak to animals in our DnD game the animals in question get fatter and fatter. And more profane

My first experience with D&D was with an accidentally all mage party that hated one another, I haven't been able to get anyone to play again after that but it was some of the most fun I've had while it lasted.

Dragonborn monk has died in battle. He got caught in an allies spell and perished. He is now a ghost and is seeking a way back to life, meanwhile taking great pleasure in tormenting the gnome bard, Tozu for killing him.

How did a bard manage to friendly fire a monk?

[QUOTE=Yahnich;52704236]bards can use thunder wave, which i'm assuming is what got them[/QUOTE] Also Shatter. Gotta be careful about that friendly fire.

Yep shatter. Monk was just too close

-snip- I'm really not that bad to RP with.

[QUOTE=The Jack;52707538]I'm glad I never play spellcasters in DnD Shit rollplayers make me want to friendly fire, and with AOE spells, I'd really have an excuse.[/QUOTE] You sound like a joy to play with.

God damn it, trying to find a character picture I found a few days ago and google search history really isn't helping. It was a pixie in some heavy ass armor, with a rod skirt(pretty much a couple of rods hinged onto the armor, to protect the legs slightly I guess? wielding an energy tipped spear.

[QUOTE=Crimor;52709936]God damn it, trying to find a character picture I found a few days ago and google search history really isn't helping. It was a pixie in some heavy ass armor, with a rod skirt(pretty much a couple of rods hinged onto the armor, to protect the legs slightly I guess? wielding an energy tipped spear.[/QUOTE] On a whim, I thought I'd do some quick google searches and see if I could find it, and I didn't, but I did discover that if you search for "pixie armor spear" you end up with well done fantasy art, and if you search for "fairy armor spear," all your results are suddenly anime.

Due to the complex timing of gathering 6 people to play DnD, I'm thinking about possibly running my own campaign for me and my two buddies. I was thinking about a small kind of steampunk victorian vampire hunter campaign and my buddies really like the idea. The problem is that I don't really know where to start to even begin planning a campaign. Would it be better for me to run a quick test campaign before doing my own custom campaign? I always see people suggesting some mine campaign as a good starter. How would I even go about this? I don't have any supplies to do this at the moment but I figured I'd ask so I'd know what I'll need. I'm not expecting it to go perfectly but I know my buddies won't have an issue with any flaws since we're all new to this.

So I ran a session of dread (jenga based system) where the players were amateur lumberjacks getting a lumber camp ready for the actual lumberjacks coming a week later, but ~all was not as it seems~ one of the players who died said he actually felt good after his death because his heart was pumping and he needed to relax, and i got a message from another one the morning after saying that he had nightmares that night about the session can story time it if there's interest, but it's nice to have people actually invested and appreciative of something you've run

Looking to run Curse of Strahd, and I had a few ideas but none that are conductive with each other. I can run it as is, as a Gothic Horror campaign. I also had an idea to add some Cosmic Horror as time goes on, as Gothic and Cosmic Horror seem to go hand in hand. I also had an idea to completely invert the setting. Rather than making everyone dour and depressed, make everyone eerily happy and polite, to a disturbing degree. Or I was thinking of making Strahd an Archfey instead of a vampire, and setting it in the Feywild instead of Ravenloft. [sp]I'll probably just end up running Curse of Strahd: Bloodborne/Darkest Dungeon Edition though.[/sp]

[QUOTE=kobalt;52713465]Looking to run Curse of Strahd, and I had a few ideas but none that are conductive with each other. I can run it as is, as a Gothic Horror campaign. I also had an idea to add some Cosmic Horror as time goes on, as Gothic and Cosmic Horror seem to go hand in hand. I also had an idea to completely invert the setting. Rather than making everyone dour and depressed, make everyone eerily happy and polite, to a disturbing degree. Or I was thinking of making Strahd an Archfey instead of a vampire, and setting it in the Feywild instead of Ravenloft. [sp]I'll probably just end up running Curse of Strahd: Bloodborne/Darkest Dungeon Edition though.[/sp][/QUOTE] Why not just run it as is? It's the strongest of the 5e modules right now, ToA not withstanding, and editing it like that can be tricky.

today in D&D We learn entirely bad lessons from doing stupid things like we can lead 14 people against a hundred mercenaries, go full Black Hawk Down when some of our first-level named guildmates get killed, and in total we tear through about fifty of them, eliminate their leader, wreck a lot of the siege weapons they were escorting and then have to do a fighting retreat from the rest of the army which nearly sees many of us taken down Continuing our trend of taking on impossible odds and succeeding Unfortunately our cleric's god is a dick so we were only able to successfully revive one of the named NPC's. But considering we had a mad scramble through everyone's inventories to even scrounge together the diamonds the fact we even got one back at all is a small miracle

My new players are all coming from an isolated community of mostly dwarves and humans and I thought it'd be interesting if the people they encountered didn't widely speak common until I realized it'd be inconvenient. Most of the players are all speaking in their normal voices with slightly different candor so I thought it'd be amusing if for the rest of the game I put on a very slight, generic english accent for NPCS and always start conversations with "I'm sorry, could you slow down? Your accent is very thick". :v:

Finally upgraded to Roll20 plus. Holy shit dynamic lighting.

[QUOTE=Pax;52713141]On a whim, I thought I'd do some quick google searches and see if I could find it, and I didn't, but I did discover that if you search for "pixie armor spear" you end up with well done fantasy art, and if you search for "fairy armor spear," all your results are suddenly anime.[/QUOTE] 99% I found it searching for something lancer/spear related, didn't know I wanted a pixie lancer before I saw it and I forgot to save it :c

Has anyone ever accidentally run an RP only session? I ran a session a little while back and the players were preparing to go on a mission in s fancy ballroom. They needed in clothes and some assassin styled weaponry - the entire night was then going to different shops while formulating a plan of action. One tiny section of combat when they bumped into a thief. Endearing up being really fun

[QUOTE=Maloof?;52715309]Has anyone ever accidentally run an RP only session? I ran a session a little while back and the players were preparing to go on a mission in s fancy ballroom. They needed in clothes and some assassin styled weaponry - the entire night was then going to different shops while formulating a plan of action. One tiny section of combat when they bumped into a thief. Endearing up being really fun[/QUOTE] I'm pretty sure at this point our roleplay sessions outnumber our combat sessions as in, if the GM doesn't interrupt us with plot, we will happily chatter away with everything in sight and each other until the end of time

[QUOTE=Cloak Raider;52713194] can story time it if there's interest, but it's nice to have people actually invested and appreciative of something you've run[/QUOTE] gonna storytime for this because i'm bored af so for anyone who isn't familiar with the system, the whole deal with dread is that you adapt the story to match the state of the tower - you make players perform pulls for certain actions that you believe demand them, and as the tower reaches instability you ramp up the tension. so with this in mind, i crafted a tale in the 1920s: the story is that there was a lumber camp set up in the canadian wilderness by an entrepreneur from Washington state - he wants to set it up in an incredibly dense woodland but there's a farmer already settled nearby. the farmer is a pagan lad, and warns them that the land is not exactly friendly, and he is only kept safe because of an amulet that he holds and charges up every morning - the entrepreneur and his priest friend proceed to murder the farmer, his family, and the EP takes the amulet for himself (the priest doesn't believe in that shit because he's a MAN OF GOD) long story short: winter comes, they're about to leave camp and return in the spring when a tree falls and kills the EP - the lumberjacks bury his ass where he dies as they despise him (for leaving a lumberjack to die in the wilderness) and leave the priest in the camp for the winter this is where the players come in: the son of the EP hires them to go up and get the camp ready for the lumberjack teams (the players don't know that he can't find a single lumberjack to help because they [I]know[/I]), and they head on up guided by a mute, with a series of tasks to get the camp ready 1. get the axes and tools sorted and ready for use 2. get water and fill the main tank in the camp 3. get oil for the generator and get the generator started up 4. clean up the main camp they find the tools, find the water, get lots of shit sorted but they can't find the oil and a bridge possibly leading to it over a cliff is broken - the players agree to rest for the night however, when they're going to bed, they notice that the forest is dead silent. I hammer it home to them that they have never experienced a silence like this before, they can't even hear wind in the trees: one of the players was a scam artist medium, who had a fear of getting a response to their bullshit - i let the player know that they are feeling that fear when they try to sleep they barricade the doors (the veteran, a WW1 survivor does this), lock all the gates to the compound and try to get some rest so they can wake up at dawn due to the trash state of their sleep, they oversleep till near noon, and when they awake i inform them that they are still unable to hear any sounds from the forest - if i had to estimate player spook levels, i would peg it at a 3-4/10 they head to the destroyed bridge and use lumber from the camp to build a bridge over it, I make them do multiple pulls for this, the tower is nearing instability. Over the bridge they find a farmhouse, and a toolhouse containing the oils they need - I mention a second path leading down into the forest, but the players are spooked and return to the generator with the oil to get it started after a few more pulls, they get it started and lights begin to illuminate the paths around the forests, and they head back to the main camp. But along the way, they find an alternate route to the way they came back, previously unseen but now illuminated and containing a church two of the players, whose spook level is lower than the others agrees to check it out with the other 3 remaining on the path. The two players enter the church it is at this time that I say to the other 3 that they hear a noise, a cracking of branches, but most odd of all, the sound of feet - but irregular, no obvious rhythm that normally comes with movement, just a cacophonous sound of cracking branches and stomping - one of the three loses his nerve and starts to run to the church to warn the others, the veteran draws his gun and aims at the forest, the chef is shitting himself but staying with him - their spook level is a solid 7/10 will continue the story in a bit, getting lunch