D&D V6 - Edition jokes don't really make sense anymore - Games

i was very explicitly told by at least two people to absolutely not open it under any circumstances even my demon sword told me not to so i'm absolutely GOING to, I just have to figure out how to open it in a way that doesn't explicitly implicate me [editline]1st August 2016[/editline] i'm also chaotic good, technically, but i think i can argue that it was in bandit hands so i can't guarantee they didn't bomb it and i don't want to kill the governor by giving him a bomb accidentally

[QUOTE=E = MC Hammer;50809776]i was very explicitly told by at least two people to absolutely not open it under any circumstances even my demon sword told me not to so i'm absolutely GOING to, I just have to figure out how to open it in a way that doesn't explicitly implicate me [editline]1st August 2016[/editline] i'm also chaotic good, technically, but i think i can argue that it was in bandit hands so i can't guarantee they didn't bomb it and i don't want to kill the governor by giving him a bomb accidentally[/QUOTE] get mugged and give the guy mugging you it, that way if he blows up you can say it was stolen and if he doesn't and opens it you can say it was stolen and you went above and beyond the call of duty to retrieve it

In the years I've been playing DnD with a bunch of lenient DMs, it feels like an accomplishment to have had someone killed during my DM campaign. RIP Yu Ghotta, you fell unconscious through a sinking cloud and landed 100 feet below on a mountain summit.

[QUOTE=GastricTank;50810649]In the years I've been playing DnD with a bunch of lenient DMs, it feels like an accomplishment to have had someone killed during my DM campaign. RIP Yu Ghotta, you fell unconscious through a sinking cloud and landed 100 feet below on a mountain summit.[/QUOTE] but you gotta [editline]1st August 2016[/editline] actually all this trading of funny stories reminds me of the time when i was playing in a one off session of some system or other (probably 4e when i think about it) our local party wizard was pickpocketed by some kid and in a fitting show of overreaction, he blasted off two magic missiles from his finger guns and promptly blew the kid's (it was a street urchin) legs off from the knee down. brings a whole new meaning to kneecapping someone

[QUOTE=lintz;50810762]but you gotta [editline]1st August 2016[/editline] actually all this trading of funny stories reminds me of the time when i was playing in a one off session of some system or other (probably 4e when i think about it) our local party wizard was pickpocketed by some kid and in a fitting show of overreaction, he blasted off two magic missiles from his finger guns and promptly blew the kid's (it was a street urchin) legs off from the knee down. brings a whole new meaning to kneecapping someone[/QUOTE] not shittin', the character that person made was based off of that "Baby's Names" mascot on facebook i gave them inspiration bonuses if they brought me a funny baby name before each session the character specialised in Charisma and forcing people to act against their will [img]https://41.media.tumblr.com/3abcf21e13a6f8366d8252fa8673c22e/tumblr_njbp4sbyep1un3k3to1_540.png[/img] and then i drew it awhile back [img]http://66.media.tumblr.com/487650ab8459003ba2049234b4b15dc1/tumblr_o3r70amIh01rcaoyro1_r1_500.png[/img]

[QUOTE=FetchingToaster;50808533]First off motherfucker, I was performing highly invasive spinal surgery on that child as my tools rusted in front of me for the sole purpose that trooper would get a psyker kid. Second, that was a remake of rear's shitpost, forever lost to the sands of time: [IMG]http://puu.sh/qlrx6/ecc214191c.png[/IMG] Another shitpost I found: [t]https://puu.sh/gATBo/529ee443bd.png[/t] It appears Operation: Magic Missile is lost to the sands of time. How sad.[/QUOTE] It really does start to hit as I realize how much insane shit I had us do as the Rogue Trader and most of it was with the intent to create a new galaxy-spanning empire and to have the best pirate waifu in the Koronus Expanse. At the end of the day, Operation Two Shades of Ass was an absolute success (excluding awakening a Necron Tomb World. But, hey, shit happens).

alright alright, settle in. We were level four, 2/3 of us were asleep, and a dragon had just rose out of the lake and iceblasted the tits off the Bloodrager. We rolled initiative. In the proceeding fight, the rogue fails to hit every time, is swiped on his ass once, and then gets up just to be knocked unconscious. The competent fraction of the team proceeds to clean up one dragon nicely, albeit leaving us all at fairly low heath. The bloodrager, realising leaving rage would leave her unconscious, drinks the potion I gave her, healing a grand total of 2 hp. She then bolts off into water we know to be freezing cold, rage-swimming off into the dragons cave to desperately look for sweet sweet healing so as not to fall unconcious. I start carving the dragons head off, because why not. After taking out the frost-breath-glands we actually came here for and nearly forgot about, I rifle through the rogues belongings for an empty bag I know he has. It's obviously inside out. I turn it right way out and figure out it's a bag of holding the rogue has been carrying for probably 4-5 hours and not realised it was inside out. The bloodrager angrily swims back after finding some healing and we rest for the night. In the morning, we wake up to find a disease the rogue picked up some days ago is finally showing, and he's lay on the ground covered in disgusting boils, dying. The table is struggling to deal with this. The rogue is the butt of a lot of jokes, a lot of npcs are rude to them, they get knocked over in every combat and this is the icing on the cake. I'm the only one there to see it, the Bloodrager having swam off again to look for more treasure in the cave, and I'm in [I]stitches.[/I] He pathetically mopes around for a bit before trying to use a scroll of cure diesease on himself, after using some dust we found to lower the DC by 10. He fails. He mopes around some more before eventually trying to stab himself, and fails the Will save the DM asked for to go through with it. He further mopes around while we all laugh, before walking over to the literal-ice-cold lake and (passing the Will save) dropping himself in it, falling unconscious and floating off face down as he dies. While we literally struggle to function at the table he decides he's not actually done with the character, and the GM lets him not drop himself in the lake. He wanders over and feebly attempts to pull his tent out from under the dragons body, failing hugely, and then curls up in his tent and starts to cry. The dragons frost aura, which persists for a few days past death, knocks him unconscious. I try and make a heal check to see if he's ok but fail because I'm laughing so much (in-character). Passing the will save to compose myself, I stabilise him and drag him away from the frost aura. I help the Bloodrager sort out carrying the treasure in our now-right-way-out Bag of Holding, prop the Rogue up on a spare shield with a rope attached, and drag him back to the druid we were working for. He takes one look at the Rogue, bonks him with his staff, and [I]fails the caster level check for cure disease.[/I] He summons some plants to lift him onto his horse so nobody has to touch him, and we ride off. I start feeling ill and realise I picked it up when I dragged him away from the dragon, so I ride back and the druid heals me perfectly first time. We ride back to the stables, I push him off his horse and onto a hay bale with the handle of my sword, cover him with one of our tents and we go back to the tavern and spend the rest of the day drinking. In the morning we go to meet the new priestess of Pelor arriving in town, hand over the keys to the church to her, and she agrees to come with us and heal him for us. She does so, verbally tearing him a new one for being an idiot all the while, before eventually having to do the same for the horse which he'd spread his disease to. We bugger off to check on the farm where the disease came from (everyone there is fine) and I make friends with a doggo. All is well. We're not convinced his Rogue is going to last many sessions.

[QUOTE=Trooper-guy1;50810921]It really does start to hit as I realize how much insane shit I had us do as the Rogue Trader and most of it was with the intent to create a new galaxy-spanning empire and to have the best pirate waifu in the Koronus Expanse. At the end of the day, Operation Two Shades of Ass was an absolute success (excluding awakening a Necron Tomb World. But, hey, shit happens).[/QUOTE] Much like your situation with Traveller, I sometimes fear that any large space-based game I try to do in the future will be forced to live up to the legacy of RT I still, a year down the line, can't believe I ran that twice weekly for eight or so months

Today in VTM: I abandon 2 of the other people because we're all being chased by fake-cops and I see an easy out for myself, then feed on some hobos the fake-cops ran over and botch the Degeneration roll. In other words, [I][URL="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZAHk0g-Nfk"]I'm already a demon.[/URL] [/I]:blaze:

[IMG]http://i.imgur.com/qYAKqII.jpg[/IMG] my setting's world map is expanding! at least the continent of valeron, for now. the good thing about creating a world map like this is that players get to choose their own path of adventuring. they've got a clue that the baddy escaped to somewhere near the region of senistria. they could've taken the longer, safest path through the eastern coast. i was pretty naive to think that the party would've done that. of course they went through [I]amarguria[/I] because "we ain't afraid of no swamps". [sp]black dragon. they died.[/sp] [sp]at least the rogue got away.[/sp]

i love appleby's

[QUOTE=MenteR;50812416][IMG]http://i.imgur.com/qYAKqII.jpg[/IMG] [/QUOTE] Is Grimsbee just fantasy land Grimsby?

[QUOTE=Rats808;50812373]Today in VTM: I abandon 2 of the other people because we're all being chased by fake-cops and I see an easy out for myself, then feed on some hobos the fake-cops ran over and botch the Degeneration roll. In other words, [I][URL="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZAHk0g-Nfk"]I'm already a demon.[/URL] [/I]:blaze:[/QUOTE] Update: I'm wanted as a terrorist for some reason, the rest of the group isn't, but all they've got on me is a shitty picture from when I was running from a SWAT team in a hotel hallway. [sp]I didn't even do anything. Except burn down a shitty wooden house that was actually made of flesh and bone because the owner was a Tzimisce. Anything else they've got as evidence against me is circumstantial at best.[/sp] [sp]I may have punched a guy out. And been present when a church burned down, and later an abandoned brewery. But neither of those building burnings were my fault![/sp]

snip

[QUOTE=SiberysTranq;50811526]Much like your situation with Traveller, I sometimes fear that any large space-based game I try to do in the future will be forced to live up to the legacy of RT I still, a year down the line, can't believe I ran that twice weekly for eight or so months[/QUOTE] Now you've got an idea of fears I've had ever since the apparent legendary status my first Traveller game reached. I wouldn't mind a large space-based game like RT but with the fixes to keep it from getting too out of hand like it did nearer the end. I really enjoy empire-building and grand adventure in any form. That may stem from my desire to one day do a proper villain/baddie game. I need excuses to hang heroes over a pit of boiling lava and cackle on about my really illogical and dumb plans.

[QUOTE=GastricTank;50810853]not shittin', the character that person made was based off of that "Baby's Names" mascot on facebook i gave them inspiration bonuses if they brought me a funny baby name before each session the character specialised in Charisma and forcing people to act against their will [img]https://41.media.tumblr.com/3abcf21e13a6f8366d8252fa8673c22e/tumblr_njbp4sbyep1un3k3to1_540.png[/img] and then i drew it awhile back [img]http://66.media.tumblr.com/487650ab8459003ba2049234b4b15dc1/tumblr_o3r70amIh01rcaoyro1_r1_500.png[/img][/QUOTE] Do you take commissions, I fuckin love your drawings.

[url]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AMhFPQjGNl4[/url]

More quotes from our Vampire game. [quote]Franklin Rayne: "Jack what the hell did you do?!"[/quote] [quote]"Rats: im considering just like diving out and pretending to be a hobo"[/quote] [quote]"Jack finishes off a couple of hobos, making sure to try and pick ones who aren't displaying any DISEASES."[/quote] [quote]"Aaron B.: man we're over here beating ourselves up cause somebody got hurt meanwhile Jack is like eating people in the background"[/quote] Jack is officially the worst person. Humanity 3 and falling fast...

[QUOTE=elowin;50812720]More quotes from our Vampire game. Jack is officially the worst person. Humanity 3 and falling fast...[/QUOTE] I only lost 1 point. Granted, I do have Conscience 1 after that botch. :v:

[QUOTE=Rats808;50812749]I only lost 1 point. Granted, I do have Conscience 1 after that botch. :v:[/QUOTE] You have one d10 that you need an 8 or higher on in order to not lose a humanity every time you do something really terrible. Which happens a lot it seems. Humanity never again. Unless you grow a conscience.

[QUOTE=Spacewolf;50812673]Do you take commissions, I fuckin love your drawings.[/QUOTE] i do, yes

i might remember that in the future since my character art is usually poorly done in MS paint, like everything else i do

So I am new to this D&D thread, but i've been playing rollplaying games on and off for a few years and I've been getting really into it lately.. Its a shame though because most of my friends aren't enough into it for me to have a consistent play though going on. I enjoy streaming my sessions on twitch because I have people that enjoy watching it but then consistency becomes an issue with my current crew. Is anyone here interested in getting together and playing any sort of roll playing game, I'm honestly open to anything at this point :dead:

[QUOTE=GastricTank;50813198]i do, yes[/QUOTE] 10/10 would recommend commissioning

So one of my party members just died in my Rogue Trader campaign tonight. Long story short, we're on a space hulk, said space hulk has lots of fucking Tyranids on it, one of the NPC Orks was dragged a floor below us in space horror fashion, and my Ork party member thought it was a great idea to jump down the hole that was made to fight whatever was down there. Despite my protests. He turned on a flashlight and what stared back at him was a Hive Tyrant and a Carnifex barely fitting in the hallway of the hulk. Needless to say my character [i][b]FUCKED OFF AT WARPSPEED[/b][/i] down the halls, but not before my Ork friend was crit'd upon by the Hive Tyrant multiple times (aka HES FUCKIN DEAD KIDDO). My character wants absolutely fucking nothing to do with this hulk now. I want off this wild ride. [editline]3rd August 2016[/editline] First Genestealers, then lots of Gaunts and some Warriors, then fucking Lictors, now this. Did a Hive Fleet get fucking lost on this thing or something? Jesus.

Shadowrun was fun last night, my character was unconscious for most of it but the decker and adept hate each other now because the person we were selling weapons to was beating the shit out of a random woman her and her goons had been torturing, and then offered the killing blow to one of us, the adept pretty much made her look like a dipshit in front of her gang and killed the woman with one stab, was sarcastic when she demanded an apology and walked off, while the decker cringed hard and the gang leader lost it and beat the hell out of the corpse with a bat with barbed wire wrapped around it. We ended up getting less money, but we really need more professional contacts. [editline]3rd August 2016[/editline] Oh, and my character's girlfriend lit a dud pipe bomb as a prank and ran in panicking about it, I didn't know it was a dud and edged my throw roll to pitch it through a closed window :v: She had to go get it since she was worried about finger prints

[QUOTE=ForgottenKane;50821088]So one of my party members just died in my Rogue Trader campaign tonight. Long story short, we're on a space hulk, said space hulk has lots of fucking Tyranids on it, one of the NPC Orks was dragged a floor below us in space horror fashion, and my Ork party member thought it was a great idea to jump down the hole that was made to fight whatever was down there. Despite my protests. He turned on a flashlight and what stared back at him was a Hive Tyrant and a Carnifex barely fitting in the hallway of the hulk. Needless to say my character [i][b]FUCKED OFF AT WARPSPEED[/b][/i] down the halls, but not before my Ork friend was crit'd upon by the Hive Tyrant multiple times (aka HES FUCKIN DEAD KIDDO). My character wants absolutely fucking nothing to do with this hulk now. I want off this wild ride. [editline]3rd August 2016[/editline] First Genestealers, then lots of Gaunts and some Warriors, then fucking Lictors, now this. Did a Hive Fleet get fucking lost on this thing or something? Jesus.[/QUOTE] all it takes is one ship to fall victim to a tyranid incursion to produce enough biomass to spawn lie 2 carnifexes considering space hulks are made of like hundreds of ships.. [editline]3rd August 2016[/editline] also [url]http://geekandsundry.com/playing-dd-online-just-got-a-million-times-easier-dd-partners-with-roll20/[/url] WOTC is officially partnering with roll20 to bring D&D campaigns online it's gonna be pay to play of course

[QUOTE=Nerts;50821136]Shadowrun was fun last night, my character was unconscious for most of it but the decker and adept hate each other now because the person we were selling weapons to was beating the shit out of a random woman her and her goons had been torturing, and then offered the killing blow to one of us, the adept pretty much made her look like a dipshit in front of her gang and killed the woman with one stab, was sarcastic when she demanded an apology and walked off, while the decker cringed hard and the gang leader lost it and beat the hell out of the corpse with a bat with barbed wire wrapped around it. We ended up getting less money, but we really need more professional contacts. [editline]3rd August 2016[/editline] Oh, and my character's girlfriend lit a dud pipe bomb as a prank and ran in panicking about it, I didn't know it was a dud and edged my throw roll to pitch it through a closed window :v: She had to go get it since she was worried about finger prints[/QUOTE] Also thanks to my BASED HARDWARE SKILLS I was able to fix up the remains of the drones we destroyed, so now I've got a sexy, stealthy drone with an autoshotgun Also our next job is saving some girl from a Bunraku den and icing the owner in the process, should be fun

[QUOTE=lintz;50821588]all it takes is one ship to fall victim to a tyranid incursion to produce enough biomass to spawn lie 2 carnifexes considering space hulks are made of like hundreds of ships.. [editline]3rd August 2016[/editline] also [url]http://geekandsundry.com/playing-dd-online-just-got-a-million-times-easier-dd-partners-with-roll20/[/url] WOTC is officially partnering with roll20 to bring D&D campaigns online it's gonna be pay to play of course[/QUOTE] hahaha I still remember when they promised everyone who subscribed to their dumb D&D Insider thing a 3D tabletop program with custom 3D miniature creation and all the bells and whistles. That's about 9 years ago, now. Still not here.

[QUOTE=lintz;50821588]all it takes is one ship to fall victim to a tyranid incursion to produce enough biomass to spawn lie 2 carnifexes considering space hulks are made of like hundreds of ships.. [editline]3rd August 2016[/editline] also [url]http://geekandsundry.com/playing-dd-online-just-got-a-million-times-easier-dd-partners-with-roll20/[/url] WOTC is officially partnering with roll20 to bring D&D campaigns online it's gonna be pay to play of course[/QUOTE] That's really cool actually. Gotta say, the way that WOTC bounced back from the travesty that was 4E to what they are now (with 5E being (almost) universally praised) was really impressive.