• General alcohol discussion
    858 replies, posted
You are my new favourite. Get that Jack down your neck, especially the honey one that shit is gold. If they have san miguel drink san miguel that shit is amazing.
Free hug from bartender who showed me her tits the other night. Day is looking up!
You winner. Bartenders are the best people I swear. So many times I have gotten free drinks most of the night because it is a bartender I have known for a year or two. Fucking good people.
I think I wrote "fuck [my employer]" on the bathroom wall. Yeah, fuck those people!
Fuck yeah man, fuck the fat cats the fucking exploitive cunts, stick it to the big man! They need you as much as you need them, they should remember that sometime. Without you they are nothing, remember that.
[QUOTE=orcywoo6;39409350]Fuck yeah man, fuck the fat cats the fucking exploitive cunts, stick it to the big man! They need you as much as you need them, they should remember that sometime. Without you they are nothing, remember that.[/QUOTE] I know! I am awesome at my job, and this fuckin punk that's replacing me clearly isn't as educated and experienced as me. 95-100% customer satisfaction ratings for a full year! Who else can do that? So what if I crashed company van
[QUOTE=Used Car Salesman;39409400]I know! I am awesome at my job, and this fuckin punk that's replacing me clearly isn't as educated and experienced as me. 95-100% customer satisfaction ratings for a full year! Who else can do that? So what if I crashed company van[/QUOTE] Exactly man, at the end of the day he is probably just going to be paid less or some shit to satisfy the fat cats more to they can make more profits, its just from the company's greed, nothing to do with you. There will always be somewhere dying to hire someone like you, if not, FUCK IT, you can be your own boss and start something amazing.
Twice [editline]29th January 2013[/editline] [QUOTE=orcywoo6;39409428]Exactly man, at the end of the day he is probably just going to be paid less or some shit to satisfy the fat cats more to they can make more profits, its just from the company's greed, nothing to do with you. There will always be somewhere dying to hire someone like you, if not, FUCK IT, you can be your own boss and start something amazing.[/QUOTE] I wanna oppen a bar. With blackjack! And hookers!
[QUOTE=Used Car Salesman;39409429]Twice [editline]29th January 2013[/editline] I wanna oppen a bar. With blackjack! And hookers![/QUOTE] Oh my fucking god. Blackjack is my favourite card game of all time, when you open this bar I am definitely there. The hookers are a perk.
Bartender is ignoring me. Fuck you. Oh shit bohemian rhapsody is on! MAMA OOOOOHOOOO! [editline]29th January 2013[/editline] SO YOU THINK YOU CAN LOVE ME AND LEAVE ME TO DIIIEEEEEE! OH BABY!
FIND ANOTHER BARTENDER, FUCK THAT ONE THEY MUST BE A BITCH, the best bartenders will be your friend and talk to you and shit. Oh good god that song is amazing. I JUST GOTTA GET RIIIGHT OUTTA HEEEERREE!
Yes finally bartender listens. Time to cash out before I die. [editline]29th January 2013[/editline] Final count 4 beer 2 dickle 2 G&T 2 rum and coke 1 white Russian 1 jack shot $34 with tip 1 lost job...priceless motherfucker Tomorrow rest of my life begins!
You fucking winner. Hope you had a stellar night.
[QUOTE=orcywoo6;39409573]You fucking winner. Hope you had a stellar night.[/QUOTE] Best night I ever had sitting at the neighborhood bar drinking and interacting with as few people as possible. Booze is the cure for Aspergers, people! Spread the word!
[QUOTE=Used Car Salesman;39409613]Best night I ever had sitting at the neighborhood bar drinking and interacting with as few people as possible. Booze is the cure for Aspergers, people! Spread the word![/QUOTE] You are fucking awesome. Next time though, have a joke and a laugh with a group of random people, even if you end up not talking to them any other time. It really lightens the mood even more.
[QUOTE=orcywoo6;39409627]You are fucking awesome. Next time though, have a joke and a laugh with a group of random people, even if you end up not talking to them any other time. It really lightens the mood even more.[/QUOTE] Okay, I amend my statement. Booze is not a total cure. I will pass out and/or die before I have enough booze to karaoke and/or approach random people. Also my drunk smartphone typing is impeccable
[QUOTE=Used Car Salesman;39409657]Okay, I amend my statement. Booze is not a total cure. I will pass out and/or die before I have enough booze to karaoke and/or approach random people. Also my drunk smartphone typing is impeccable[/QUOTE] Its honestly easier than you think. I used to despair at the thought of talking to anyone I didn't know, but now its got to the point where so long as I have a drink in me I'll enjoy having a cheap laugh or some small talk with them. Its all baby steps, start small and soon enough you'll feel pretty confident in an environment with those you don't know. Oh god I know the feeling, I have no idea how I am typing sentences with fucking punctuation and shit perfectly right now.
[QUOTE=orcywoo6;39409680]Its honestly easier than you think. I used to despair at the thought of talking to anyone I didn't know, but now its got to the point where so long as I have a drink in me I'll enjoy having a cheap laugh or some small talk with them. Its all baby steps, start small and soon enough you'll feel pretty confident in an environment with those you don't know. Oh god I know the feeling, I have no idea how I am typing sentences with fucking punctuation and shit perfectly right now.[/QUOTE] Dude I did actual math a while ago. Calculated appropriate 20‰ tip plus a little change. I could solve a high school level linear equation right now, or possibly drive a rally car. I'm a fuckin booze Jedi! Being young is awesome. [editline]30th January 2013[/editline] Almost time to walk home. Hope I don't pass out on that poor.family's trampoline like my friend Adam...
I wish I had a bottle of whiskey.
[QUOTE=orcywoo6;39408967]I DONT EVEN, WHAT DOES THAT MEAN, YOU FUCKING PAGAN!?[/QUOTE] It's The Big Labowski
Walked a quarter mile through hostile, extremely dangerous white middle class suburb to get home, successfully typed in my password and logged into Facepunch on my home computer. Dude, I AM a fuckin Booze Jedi. What is NASA's email, I could drive the fuckin Space Shuttle while completely obliterated drunk. I think I'll play Orbiter just to further prove my point that NASA should totally hire me.
[QUOTE=Used Car Salesman;39409965]Walked a quarter mile through hostile, extremely dangerous white middle class suburb to get home, successfully typed in my password and logged into Facepunch on my home computer. Dude, I AM a fuckin Booze Jedi. What is NASA's email, I could drive the fuckin Space Shuttle while completely obliterated drunk. I think I'll play Orbiter just to further prove my point that NASA should totally hire me.[/QUOTE] Jesus christ someone get this man another drink, another drunk man that doesn't even feel drunk. We are one and the same, lets go to fucking space COME ON NASA FUCKING GET US UP THERE YOU CUNTS. Wait, dangerous and whites in the same sentence? Us white people are harmless. :v:
[QUOTE=orcywoo6;39410009]Jesus christ someone get this man another drink, another drunk man that doesn't even feel drunk. We are one and the same, lets go to fucking space COME ON NASA FUCKING GET US UP THERE YOU CUNTS. Wait, dangerous and whites in the same sentence? Us white people are harmless. :v:[/QUOTE] No, dude, white people are totally not harmless. I mean, one false move, day or night, and BANG! Wine and cheese party.
[QUOTE=Used Car Salesman;39410022]No, dude, white people are totally not harmless. I mean, one false move, day or night, and BANG! Wine and cheese party.[/QUOTE] Well I guess I'm biased since I'm british and I'm coming from an average white Brit perspective, we're mostly harmless though. Most likely you'll be offered a cup of tea or a beer.
what is going on
Drinking because of problems you have isn't a good idea. You drink for fun. To enjoy it. To be social.
[QUOTE=mac338;39410733]Drinking because of problems you have isn't a good idea. You drink for fun. To enjoy it. To be social.[/QUOTE] Nope. Drown my sorrows. Cue 'you have a problem' responses.
[QUOTE=mac338;39410733]Drinking because of problems you have isn't a good idea. You drink for fun. To enjoy it. To be social.[/QUOTE] You can better talk about problems when u are drunk! :P
Drink because you enjoy the taste of the drink you are having and relish in the side effects, don't drink solely for the alcohol
[QUOTE=Lonestriper;39412104]Drink because you enjoy the taste of the drink you are having and relish in the side effects, don't drink solely for the alcohol[/QUOTE] If I was drinking solely for the alcohol, I wouldn't be constantly toggling back and forth between all the different drinks I enjoy. I am definitely saving screengrabs of the last page or two. That night was pretty fucked up. Hangover is honestly not bad at all. Coffee, breakfast, and shower and I'm good. As long as I don't let anyone talk me into Jaeger shots, the next morning usually turns out okay. But Jaeger will make me fucking sick and miserable.
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