My girlfriend of three years just confessed to me that she used to be a man
913 replies, posted
[QUOTE=RobbL;37677072]They're not physiologically real girls[/QUOTE]
I don't care what you say, transgendered girls are just as real as any other girl. They just are a bit different because some fucked up hormones before they were born.
Trust me I know what I'm talking about.
[QUOTE=andrey191919;37675586]No, at first I was doubtful because she is so feminine, I could never imagine her as a man. So she gave me one of her medications, and I researched it, and it is what trannies take.
[img_thumb]http://i.imgur.com/6x5J5.jpg[/img_thumb][/QUOTE]
Just a heads up, even though it's already been said: It's really damn offensive when you call us "Trannys" or "Trannies". There's no reason to stop being with someone just because they were born with male body parts. If you think you should stop just because of that then you are an idiot. Treat her like any other woman and don't be a dick to her. Don't call her a "Tranny" and don't say anything rude about it. She is a woman and she deserves to be treated like one and not some sort of weird outcast. Most of you need to grow up and realize this. If you outcast someone just because of that then you will become a complete fucking low life to me. This honestly should have no impact on your relationship at all.
I don't mind that we would have to adopt if we ever wanted kids. I would prefer giving a family to a kid that needs one, than just creating another.
Also, about the lubrication, yes, there's nothing wrong there as long as there is foreplay. I never noticed any problems.
I know that she isn't a real girl. That's what makes me sad and worry. :(
[QUOTE=LordCrypto;37677090]i'm agreeing with you.[/QUOTE]
People have to realize that sex and gender are different things.
Being female as sex is what you described. Sometimes things just aren't that simple, at that point it comes to gender what the person really is.
It's just that people just believe what they see so they don't care what people say. I'm pretty darn sure everyone knows their own gender the best.
If I were you I would break up with her just knowing she used to have a penis would make me sick , but that's just my opinion .
[QUOTE=andrey191919;37677112]
[b]I know that she isn't a real girl. That's what makes me sad and worry. :([/b][/QUOTE]
She IS a real girl and you have no reason to be sad or worried.
[QUOTE=Skelmech;37677004]What? I never said there wasn't a difference between a normal and sexual relationship? I said there's no difference between a transgirl and a cisgirl. That includes a sexual and non sexual relationship or just simple friendship FFS.
They're both "real" girls do there's no reason for you to be uncomfortable with the idea of dating a transgirl. Not being able to have kids may be something you dislike but not something to be uncomfortable over.[/QUOTE]
I had to haul ass out of bed because I am not typing this on a mobile fapping device. Thank you for getting me out of bed.
You called me transphobic.
I was offended because I had no problem with LGBT.
You said that there is "no difference between dating and fucking her than there is a cisgirl"
I then said that's different by stating that committed relationships are much different than uncommitted relationships.
I am absolutely uncomfortable with having a committed relationship with a transgendered woman because I don't get any kids at the end which makes me unhappy. The goal of a mutual committed relationship is when both parties are happy. Therefor it is unwise that I date a transgendered person because I am unhappy that I don't get mini-roflburgers at the end.
everybody sounds like Pinocchio going "I WANT TO BE WITH A REAL GIRL!!"
what the hell does it matter.
[QUOTE=andrey191919;37677112]I don't mind that we would have to adopt if we ever wanted kids. I would prefer giving a family to a kid that needs one, than just creating another.
Also, about the lubrication, yes, there's nothing wrong there as long as there is foreplay. I never noticed any problems.
I know that she isn't a real girl. That's what makes me sad and worry. :([/QUOTE]
Honestly I don't think you deserve her if you think that. She's as fucking real as any other girl out there.
[QUOTE=Inufin;37677126]People have to realize that sex and gender are different things.
Being female as sex is what you described. Sometimes things just aren't that simple, at that point it comes to gender what the person really is.
It's just that people just believe what they see so they don't care what people say. I'm pretty darn sure everyone knows their own gender the best.[/QUOTE]
I don't disagree with you. I agree that the [B]gender[/B] of a srs person is what they say it is, but I don't feel that their [B]sex[/B] is what it is outwardly.
[QUOTE=andrey191919;37677112]I don't mind that we would have to adopt if we ever wanted kids. I would prefer giving a family to a kid that needs one, than just creating another.
Also, about the lubrication, yes, there's nothing wrong there as long as there is foreplay. I never noticed any problems.
I know that she isn't a real girl. That's what makes me sad and worry. :([/QUOTE]
Any trouble that you have now is completely your fault. You're choosing to look at something that you can't even see rather than what's directly in front of you. Stop trying to look at chromosomes for two seconds and things will be fine.
[QUOTE=ROFLBURGER;37677159]I had to haul ass out of bed because I am not typing this on a mobile fapping device. Thank you for getting me out of bed.
You called me transphobic.
I was offended because I had no problem with LGBT.
You said that there is "no difference between dating and fucking her than there is a cisgirl"
I then said that's different by stating that committed relationships are much different than uncommitted relationships.
I am absolutely uncomfortable with having a committed relationship with a transgendered woman because I don't get any kids at the end which makes me unhappy. The goal of a mutual committed relationship is when both parties are happy. Therefor it is unwise that I date a transgendered person because I am unhappy that I don't get mini-roflburgers at the end.[/QUOTE]
So, would you have a relationship with a girl who had a hysterectomy, or has been infertile from birth? If yes, yeah, that's pretty transphobic.
What if she has a male mind though? I know most transsexuals feel that they have a female mind and a male body and that's why they get a sex change, but surely there must be exceptions. I did some research and found a condition named "Autogynephilia". Although my girlfriend has always acted very feminine, it could just be that, an act. I doubt it, but it's a possibility and it terrifies me.
[QUOTE=Inufin;37677102]I don't care what you say, transgendered girls are just as real as any other girl. They just are a bit different because some fucked up hormones before they were born.
[/QUOTE]
As long as they look like their gender I don't care, but logically speaking they're not physiologically real girls as the sexual organs that define a physiological female are either artificial or aren't their at all. I don't mean to offend anyone, but it's pretty obvious from a scientific standpoint
Anyway I do believe that gender, not sex, dictates whether you're a female or not in the general sense of the word. They're not physiologically 'real' women, but are true women in every other sense of the word
[QUOTE=VIOLATION_SNG;37677172]Honestly I don't think you deserve her if you think that. She's as fucking real as any other girl out there.[/QUOTE]
um
last time I checked transsexuals can't make babby
[QUOTE=andrey191919;37677223]What if she has a male mind though? I know most transsexuals feel that they have a female mind and a male body and that's why they get a sex change, but surely there must be exceptions. I did some research and found a condition named "Autogynephilia". Although my girlfriend has always acted very feminine, it could just be that, an act. I doubt it, but it's a possibility and it terrifies me.[/QUOTE]
'a male mind' hahaha oh wow
[QUOTE=Riodoku;37677199]
So, would you have a relationship with a girl who had a hysterectomy, or has been infertile from birth? If yes, yeah, that's pretty transphobic.[/QUOTE]
I would not have a committed relationship with a female if she could not give birth.
physiosocially the gender they are
they are not physiologically that gender
[QUOTE=andrey191919;37677223]What if she has a male mind though? I know most transsexuals feel that they have a female mind and a male body and that's why they get a sex change, but surely there must be exceptions. I did some research and found a condition named "Autogynephilia". Although my girlfriend has always acted very feminine, it could just be that, an act. I doubt it, but it's a possibility and it terrifies me.[/QUOTE]
What the hell are you even spewing out now? There is no reason to get so worked up over this. Sure it's not what you expected but she is still a woman and you should treat her like that. If you have "Autogynephilia" then you don't go all the way and get a sex change. Autogynephilia is not even proven to exist.
[QUOTE=andrey191919;37677223]What if she has a male mind though? I know most transsexuals feel that they have a female mind and a male body and that's why they get a sex change, but surely there must be exceptions. I did some research and found a condition named "Autogynephilia". Although my girlfriend has always acted very feminine, it could just be that, an act. I doubt it, but it's a possibility and it terrifies me.[/QUOTE]
You cannot hold an act for three years. If she's comfortable enough to tell you this, she's comfortable enough to be herself around you.
[QUOTE=ROFLBURGER;37677244]I would not have a committed relationship with a female if she could not give birth.[/QUOTE]
classy pickup lines 101
[QUOTE=ROFLBURGER;37677229]um
last time I checked transsexuals can't make babby[/QUOTE]
so infertile women and women with their tubes tied aren't real women?
[QUOTE=andrey191919;37677223]What if she has a male mind though? I know most transsexuals feel that they have a female mind and a male body and that's why they get a sex change, but surely there must be exceptions. I did some research and found a condition named "Autogynephilia". Although my girlfriend has always acted very feminine, it could just be that, an act. I doubt it, but it's a possibility and it terrifies me.[/QUOTE]
She's had surgery and takes hormone treatments to be herself. That's a LOT of money spent for an act.
Also autogynephilia has nothing to do with this. Thats where you get off to picturing yourself as a girl but have no inclination to do it.
[QUOTE=LordCrypto;37677245]physiosocially the gender they are
they are not physiologically that gender[/QUOTE]
so what?
you keep saying this but i don't think you realize that it really doesn't matter. you should love a person for who they are and not because of their chromosomes.
I'd like to be a woman for a day to see what's it like
although not while on the PMS
[QUOTE=VIOLATION_SNG;37677253]What the hell are you even spewing out now? There is no reason to get so worked up over this. Sure it's not what you expected but she is still a woman and you should treat her like that. If you have "Autogynephilia" then you don't go all the way and get a sex change. Autogynephilia is not even proven to exist.[/QUOTE]
holy shit you know those stereotypical white women that scream "OMG RACIST" if you say the word "black"? youre like that but with trans people
I do love her, and I have no intention of leaving her or consciously treating her differently. I am just very confused and worried about this LIE that she has kept for three years, and that she used to be a man.
Edit:
Or a boy, apparently she started this when she was 14. It's a relief to know that she never had a beard etc.
[QUOTE=SgtCr4zyGunz;37677267]so infertile women and women with their tubes tied aren't real women?[/QUOTE]
I think he means they don't have any of the organs required for reproduction
[QUOTE=andrey191919;37677223]What if she has a male mind though? I know most transsexuals feel that they have a female mind and a male body and that's why they get a sex change, but surely there must be exceptions. I did some research and found a condition named "Autogynephilia". Although my girlfriend has always acted very feminine, it could just be that, an act. I doubt it, but it's a possibility and it terrifies me.[/QUOTE]
If you have autogynephilia you probably wouldn't even get past a psychiatrist to get HRT.
[QUOTE=andrey191919;37677305]I do love her, and I have no intention of leaving her or consciously treating her differently. I am just very confused and worried about this LIE that she has kept for three years, and that she used to be a man.
Edit:
Or a boy, apparently she started this when she was 14. It's a relief to know that she never had a beard etc.[/QUOTE]
It's probably one of the hardest things to tell anyone dude.
[QUOTE=VIOLATION_SNG;37677172]Honestly I don't think you deserve her if you think that. She's as fucking real as any other girl out there.[/QUOTE]
Please bare in mind when involving yourself in this that not everyone is going to share how you feel about it. OP shouldn't feel shallow if he ends up breaking it off, of course try to see past gender and love them for all the reasons you did before, but if you can't help being put off by their gender then that isn't your fault at all. It's shitty, but that's the risk they run for decieving someone, even if you can sympathise why they did it.
Just ignore Violation_SNG, he uses boxes as a way to counter your argument.
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